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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think most of us would struggle

194 replies

Olympia2012 · 06/08/2012 13:19

to facilitate our children in their chosen sport to reach Olympic standard

I look at these athletes and just feel the dedication to that one child and their training completely takes over the family. Mrs Daly,Murray,Tweddle etc, I take my hat off to them.

Dd used to play for a footie team. Just locally, but the dedication to just that was massive. Training,kit, getting to venues across the county etc etc. Dragging all the dc out at weekends. The expense! Petrol, food and fees.

I wonder how the average family would cope. Could you?

OP posts:
debka · 06/08/2012 13:21

YANBU.

Perhaps if we were sporty, motivated, ambitious types- which we're not.

Poor DDs.

CrispyCod · 06/08/2012 13:24

We have the facilities to train but we don't train our own. Since watching the Olympics I've been surprised to find out how many foreign athletes actually train over here using our facilities. It's all about money at the end of the day and they probably pay well.

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman · 06/08/2012 13:25

We were on the edge with DD for a while and it was hard going at times but worth every penny. Luckily we had a sponsor that helped meet some of the costs but the mileage on the poor old car? Ouch that hurt

freddiefrog · 06/08/2012 13:26

DD1 is massively into swimming.

She swims for a local club, trains for 6 hours a week and takes part in various competitions locally.

It's a nightmare to keep up with. I feel like DH or I are always driving her somewhere or sitting in a swimming pool waiting for her.

Her club want her to take part in more national competitions but I just don't see how we can do it. We have another chld who also wants to do stuff and we can't just dedicate our life to 1 child at the expense of another (unless DD2 suddenly shows a mad interest in swimming)

Not to mention the £ in fees, petrol, etc (luckily kit isn't expensive)

I just don't think we have the time and money to keep up with it to be honest

McHappyPants2012 · 06/08/2012 13:28

I would struggle.

daisydoodoo · 06/08/2012 13:29

freddie- i have the same here, ds1 is a fantastic swimmer and trains daily, but with 3 other children i just can;t get him to where he needs to be to further any career. such a shame really.

Original poster
Olympia2012 · 06/08/2012 13:30

When those young British medal winners collect their medal I always think of the parents. It's as much theirs as it is their child's really.

All that work, must be so worth it to see them compete. It's just the getting there.

My 2 youngest are taking a big interest in sport due largely to the olympics. I will encourage them as much as possible, bit as a line parent it would be very very hard to progress from county level I think.

OP posts:
Original poster
Olympia2012 · 06/08/2012 13:31

daisy that's such a shame isn't it. So it's not a case that our country has no talent.

OP posts:
freddiefrog · 06/08/2012 13:32

@daisydoo - it's definately a shame. I don't know if she has the potential to make a career out of it, her coach seems to think she does, but with another child, we just can't dedicate everything to her

creamteas · 06/08/2012 13:34

My eldest was in a swimming club for a while, I quickly realised I didn't have the temperament to be a swimming mum. Whilst I was organised and financially able to do the training/kit/competitions elements. I was not going to obsessively monitor and berate performances below a personal best.

My you-don't-have-to-do-it-if-you-don't-want-to attitude was definitely frowned on Grin

Jenny70 · 06/08/2012 13:34

I have a friend whose son is really good at tennis and is on the cusp of will he/won't he a pro.

It is massive commitment, he trains 3hr 4 times a week - and she drags the younger 2 around heaps. The time and exp is boggling.

He recently lost all his matches in a small local tournament, and I must say I did ask her if the family time spent on him is all for a hobby, rather than a career.... seems to me he's good, but not elite.

I couldn't do it, and with 3 kids I don't feel it's fair to change their lives (no hobbies of their own, no play dates) unless it's a real career possibility.

worldgonecrazy · 06/08/2012 13:40

One of the rowers didn't take it up until she was 19. Maybe DD will be a similarly late bloomer and able to drive herself.

Having said that, I'm sure that doting grandpa has already signed her up for the athletics, swimming, rowing and tennis clubs and she's only 2.5.

foreverondiet · 06/08/2012 13:41

I was discussing this with a colleague - wrt the fact that such a high % of athletes at private schools - I said it wasn't just money for paying for training also means to manage the training, eg commitment of driving kids around to all the training.

DD1 is a good swimmer (age 8) but have no idea if she could take part in competitions as she just does a once a week swimming lesson. Am I letting her down?

So the answer is no, I don't think most of us could do it...

shoveitinasling · 06/08/2012 13:43

I used to take DD to gymnastics and swimming clubs. She only did the more recreational activities but there were children there who competed. It did seem like a huge commitment - so many sessions after school so it would be hard for a working parent to manage. And you have to fit in all of that alongside the usual schoolwork (the kids would be sitting doing their homework whilst waiting for their next gym session).

I think it can be very unfair for siblings who might just want to go to the park after school but end up being dragged around after the competitive child. And also on the parents I suppose - having to devote weekends to the sport when they might want to do regular family things or have their own hobbies.

Original poster
Olympia2012 · 06/08/2012 13:45

I would be interested to hear from some of the competitors mums and dads.... A webchat would be good!

OP posts:
justpaddling · 06/08/2012 13:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Xabian · 06/08/2012 13:48

if you have a partner to share things with it is a bit easier

My dd rides and needs to be take to local shows etc and my ds plays county tennis and he too needs to be taken to competitions etc. I normally take my DD and my DH normally does my DS.

We are also both self employed which helps to be a bit flexible if we know the children have a big event coming up.

Is is hard though

scummymummy · 06/08/2012 13:49

perhaps we need more good pe teachers instead of letting everything fall on families? Mo Farah puts all his success down to his pe teacher, according to his wiki page.

freddiefrog · 06/08/2012 14:17

@scummymummy - I agree, PE in my kids school seems to consist of letting them run around the hall/field a couple of times a week (I'm a parent helper so see a lot of the comings and goings).

They don't have a dedicated PE teacher so I guess it's not easy, but I was taught netball, cricket, rounders at primary school (which was a normal state, standard primary). We went swimming once a week in a local school's pool.

It got more serious once we got to secondary school, but in our children's primary PE seems to be treated as an inconvenience (even in the older kids). 2 years get 6 weeks of swimming each year (this year it was DD2's class, next year it'll be neither), there are no school teams for anything (I remember playing netball against other local schools, and my brother played football)

I offered to run an afterschool netball club, and DH is a properly qualified youth football coach and offered to do an afterschool club but they didn't take us up on the offer.

We have a lovely playing field, with a long jump pit, all marked out with a running track, etc, but the only action it sees is the summer fete

TantrumsAndOlympicGoldBalloons · 06/08/2012 14:28

It's bloody hard.
I have 3 DCs who play football for different teams, one is at a professional academy.
Between the 3 of them, there is training or a match every single evening of the week and also at weekends.

Not to mention the cost of football boots, astro boots, waterproofs, the registration fees, the academy fees, the petrol to get them there, the standing in rain and snow watching them, the pre season competitions on the other side of London.

I think if yOu actually sit down and think about it, you would think its impossible but we have been doing this for the last 7 years :(

redwhiteandblueeyedsusan · 06/08/2012 14:29

I need a lie down in a darkened room at the thought.

Virgil · 06/08/2012 14:35

I think children at private schools have an advantage. Many of them dedicate a vast amount of time to sport. My DSs go to a school where there are an astonishing number of brilliant sportsmen (boys). They do sport of some kind every single day, four times a week in the curriculum plus lunchtime and after school sports clubs.

Original poster
Olympia2012 · 06/08/2012 15:26

Blimey tantrums!! That's dedication

OP posts:
TeWiDoesTheHulaInHawaii · 06/08/2012 15:35

It's hard isn't it - I was thinking about 'inspire a generation' over the last few days... I think parents need to be inspired too, need to see that it's worth it.

TantrumsAndOlympicGoldBalloons · 06/08/2012 15:40

Dedication or stupidity, not sure which one yet :)

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