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Original poster

They ruined our wedding day. Very long rant/story

131 replies

inlawsfromhell · 26/07/2012 16:57

My SIL, MIL and BIL ruined our wedding day!!!! It was a small wedding with only 30 guest. SIL wasn't invited as two weeks after my daughter was born (4 years ago) she started a fight with me and threatened to kill me and our daughter and I have been receiving abuse every few months. My husband told her she wasn't invited.

So I arrived at the venue and who do I see SIL i tell my husband to get rid of the physco but he begs me to have her stay and i do it for him but tell him she isn't coming to the party. She was told to sit at the back she sat in the middle and what could I do walking down the isle. His mother who has only made the effort to see her grandchildren 4 times in 4 years, came up to me just before I walk down the isle screaming abuse at me for not inviting her daughter who threatened to kill her own niece and how DH has only got them. Well I lost it and told her how he only sees them because I ask him to visit and call them (I won't allow the DC around them without me), How her granddaughters don't know who she is and when she does visit she doesn't play with them just sits in a chair ignoring them arms crossed with a face on and that his children and me have been a family for 5 years.

We had no group photographs just our two girls and my niece and nephew. Because he couldn't tell his sister not to be in the pictures.

He left after we left the building, He went to find them and left me for 20 minutes! I was stood there like some idiot surrounded by everyone like I'd just been abandoned and nobody knew what to say to me.

When he came back we set off to the party his mother refused to come if SIL couldn't come. BIL came up to me gave me hug and said he wasn't coming.

The party was great till my husband got a text from SIL slagging me off calling me a tramp and saying i looked like shite he shouldn't have shown it to me I burst into tears. On my wedding day and my husband didn't even come and talk to me it was my sister. After an hour I come back to the party and thats the end of our wedding day.

In the morning I get up to find abuse from MIL and SIL. MIL calling me so many names in a text to DH and ending it LOVE MUM XXXX as if nothing has happened! and SIL facebook message to my account I shall C&P

"You are a fucking discrace u looked horrible an u all looked liked u just got out bed, say summat like that to my mum an upset u dnt do. The whole wedding was a sham an so fake, u didnt mean them words atall, i sed i wanted to kill you i rearlly am considering it now u scruff , if u ever come to manchester i will hunt u dwn u fucking whore, ur face is already a mess but wen ive finished with you it might be a fuvking improvement. Hot u rot in hell u are one nasty evil fucked up women. An making my brothers life a misery an he knows it an dnt know why he going along with you coz uve fucking brainwashed him prob, watch ur back coz i may just be in sheffield an see you an if i do u best run coz i fucking strangle youu fucking bitch. Never go near my mum agen. Hope ur happy uve messed up roys life an made all his family uncomfortable. U dnt fucking scare me now fuck off."

BIL was his best man didn't do anything for the stag do didn't even turn up, was on the train with SIL didn't tell us she was coming and didn't come to the party! Also got a group white card from all three saying "have a long and happy marriage like me and your dad" the weren't not happy and separated two years before he died. So they planned to ruin his wedding day and the sad thing is they only think they are hurting me!

I'm so pissed off I'm still crying randomly it's been nearly a week my husband has told me he'll never see SIL or MIl again but he has said this before because of the trouble they cause. We go on our honeymoon in a few day's and I don't want to go. I feel bad for my husband but I just can't get over this feeling (I can't even think of the word). I will leave my husband the day he talks to his sister or mother again because I have taken it for years and can't do it anymore.

Sorry about any spelling mistakes and my grammar. Its so long I'm sorry again

OP posts:
Original poster
inlawsfromhell · 28/07/2012 14:29

She has a child as I say some people shouldn't have children especially as they are people that can not have children and would make great parents. I know that MIL wanted to foster I shall be straight on the phone to the social services after we said we wanted to adopt an older child with a very small chance of been adopted. We have to wait a few years as the child we adopt has to be two years younger than our youngest. We wanted a child aged 5+

MIL wanted to foster for easy money her own words lol I come from a caring family that adopt and foster and this was something me and DH felt strongly about. But now I don't think I could put a child in this position. I don't want more blood children as there are plenty of children in the UK that need a forever home where they would be loved and treated the same. This has always been something I have wanted to do but don't feel like I could with his so called family. WOW what a babble (sorry)

I'm fine now just need to get this police visit over with and I won't feel like such a bitch for reporting her yes I feel bad for reporting even after everything she has done me and DH. I spoke to DH and he was in shook because I was doing it Hmm. It's not about me Its about my children and if she thinks like her mother about fostering for easy money

OP posts:
50shadesofslapntickle · 28/07/2012 19:13

Don't let them put you off your dream of fostering etc. You are not going to see them anymore are you? I hope the police visit went well and I hope she craps her pants when they visit her.

Stay away from them - get orders out against all of them and just keep away.

Fluffycloudland77 · 28/07/2012 19:39

Dont let them put you off pressing charges, they did that to us and we still regret it.

DH's ex was cautioned for abuse by text message.

50shadesofslapntickle · 31/07/2012 06:57

Any update op?

carycach · 31/07/2012 10:14

i think there are 2 sides to this and I can't help thinking we are only getting one here.
Of course what the family did at the wedding is unforgiveable but there must be a reason they hate you so much?

You said before the baby was born she bought her 4 full bags of baby clothes and you were cross with her for that.That sounds very ungrateful.If as you say she ithinks your DD is her DD then I think she is deranged deserves and needs help and pity.

Original poster
inlawsfromhell · 26/07/2013 17:50

OP HERE

Thought I'd update you all now it's been a year. DH hasn't spoke to or seen them for a year now and after the first few months of pain and hurt it's never been better. He still gets the odd txt off them going from cheery, emotional blackmail to abuse then the chain continues, they aren't txting as much any more so it's slowly dieing down and they can't call him as it goes straight to voice mail (He cant block them (O2) and needs his number for work). He talks to his brother every now and then (Still hate him, lol) luckily his working in some camping site in France so I don't have to see him.

We'll be moving house in a few weeks just waiting for a completion date.

I feel so much better and will never be able to thank enough you all for your support I don't know how I would of got through it all without your help. Feels great to be back to my strong self again, never again will I tolerate anything that causes my family to be in pain for the sake of keeping the peace.

Thank you again MN Smile

OP posts:
Nancy66 · 26/07/2013 17:58

Now that it's all water under the bridge OP.....any chance of seeing your wedding video?

Sounds like a corker.

pigletmania · 26/07/2013 18:03

My goodness thy sound vile. Iwoukd seriously have another wedding just you both abroad and make some new happier memories

CaptainSweatPants · 26/07/2013 18:03

Thanks for updating op

So glad things are much better for you & Dh

Original poster
inlawsfromhell · 26/07/2013 18:13

Would love to share the video in a few years when we get remarried Wink

Been on MN ever since, it's annoying not to get an update and been meaning to update for a while but thought I'd wait a year a anniversary present to you all Grin

OP posts:
Pigsmummy · 26/07/2013 18:17

I also say go the police with the threat and get an injunction banning her on going near you and a no contact order. Should be straight forward using that message.

This didn't ruin your wedding day, you still got married and are about to go on honeymoon, enjoy this special time x

expatinscotland · 26/07/2013 18:20

Why did you marry a man who allows his thug family to abuse you like this?

ArgyMargy · 26/07/2013 18:31

Well done, OP! And it's great to get the update - wish people did that more often (or maybe they do & I've missed it!). Hope everything continues to improve for you all.

SofaKing · 26/07/2013 19:02

Well done, so glad you won't be seeing them again after what they did.

But if toxic sil gets married, do be sure to go to her wedding. Preferably in a giant white dress, and insist on being in all the photos. If challenged, protest that you thought that this is how their family does weddings.

itsallshitandmoreshit · 26/07/2013 19:07

Your new DH should be protecting you from some of this but he's stirring it. I'm more concerned about his lack of care for you.
His family are nuts and dangerous. Fact.
He has chosen to love and protect you from harm. Debatable.

ProphetOfDoom · 26/07/2013 19:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MammaTJ · 26/07/2013 19:29

Wow, good for you. Happy Anniversary.

ImperialBlether · 26/07/2013 19:32

Laughing at Spuddy's "gusset of cunts."

RoxyFox211 · 26/07/2013 19:48

Take the message to the police hun. If your dh can't understand why that upsets you and feel the need to protect you a bit then your better off without all of them.

Pigsmummy · 26/07/2013 20:03

Sorry I missed the update. Happy anniversay OP x

LilacPeony · 26/07/2013 20:17

I think for the sake of your sanity you need to change your phone number and email address and FB account and move to somewhere where they won't know where you are. Cut all contact.

SixPackWellies · 26/07/2013 20:20

Good for you, OP.

:)

LilacPeony · 26/07/2013 20:56

Sorry I thought I had read all your posts, but somehow missed your latest update. Glad things have improved for you OP

raisah · 26/07/2013 21:09

Straight to the police with her rant and I would love to see her trying to talk herself out of this one. She is very stupid to put a threat to kill on facebook and with her previous behaviour the police shouldn't let it go lightly.
Definitely take it to the police and get a restraining order put out on your SIL & MIL.

ShirazSavedMySanity · 26/07/2013 22:01

I think you need to contact Jermey Kyle. He'd have a great show with all this