to ask what is the biggest sacrifice you've made for your family?

[dubbada]

what have you sacrficed, or what would you be willing to sacrifice?

My dh has made sacrifices, his career is on its arse, mainly due to him having to look after me so much, bipolar, schizophrenia and psychosis... its been hard, his own MH is suffering because of me. He has always been the more active parent, done all the nights for all three as i am on sedatives, as well as work full time and muck in with house work... its not his failings, its not mine either....its life.

Haven't read the whole thread but here are my sacrifices....

My 34 DD's - now saggy 38 E

My waistline - can't lose weight as easily as before.

My stomach - now have 2 large surgery scars from a pregnancy that resulted in no baby

My memory - baby brain is true, god damn it!!!

Social life - my raving/festival days are over, I'm a light weight these days.

Tolerance of alcohol - see above

Can't say my fanjo because I had stitches after DD. I'm tighter than I was before

The ability to walk and a life free from chronic pain.

It is what it is, and my daughter is the miracle that she is. There's no connection between the two really. And let's be honest. None of us have 'sacrificed' these things - we put up with various challenges in order to be a mother. We played the game and we won.

My peace of mind.

This thread is both funny and a bit depressing.

My lovely flat tum is no more and my boobs aren't what they were. My DH said that you can't make an omelette without breaking eggs. I am not sure if that helped.

I don't feel as if I've sacrificed anything per se but I do feel a little lost at the moment. I'm not sure who I really am anymore, other than DD's mummy. I'm not sure what I like, what I want or what I'm about.

Thankfully, my fanjo is un-fucked, due to a c-sec and also in a literal sense in that DH and I are somewhat sporadic with our sex-life. Sigh.

And, because of pregnancy complications, not one person, NOT ONE, even looked at my fanjo during my pregnancy . . . except to put the catheter in I suppose. Oh. That wasn't a sacrifice, was it?

And my memory. Not what it was before DD.

What's this thread about, again?

Well, perhaps some people think the sacrifice was worth it; I don't. I wouldn't give up my children because that would do them immeasurable damage, and that wouldn't be fair on them - I chose to have them so now I have to live with it. I do love them very very much, they are amazing little people and I can't wait to see how they turn out. I would also give my life to protect them.

But if I would somehow 'undo' them, I would. I would so much rather be single and child-free. Sadly I didn't realise that until I was married with 2 kids, and there's no going back.

A large portion of my disposable income..
I have wide hips now, I was always a bit 'hippy' but now I hate them :(
My bond with dh has weakened since ds came along as I have found it hard to give them equal parts of myself, and dh loses out :( I hope to rectify this, but don't know where to start..
My time! I often wonder what I did with myself pre-ds...

However I feel more at peace within myself. I didn't have the easiest childhood. My Dad never wanted to be a father, he was very absent and when I did see him he'd always been drinking. My Mum tried her best to compensate for him but the strain showed on her every day. I still carry with me this sense of responsibility for her. My ds is so happy and carefree and thats because of the childhood me and dh are giving him. I hope he never feels the weight of the world on young shoulders, the way I did.

my pepperoni pizza last night DS1 came home starving so I let him have it.

My original career and my body. Body wasn't much to write home about before DC, but after tis a blobby mess. Oh well at least it' reasonably healthy

The life i was planning and had been looking forward to.

At the time i was devastated. Now i have a life 10x better.

Except for the dreadful body- stretchmarks, saggy boobs, incontinence

I think if I had read this thread before DCs I wouldn't have had them.

I wonder how much of this is avoidable/ choice or due to lack of money.

And it makes me think that all those 'sleb mummies have had surgery!

This thread could easily be like the 'What have the Romans ever done for us?' scene from Life of Brian...

What has having a family caused us to sacrife?

Boobs?

Well, apart from boobs?

Pelvic floor?, career?

Well, yes ok, apart from boobs, pelvic floors and careers, what has a family caused us to sacrifice?

Etc, etc.

My career. Was all set to head off to Nursing college when I found out I was expecting DS1. I was 18 and knew abortion was not an option for me. His Dad and I are still together 18 years later and he has numerous siblings now.

I have looked at returning to do Nursing but it really isn't an option where I live.

I love my children and am happy with the choices I have made but I am sad that I never became a nurse. It's all I've ever wanted to be.

I think I have made lots of little sacrifices (like my boobs, lie-ins, being able to get up and go, money etc) for my family and during the tough times those little things get me down sometimes. But, yesterday hubby took dd out for the whole day so that I could blitz the house and then have a bit of 'me' time. I did the cleaning, had a bath and then sat on the sofa feeling completely lost. I actually text him and asked him not to stay out too much longer because I missed them both! When I think about it, the little things aren't really a sacrifice, just a trade off for something so much better

low level alcoholism! Three years since I last had more than one glass of wine on any occasion and I would very much like to spend a nice afteroon in a pub beergarden getting a bit tipsy. I'd also like to be able to go for a walk with DP on a summer evening, but we have no babysitter.

I can live without both of those - the rest of it is just one of those things - surely we would all have changed over the time it takes to have kids anyway? I stopped going out on the lash every night and dancing till dawn when I was in my mid-twenties because it wasn't sustainable with my job - not a sacrifice for me job but a change in my life.