To tell the hosts that DH didn't come to their party because he couldn't be bothered?

[bushymcbush]

We have been invited to a housewarming BBQ this afternoon. We've known about it for a couple of weeks.

This morning DH has decided he's not going. He says he doesn't feel like it. He's trying to make up for it with promises to do some housework.

It's not a coincidence at all that he realised this morning there is a BTCC race on telly this aft. Oh no.

So WIBU to not make up some crappy excuse for him when I arrive at the party without him, and just tell them the truth?

He has form for this kind of thing btw.

Tell the truth, my pals all know OH is a miserable get at times, they don't care. Enjoy the bbq without him, go home sloshed.

Plus I'm so fucking angry I could cry. We have a 3yo and a 5 month old, who I will have to look after at the party by myself, thus reducing my chances of relaxing and enjoying myself.

Get him to phone up and tell them why, if he lies then tell them the truth.

Leave the kids with him and go on your own

Leave the 3yo with him, and have a nice relaxing afternoon.

Arse.

Wish I could get sloshes but it's a 40 mile drive - 80 miles round trip which I also have to do alone.

OK, he either goes with you or he stays at home and looks after both of the DC's. His choice.

Leave the baby with him?

YANBU - if he doesn't go, then surely he should be looking after the DCs to enable you to go and scintillate to make up for his absence?

Leave one or both kidsat home with him.

x post with lots of people

Leave the children at home with their father.

Agree with five

Go to the party without him. However, say to him that as he doesn't fancy going, he can have the children at home with him. He'll then either change his mind sharpish or you'll be able to enjoy the party child free.

Ah, just saw you had the kids. what a shame. Do you really want to go? I have often been annoyed at OH and his ability to shrug things off when I am a bit of a doormat and generally never let people down. It's a personality trait, sometimes I wish I could say no as easily as he can.

Damn! i really need to learn how to type faster {grin]

The 3yo is already looking forward to going - I can't leave her behind. The baby is ebf so has to go with me.

I'd leave the kids with him and enjoy myself at the bbq!

Leave the kids at home surely?

X post!

Oh.
Well it's 1 - 0 to him then isn't it?

I agree with five too.

But I wouldn't be letting him get out of it so easily, it's really rude to commit to something and then not bother to make the effort. I think if you've RSVPd that you will go to something, then unless there is an emergency or an illness, then you go!

Yes I do want to go. Several of our friends are going to be there.

My DH tries this on sometimes. He is madly sociable, but only when he wants to be.

I've given up making excuses for him, so just tell him that I'm going to tell the truth - that he can't be bothered because he doesn't like them that much. He usually drags himself along and ends up enjoying himself.

80 mile round trip?!? Tell him to grow up, do NOT let him stay home alone.