Afternoon naps

[cheekypickle]

Another weekend and DH is having yet another afternoon nap. He did let me lie in until 9:30.

What would you guys do with DD for 4-5 hours on a Sunday afternoon??

He's Really good with DD.

I'm the one that gets anxious. I was a really good mum before I got bi polar, then I became all anxious. I don't really have any friends with babies so mumsnet is good for advice

But have you told him cheeky ?(sorry for name mix up earlier, I'm terrible for it) Does he know how you feel about him sleeping all day, and about your wider insecurities? Did you think about him being there while you met with a CPN?

What's CPN?

A community psychiatric nurse :)

No I'm not in contact with one

Ah..I thought you were hinting at a namechange or something formerly.

Do you see an outpatient team from the hospital? Or are you just back seeing your GP?
It could be worth requesting to see one if you are still connected to the hospital. They can give great support, and help to communicate to your dp how important his support is to you, in case he didn't already know.
It's just that you seem to be really lacking in confidence, especially about your parenting, and you might do with a bit more support for a short while?

No holyshow I'm just crap with names, even when they are right in front of me

OK, but MN is not real life and yes, is good for advice but is an online world.

You need to make some real friends with real babies - there are so many groups, I've posted this before to you, Call your children's centre, HV, google, there will be stuff at weekends and your childminder will know where to find them.

You'll have to be brave Cheeky and say to other mums, would you like a coffee etc and if they say no, fuck them and find someone who will, someone will. Go to the library, be nosy, get out there and see what's out there.

Netmums has a meet a mum board - post on there: www.netmums.com/local-to-you/local-meet-a-mum and when dd goes to nursery, school etc it will all pick up and you'll be thinking 'Oh no, more chatting bollox about Jim/John's sleeping/eating habits with all the mums!"

I'm sorry but your daughter needs you. Don't waste all your time on here (it is great MN) but you need to work on you and real life and be happy and confident that you are a great mum and confident in spending time with her alone, without posting what to do to fill an afternoon with dd.

Your husband may be great with dd, but sounds bone fucking idle and unless someone is (god forbid) ill, no excuse whatsoever for 4/5 hour naps in the afternoon.

Change it now, he's doing it because he can. Don't stand for it.

You are also a teacher, so you must have some friends from work too, who will be off in the summer holidays, that you could meet up with.

Do you have any siblings?

Yes 2 sisters. I just need to stop being so needy and unconfident

Come on, think postive rather than negative.

"I need to be more independant and confident" is what you have to say... :)

You can do it.

I had a baby more because he wanted one

I do really love her. I wish I hasn't of got bi polar as a result of giving birth

its only 30 minutes difference between the time she had a lay in and he was up with the children. so its hardly parental avoidance seeing as he was up with his kids bright and early while the op slept for 3 1/2 hours

so you can either suck it up or get up with your dh and kids and tell him he cant nap.

I'd rather sleep in!

but cheeky you probably would have been diagnosed with bi-polar disorder, even without having a baby. Perhaps having her presented the symptoms a little earlier but it's not just because you had a baby. Do you think you blame the baby or your husband because he wanted the baby for your disorder?
I really think you need more rl support. It's not a matter of stopping being needy, it's ok to need a hand, I know I did, but it's keeping healthy and happy for you and your family.
Will you think about talking to your husband or your mum, seeing your consultant or GP, finding out about a CPN?

I use to blame my little one. I know now that that's a silly way to think and that it's not her fault

I remember the old thread. Can you tell me why you both need 12 hours sleep a day? You sleep 9-10pm - 9.30am. He sleeps 9-10pm - 6am then a 4-5 hours nap. Surely it must be medical...

That's only at weekends

I understand people with bi-polar often need extra sleep. I know my BIL will crash for a whole day if he had a heavy day the day before. So I fully understand your need for a lie in OP. What excuse has your partner got for these huge afternoon naps?

Yes the medication has made me really sleepy in the morning, I find it hard to get going.
I always used to be able to get up early

what about when you're in work cheeky?

I'll just have to push myself. I'm going back part time 3 days a week. Other 2 days with DD

So there is a medical reason for your extra sleep. What is his?

There is no reason!

Can I mention I've had DD all day, taken her to children's centre for a stay and okay session and I've not felt anxious at all. Looking forward to our days together in september