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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I think a friend gave my child gelatine in food

255 replies

yetanothernamechnager · 06/08/2012 22:49

I am very upset with him mum thinks I am being unreasonable

OP posts:
honeytea · 07/08/2012 10:55

"For me it is about choosing to make your child different" Really? Again, being vegetarian isn't 'different' these days, in fact I would say it's quite evenly split with children who are/n't vegetarian. Dare I say it... it's really not a big deal either way!

But it is still a faff when you are somewhere where there is mostly meat. Especially if the child wants to eat meat.

worrysome · 07/08/2012 10:55

I personally feel that children should be raised to explore all foods without restriction, allergies aside obviously. if they then choose at whatever age to follow their parents as vegeterian or vegan that is their choice it shouldnt be assumed or forced upon them though especially at 9!

notactuallyme · 07/08/2012 10:57

honey you are wanting assuming the child wants to eat meat. Loads of veggie kids don't. I am assuming that you raise your kids as carnivores - have you told them waht meat is and where it comes from - you would be in the minority if you had.

crescentmoon · 07/08/2012 10:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Stokey38 · 07/08/2012 11:00

Honeytea where are these places where there is mostly meat? I have never been anywhere there wasn't at least 1 vegetarian option and I have never been to a party where there aren't at least a few cheese sandwiches on offer. DS is dairy free (allergic) which believe me, is a whole new world of faff.

crescentmoon · 07/08/2012 11:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JumpingThroughHoops · 07/08/2012 11:01

crescent

www.meateat.co.uk/modern-slaughter-methods.html

BreconBeBuggered · 07/08/2012 11:06

DS2 (9) has decided to declare himself an omnivore rather than a vegetarian. He chose this years ago. This doesn't make him any easier to feed in meat-eating households, as he doesn't actually like any meat other than chicken nuggets. I'm getting a bit weary now of posts dictating that vegetarians and vegans should not dictate to their children. Eh?

JumpingThroughHoops · 07/08/2012 11:10

Can
I
point
out
again

Haribo only has gelatine if made in Turkey.

Thank you, my work here is done!

notactuallyme · 07/08/2012 11:14

brecon - i know - how does it fit with the mumsnet mantra of my child, my rules?

crescentmoon · 07/08/2012 11:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BreconBeBuggered · 07/08/2012 11:15

Only Halal in Turkey, surely? Not the same as vegetarian. However, as I pointed out way upthread, there are new Haribo products that ARE vegetarian (not just the Funnymix and jelly beans). It's possible that no harm was done, and we're frothing away about something that never happened.

honeytea · 07/08/2012 11:18

honey you are wanting assuming the child wants to eat meat. Loads of veggie kids don't. I am assuming that you raise your kids as carnivores - have you told them waht meat is and where it comes from - you would be in the minority if you had.

I am pregnant so no DC to feed yet, when the time comes I will tell them where meat comes from, they will go hunting with their uncles. I will feed them a little bit of meat as that is what my DP would like (he will cook the meat), I cook vegie food as that is what I was brought up with, it's cheaper and there is less chance of me making anyone ill im not a great cook My children will be omnivores till they decide what they want to eat.

Honeytea where are these places where there is mostly meat? I have never been anywhere there wasn't at least 1 vegetarian option and I have never been to a party where there aren't at least a few cheese sandwiches on offer. DS is dairy free (allergic) which believe me, is a whole new world of faff.

But why should a child have to choose from 1 vegie option? or choose to eat some cheese sandwiches if they want to eat a sausage roll or they want a fish pie? Yes lots of places have a vegie option, but most of the options are meat.

If a child wants to be a vegan/vegetarian then the parent needs to educate that child as to what has meat products in. I knew at 9 that sweets could have gelatine in.

notactuallyme · 07/08/2012 11:24

www.veggiestuff.com/acatalog/vegetarian_sweets.html

^ yum

''But why should a child have to choose from 1 vegie option? or choose to eat some cheese sandwiches if they want to eat a sausage roll or they want a fish pie? Yes lots of places have a vegie option, but most of the options are meat. ''

Honey, I shall give up labouring my point to you. They DON'T want to eat a blardy sausage roll.

honeytea · 07/08/2012 11:28

Honey, I shall give up labouring my point to you. They DON'T want to eat a blardy sausage roll.

Some don't, so they shouldn't. I don't think we should be force feeding sausage rolls to crying vegie children.

But what about the ones who do want to eat meat? Are you saying theat there are no children who's parents have decided that they will be vegetarian and the child wants to try meat? there were certainly lots of kids like that when I was growing up but maybe children of 2012 are somehow less curious/more compliant than those of 1992?

Stokey38 · 07/08/2012 11:29

Hineytea My DD knows about gelatine. And as I say I have never visited a restaraunt where there s not at LEAST one vegetarian option on the menu and generally the child friendly places have at least a few and we have never had an instance where she has wanted meat, she understands the difference and has never expressed an interest in eating a sausage roll or a fish pie and why would she, it's not like she doesn't have a varied, healthy and interesting diet. Again, back to my original point that (for us) eating meat / not eating meat is not a big deal. It's my choice as I feed them but I have explained about meat and she isn't keen at this point to try it. This may change and we'll cross that bridge when we come to it

Stokey38 · 07/08/2012 11:29

Honeytea even!

squeakytoy · 07/08/2012 11:33

"vegetarians constitute 7% to 11% of the UK adult population"

Not exactly the majority, or even anywhere near, is it.

honeytea · 07/08/2012 11:35

Hineytea My DD knows about gelatine. And as I say I have never visited a restaraunt where there s not at LEAST one vegetarian option on the menu and generally the child friendly places have at least a few and we have never had an instance where she has wanted meat, she understands the difference and has never expressed an interest in eating a sausage roll or a fish pie and why would she, it's not like she doesn't have a varied, healthy and interesting diet. Again, back to my original point that (for us) eating meat / not eating meat is not a big deal. It's my choice as I feed them but I have explained about meat and she isn't keen at this point to try it. This may change and we'll cross that bridge when we come to it

That's great! If your child was at a friends house and was given a sweet that may have gelatine in would you be anoyed with the adult who gave it to her? or with your daughter? or just think well she knew it might have cow feet in it is her decision?

Stokey38 · 07/08/2012 11:43

Believe it or not, my DD is quite capable of explaining she is vegetarian and asking if there if the sweets are vegetarian. If she came home having eaten a Haribo, then no it would not be a big deal. It's a sweet.

SDTGisAnOlympicWolefGenius · 07/08/2012 11:45

NotActuallyme - can I ask how you would react if your child did want to have a sausage roll at a party? Correct me if I am wrong, but I assume that you would allow the child to have the sausage roll.

If (and it is a big if) a parent refuses to let a child try something that is outwith the parent's beliefs, whatever they may be, then that is wrong - but the impression I get is that most vegetarians/vegans accept that other people can make different decisions, and that would apply to their children too.

Sirzy · 07/08/2012 11:45

Stokey your posts have pretty much said what most people being accused of "vegetarian bashing" have been saying though.

Children get to an age whereby they know what being a vegetarian means and can decide for themselves to what level if at all they want to follow that when outside the house.

notactuallyme · 07/08/2012 11:46

What i don't get is this persistent insistence that veggie children are somehow missing out, or that they have control freak parents, or that meat is some amazing thing they should be given, or that the veggie kids are all peering sadly at the carvery in brewers fayre etc. It's not that fascinating or weird a choice.
I don't question anyone if they get their kids ears pierced, if they take them to church, if they ban telly, if they force them to learn an instrument, or if they feed them bits of dead animal. What is so wrong to people on mumsnet about my choice for my children that it needs to be picked away at?
I don't understand the op - if my children unknowingly ate meat, i wouldn't be cross, if someone accidentally gave them a meat product i wouldn't be cross. if someone chose to feed them meat i would.

notactuallyme · 07/08/2012 11:48

SDTG - i can't really imagine that conversation - i would assume my child thought it was a veggie one (we have them at home) and would explain it was a meat one. If they were having some massive tantrum and insisting they ate meat? I imagine we would have had that issue come up already.
They know that when they are older they can eat meat; I won't buy it and prepare it for them.

notactuallyme · 07/08/2012 11:49

''If (and it is a big if) a parent refuses to let a child try something that is outwith the parent's beliefs, whatever they may be, then that is wrong - but the impression I get is that most vegetarians/vegans accept that other people can make different decisions, and that would apply to their children too''

Sorry, missed that bit. Yup. pretty much sums it up.