Is a BYOB wedding reception wrong?

[headisintheshed]

Asking this question on behalf of my friend. She's on a budget for her wedding and hiring out the local church hall but there's no bar. She wants to pay for the welcome drinks and toast by getting in some prosseco and wine and will provide soft drinks but is she being unreasonable to ask people to byob instead of a wedding present if they would like to drink?

It's not wrong, it's absolutely perfect! Means that I can drink what I want at a price that I want

You do realise this thread is 4 years old??

I think if you are hosting, you pay. It wouldn't cost that much and it's part of the cost of the wedding. If they can't afford an evening do, they could simply not have one rather than expect the guests to pay for it.

Guests won't want to cart bottles around with them all day or leave them in warm cars.

Hahaha, only realised how OLD this thread is when I saw

3 for £10 offers

and thought "that can't be right!"

My Dh family would love this. Actually I would do because I resent the prices in bars. My DH family have a habit of bringing their own even when there is a bar because they don't want to pay the prices. They share it out among the whole family though without a second thought.

I went to a wedding like this on a beach. It was fine! Nobody batted an eyelid. Weddings are expensive!

I'd love this. Lots of weddings are cash bars now after a certain amount of booze, so I'd much prefer to just bring my own.

We went to a wedding last year where it was 6 bottles of wine to a table of 12. We also got champagne to toast and bucks fizz after the ceremony. After the wine was gone, it was a cash bar. As you can imagine with 12 people, 6 bottles doesn't last long. £6.25 for a small red wine

I miss those 3 for £10 bottles of wine!

I would much prefer this to what's happened at most weddings I've been to where it costs about £40 for a couple of rounds. You get bankrupt before you get tipsy!

I think It's much fairer on people.
I would make sure I got some basics in, though just in case. A couple of cases of beer/cider, maybe some budget spirits. Would be awful if it went on for longer or some people forgot and it began to run out.

Id be very happy to go to a wedding like that.

I'd have no problem with a BYOB wedding. Would certainly prefer it to an expensive paid bar.

I don't drink alcohol. At some weddings I would have paid a fortune for a pot of tea, think of the tea addicts.

She could phrase it as a polite request for guest's to "donate" a beverage. Someone could be in charge of setting it up and if any guest particularly wants to drink the item they brought they could write a label with their names so that they can be sure to get what they brought. I suggest this as people tend to want to drink the item they specifically bring when it's a BYOB situation.

Fab idea. I supplied arrival drink wine with meal and toasting fizz. But had a cash bar. Last wedding I went to I spent 20 quid on a bottle of mediocre wine. Would have loved to bring my own.

I would give a gift too.

I think we had 2 bottles between 8 on our table. Thankfully 3 were kids

Yup fine by me, the booze can cost more than food, and some drink like fish so the £££££ add up. We had drinks on arrival and the toasts, tgere was a bar so people could buy their own.

I wouldn't have a problem with that at all.

SINBU. Perfectly fine to say 'We are providing X, Y, or Z non-alcoholic drinks and champagne/sparkling juice for the toast but you're welcome to bring anything else you'd like.' The only time I'd raise an eyebrow re: guests purchasing their own beverage is if a reception/evening do had an entirely cash bar, as in guests had to pay for even non-alcoholic beverages like fizzy drinks, lemonade, iced tea etc. That would come off stingy. We had a 'mixed bar' at our wedding - we paid for all non-alcoholic beverages, champagne for the toast, and everyone's first two alcoholic beverages via a 'ticket' system, then after two drinks it was theoretically a cash bar. I say theoretically because most of the people who don't drink, or who only wanted one, handed out their drink tickets to people who wanted one or two drinks more. Not very many people ended up having to pay anything at all, IIRC.

ZOMBIE THREAD

AUGH FCOL!! Who resurrects these things and WHY? The happy couple probably have two kids by now!

It wouldn't bother me. I'd probably take a bottle or two as a contribution to the booze kitty (if there was one) , plus one in my handbag for our table / DH and I. I'd still buy a gift as well. I hate paying for overpriced drinks at functions, and if the wedding is on a budget I'd see it as an easy way to help the couple out and say thanks for the party.

I've only ever been to one wedding where there was a free bar - apart from that one every wedding I've been to you get a glass of fizzy for the toast, a couple of bottles of wine on the table and then pay for all your own drinks after that. I'd be more than happy to take my own wine or booze, it wouldn't bother me in the slightest.