to be a little suspicious of landlord MIL.

[SmellsLikeTeenStrop]

Sorry, this is long.

DH and I rent from my MIL. She bought the house for DH before we met and there was always the understanding that when he had a steady income that would enable him to take on a mortgage she would let him buy the house at the same price she paid for it.

This was over 10 years ago, DH and I live here with our DCs and we're now in a position where we can buy the house, but now the plan seems to have changed. MIL is very cagey when we try and talk to her about buying the house. In the past she's said she'll 'be fair' when it comes to selling the house, but she's also said that for various reasons it would be impossible to sell the house to us for anything less than full market value. We've been told that the rent barely covers the mortgage and insurance, but we've also been told that she relies on our rent as her main source of income.

The last discussion we had she was pushing towards us not buying the house but instead having our names added to the mortgage and taking over the mortgage payments. I asked her how much the mortgage was and she claimed not to remember.

She's not been the best landlord in the world, she's made no effort to update the house at all. We can't have the boiler serviced because it's so old there are no parts available for it - but she can't replace the boiler as she has no money. The house is in massive need of updating, the kitchen is at least 30 years old, ditto the bathroom. The windows we're fighting a losing battle with, we sand them down and paint them every other year but they're deteriorating more and more.

For a house we're merely renting, it's not suitable for us any more. We're expecting another DC soon and we're a bit squished as it is. If we owned the house DH and I would hang on here a bit longer to improve the house and hopefully get it to a point where we can sell it on at market value and use the equity for a bigger home. Alternatively we could extend and/or add a loft conversion. MIL is aware that this is what we want to do and has said that this would be fine, but that was when we weren't in a position where we could actually buy the house.

If she won't sell us this house than the only real alternative is for us to move out. I won't hang on renting a house that is too small for us, especially with all the issues we're having with it. Us moving out would either force MIL to sell, or to invest a few thousand in to the property before she could get new tenants in. Given the amount of work the house needs, I can't imagine it would sell very quickly unless she sold it very cheaply.

So, after this huge wall of text. AIBU to be suspicious of MIL and WIBU to expect her to honour the promise she made to DH but if that really is impossible for her, to give us a mahoosive discount to take in to account the years of rental we've been paying, plus the huge amount of money we'll need to invest in the house?

It would take very little carbon monoxide to overcome a baby. You need to get out before its born.

No, you need the boiler situation sorted before Autumn, ideally before the baby arrives, make it clear it's none negotiable - you could move quite quickly if you go for another rental property of a similar size/rent - if you are paying market rents, that's not going to be a big deal, pay someone to do the move for you. (not as expensive as you'd think) and get it sorted. I couldn't do a winter with an unserviced boiler and a new baby.

If you get into any discussions with MIL over repairs, she is going to manipulate you. She will come out with something you haven't thought of and devastate your dh. Better to sit tight, use the CO detector, and just leave when you're ready. (and then report her)

Also, I know moving at 37 weeks or with a newborn isn't fun but it can be done. Get a removals quote and ask how much they'd charge to do all the packing for you. It isn't always that expensive. Staying till after Christmas seems a long time in the circumstances.

And stop paying the rent, today. You don't have to say you've stopped, just "lose" your chequebook.

TeenStrop is basically due to give birth any day from now. I want to cower under the duvet at the very thought of moving at that point.

Well, at this point, she has more safety precautions in place than they had before. Or those previous students might have had. (MoreBeta's post about landlords who just expect to rake in money was pretty accurate, I think.) I think gas safety inspections have been compulsory since before 2000, at least. I wouldn't be surprised if that boiler stopped meeting safety regulations long before your MIL bought it, but the previous landlord didn't take health and safety seriously either.

Do you share connecting walls with the neighbours? If you do, could you ask them to get carbon monoxide alarms? It is potentially possible that it could vent into their house before yours.

You cant expect your MIL to take you and your concerns seriously if your actions shows you are not serious about it. Not moving, or staying on until after Christmas is irresponsible at best, but shows her that you dont really mean what you say about the situation.

If you can move, though, please do. My previous post might come across as a little blase, but I am concerned. That boiler might last another three years, or it could go wrong in a month's time. I would think, as a layperson, that it must be coming to the end of its life though, as it's heaven knows how old it's gone without servicing for ten years.

So when are you going to talk to your landlord?

Your MIL would have to put you on the deeds if she wanted you on the mortgage as the mortgage deed must reflect the title deeds; the names on each one must be the same.

I'm glad you got the carbon monoxide detector as apparently you wouldn'thave any symptoms because you are pregnant-the baby wwould be affected instead.

I really hope you get the situation sorted in a way that works best for you and your family, not MIL. Good luck!

I hear what you folk are saying, Christmas is possibly a liberal estimate of the amount of time it would take to find another house to live if we went the rental route. I'd still want to speak to a mortgage advisor first, I haf been looking at 4 bed houses and they are out of our price range (as indicated by how much can I borrow calculators), but earlier I looked at 3 bedrooms with a loft conversion and found a few that we might be able to get a mortgage for and they are in the area we want to live in.

bigjessie it was 1998 that it became law.

anairofhope She's coming over on Sunday.

badger, I hope so too. Re. mortgage deeds and title deeds and names, does that still apply if the mortgage is already established and somebody is added on at a later date?

If you do agree to buy the house (Although why would you) don't agree to pay what left on her mortgage. Only offer the price now less any refurbishments (boiler, heating, electrics and kitchen and bathroom).

"She's not been the best landlord in the world, she's made no effort to update the house at all. We can't have the boiler serviced because it's so old there are no parts available for it - but she can't replace the boiler as she has no money."

that is a huge problem.

you need to force her to sort the boiler out or report her - a landlord is obliged to service the boiler every year, regardless of how low the rent or how broke the landlord is.
she's breaking the law and putting your family's lives at risk.
FAQs here

nickel I'm actually questioning whether she really doesn't have the money. It would be ridiculous for somebody who has numerous investment properties to not have any money set aside for repairs.

wheredidiputit, I can't see her knocking 20k off the price, especially if the house is in negative equity. She re-mortgaged you see, I wish I could remember if this was pre or post 2008.

Can't you call out a gas engineer saying your boiler 'sounds funny'. He'll doubtlessly condemn it when he sees it so you'll legitimately be able to tell her she needs to provide a new boiler for you before her new grandchild arrives.

yes, I agree, Smells - it sounds fishy - it's her that's given that excuse

She has 'numerous investment properties' and presumably another one that she lives in. The rental income from these should be enough to enable her to get a bank loan for the boiler replacement.

And if for some strange reason she can't get a loan, then unless they are ALL mortgaged to the hilt she can remortgage against one of them to get the repair money.

But actually, a key thing for Sunday is not to get involved in finding a solution for her. She has behaved absolutely abominably. She wasted money she should have used for repairs-not just once, but repeatedly for years. She has an absolute legal obligation to maintain the boiler, so she will just have to find a way to do it. How is not at all your problem.

Can't you call out a gas engineer saying your boiler 'sounds funny'. He'll doubtlessly condemn it when he sees it so you'll legitimately be able to tell her she needs to provide a new boiler for you before her new grandchild arrives
that's right, he would put one of those WARNING DO NOT USE labels on it.
best suggestion so far, and do it before the weather gets cold, ie NOW

OP, I have just bought an CO2 alarm reading this!!! anyway....

just to say her financial issues are not yours

you need to discuss with your DH and make a decision really

she is behaving badly, but thats life, people are sxxt when it comes to money

think this is DHs battle too TBH

If you think you can smell gas (and you can, can't you? I'm sure you can) phone the gas emergency number and they'll send someone out to condemn your boiler today ...

Trouble is, it is apparently illegal to use a gas appliance that you know to be unsafe. So that would set everything off and you'd end up 2-weeks post-birth living in a house that was being rewired.

www.hse.gov.uk/gas/domestic/faqtenant.htm

On another note, have you discussed with your dh, what he is going to do on Sunday when your MIL starts crying and protesting that she loves you, wants the best for you, and doesn't know what to do because she doesn't have any money? Is he prepared to face this?

"On another note, have you discussed with your dh, what he is going to do on Sunday when your MIL starts crying and protesting that she loves you, wants the best for you, and doesn't know what to do because she doesn't have any money? Is he prepared to face this?"
What he should do, is she says she can't replace the boiler, is say to her that in that case they will have to move ASAP as he cannot risk the lives of his children (her grandchildren) by living in an unsafe home. He realises that she will have even less money then, as she won't be collecting rent on the property as it would be illegal to let it to anyone in this condition, so perhaps she should put it on the market when they move out.

Let's see how she likes them apples. I'm pretty sure she'd be able to rustle the money up in those circumstances.

Oh, and when she then wails "but I bought this house for youuuu", be sure to point out that it's really too small for you anyway ... do NOT be pushed into agreeing to buy the place. (It needs far too much doing to it and it's too small, it'd be a money pit.)

I agree with those saying to get someone out to check the boiler so they tag it as unusable. Then she knows there is no going back, no manipulation. It MUST be replaced.

Why not channel the indigation and confidence you'd feel, if it was a argument about children's car seats? If you'd found out MIL hadn't beem using a car seat for a baby, I expect you'd be both immune to her tears. Channel that feeling!

Whatever is discussed, I think the words "selfish", "greedy", "amoral", "irresponsible", and "criminal" ought to feature prominently...

That's a good response whereyouleftit, DH and I are planning what we're going to say. Part of me wants to string her along for a bit over the putting our names on the mortgage thing, just to see if he really does plan on taking all our savings in exchange for going on the mortgage, and leaving us completely responsible for the huge and expensive repairs.

bigjessie I'm going to re-read this thread before she arrives to max out my indignation levels .

tanith most definitely!