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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

am i being ungrateful and stupid?

105 replies

mamamibbo · 02/09/2012 23:20

MIL has decided the children need one of those big garden trampolines they are 10 (with asd) 3,2 and 7 months so she is getting them one for christmas, which is very generous

but i dont like them, i think they are dangerous

apparently i should be grateful she wants to spend that amount of money one them and accept the gift as that would be ungrateful and its stupd,i "cant wrap them in cotton wool, they wouldnt sell them if they were dangerous"

aibu?

OP posts:
cocolepew · 02/09/2012 23:22

If you dont want it, refuse it. It was the best thing I've ever gotten my DDs but I know others hate them.

SharpObject · 02/09/2012 23:22

Will it have a safety net?

I don't like trampolines

paddyclamp · 02/09/2012 23:22

A friend of mine's DD broke her leg really badly on one so i've always been a bit Hmm of them since! YANBU

GetOrfAKAMrsUsainBolt · 02/09/2012 23:23

I think they are a bit shite, and plus it is your garden. It would get on my nerves that she is so dictatorial.

I know that people like them a lot, and perhaps your children would as well, but I also think they could be a pain in the arse with 4 children to police on it.

Nanny0gg · 02/09/2012 23:24

It's your house and your children. If you don't want it, graciously decline. (And I hate them too!)

Original poster
mamamibbo · 02/09/2012 23:24

i have refused it but shes adamant they need one and yes it has a safety net

OP posts:
JumpingThroughMoreHoops · 02/09/2012 23:25

I work in a school. We considered installing trampolines in the playground for use but the "A" spectrum children - but it was cost prohibitive on staff to supervise - burning off excess energy is a good thing.

I would suggest Christmas is the wrong time - maybe an Easter present - it will languish outside and perish over winter..

Just make sure she gets the net cage to go round it. And your lawn will die under it.

oreocrumbs · 02/09/2012 23:25

I'm being a bit hipocritical as we have one, but they are dangerous when more than one child uses them.

I know two children who have had small fractures basically because as one larger child goes up and the smaller one goes down it over jars the leg (or something along those lines).

So no YANBU. I think it is up to the parent, whos job it will be to police the using of it, to decide if they want one or not.

Yes it is generous and I'm sure she means well, but I would ask her not to get one.

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 02/09/2012 23:25

I understand you being wary, but I think they are safe enough as long as you set out and strictly enforce ground rules. There is a risk with most things, that doesn't mean we shouldn't do them at all. It's about weighing up the risks, and having a trampoline will have benefits too.

Make sure it has a net, make sure they always do it up before playing, don't have too many on it at the same time, and inspect the whole thing regularly to make sure it's not wearing out.

thepeoplesprincess · 02/09/2012 23:26

I think you're being ungrateful and stupid..... but I like trampolines.

JumpingThroughMoreHoops · 02/09/2012 23:28

TBH with the sale on now, you can get a complete 8 foot one now in Asda for 80 quid, with net.

It's not an ostentatious sort of gift any more.

FatherHankTree · 02/09/2012 23:29

As long as you're careful with how many are on it at one time, it should be ok. I'm a little paranoid about them though, as DD had a severe back injury on one.

Backtobedlam · 02/09/2012 23:31

I would probably say they are a bit young for it yet. The 10yr old faur enough, but with 3 younger ones you will have to be out there all the time supervising, taking shoes off, putting them back on, telling them to calm down...and so on. It's not ungrateful if you say thank you for the very kind offer but you have read x, y, z (there must be stories out there somewhere) and you just don't want to risk it. Maybe you could suggest something else?

WorraLiberty · 02/09/2012 23:31

I think they're a fantastic way to keep fit, especially since so many children aren't allowed to play out in the street any more.

As long as it has a safety net and one child at a time bounces on it, there's absolutely no problem at all.

ThePigOnTheWall · 02/09/2012 23:32

My dc have one. Tbh it's the best present I ever bought, they use it daily, eat their lunch on it, read on it, play under it when it's raining, and generally love it.

Sorry if that's not what you want to hear Blush

GetOrfAKAMrsUsainBolt · 02/09/2012 23:33

I don't like them as one of dd's mates fell off one in spectacular fashion and broke both arms in several places (at the age of bloody 14).

EyeoftheStorm · 02/09/2012 23:35

DD1 has fractured her wrist on one and DS2 hyperflexed (if that is a word) his knee on another and limped around for three days squawking 'can't walk, can't walk'.

They're not for me.

Nanny0gg · 02/09/2012 23:37

I don't understand. For one thing they are not a toy. A safety net won't stop a broken neck if they fall awkwardly. They should have adult supervision when they're on one, so the OP will not find them much help in keeping the children occupied without her there.
And if she doesn't like them/doesn't want them then why the hell should her mother be allowed to insist that the children must have one?

PedanticPanda · 02/09/2012 23:39

Your oldest dx with ASD, do they have hyper mobility (I know it's common with those on the spectrum)? I'm sure I read somewhere, maybe even here on mn, that trampolines weren't good for children with hyper mobility, you could maybe use that as a way to let her down gently without causing offence or seeming ungrateful.

WerthersUnOriginal · 02/09/2012 23:39

The point here is that mil is undermining you by 'deciding'. She should have checked with you.

I like trampolines though. Dc loved their trampoline and used it every day. But we've moved and the new garden isn't really lending itself to another one. I'm not sure where it'd fit Sad

InkyBinky · 02/09/2012 23:40

Trampolines are great fun if they are used properly. My DC's used theirs every day, I could not believe how much enjoyment they got from it. If they were not bouncing on it they were lying on it.

They are dangerous though and you do need to supervise.

ThePigOnTheWall · 02/09/2012 23:40

Crikey! Are kids not allowed to have fun nowadays because it's too "risky". When I think of the stuff I did as a kid, (stuff like climbing trees, making rope swings, swimming in rivers etc etc) you lot would have kittens!

ladymariner · 02/09/2012 23:41

My Dad made me a huge one when I was a kid, and I absolutely loved it, this was back in the day when only trapeze artists had safety nets.....we used to go on it riding Space Hoppers fgs, bloody brilliant fun Grin

Ds had one and he too loved it, although he and his mates were wrestling mad and we did do our best unsuccessfully to stop them using it as a wrestling ring.

Guess we were lucky as we never had any major injuries so I'd say YABU because it sounds like a great gift to me. However, it is your garden and your kids so if you don't want one and you have a good reason, not just dislike of your mil, then that should really be the end of it.

fishface2 · 02/09/2012 23:43

Yabu and wrapping them up in cotton wool. They are great fun for kids and adults. My dd has just turned 3 and she loves hers.

Backtobedlam · 02/09/2012 23:44

See, I let my kids climb trees, swim, explore, go on rope swings...I think that is a risk they can assess more easily themselves. Their own self preservation would usually mean they don't climb too high, don't swim out of their depth, choose a stick capable of holding their weight. It's different with something like a trampoline-the dangers aren't visible to a child.