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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Afternoon naps

133 replies

cheekypickle · 22/07/2012 15:13

Another weekend and DH is having yet another afternoon nap. He did let me lie in until 9:30.

What would you guys do with DD for 4-5 hours on a Sunday afternoon??

OP posts:
Original poster
cheekypickle · 22/07/2012 16:14

Yes I take her for walks, round to friends houses by myself

OP posts:
FormerlyTitledUntidy · 22/07/2012 16:16

Would you think about talking to a CPN cherry? Perhaps even have your dh there for an appointment so he understands that you do need support? Do you think he is depressed too?

Original poster
cheekypickle · 22/07/2012 16:16

I don't think either of us are depressed

OP posts:
LentillyFart · 22/07/2012 16:18

You have posted extensively about your MH issues cheekypickle and had some kind and insightful advice from quite a few posters. Clearly you are not in a good place at the moment - and why do you keep posting on AIBU with stuff that should be on other parts of MN? Why are you not listening to anyone? What are YOU getting out of this?

mumnotmachine · 22/07/2012 16:19

Arent you the poster recently been in psychiatric care? Apologies if I have wrong poster?

FormerlyTitledUntidy · 22/07/2012 16:23

Yes, OP has recently been diagnosed with BPAD, I just double checked. I really feel she could do with a lot more support but it doesn't seem like she feels able to do that.

Cherry I think you should talk to your husband. None of us on here are able to help you if you won't take advice, deny there is a problem or ignore supportive posts?

mumnotmachine · 22/07/2012 16:40

Bi-polar is clinical depression isnt it?

FormerlyTitledUntidy · 22/07/2012 17:02

Yes, certainly one part of Bi-Polar disorder is at least a mild depression.

KellyElly · 22/07/2012 17:23

Just do what you would normally do with your kids. Its what us single mothers do every weekend :)

BertieBotts · 22/07/2012 17:29

That must be weird having a stepson who is 15. I'm 24 and have friends who are 16.

If you and DP really are that tired you should get checked out by your GP - it's not normal and it sounds like it's really affecting your day to day lives.

WildWorld2004 · 22/07/2012 19:36

I have been up since 6am (didnt get to bed until after 12 last night), have been out all day with a very active 8year old and will probably not get to bed until midnight again.

I think u need to kick your Dh into touch. You never do anything together as a family. You think it is fair to let him sleep for 4 hours in the afternoon. i dont think it is fair on you. He should be out of bed and wanting to do things with you as a family.

I am not putting you down, I just think you and the children deserve better. Smile

Original poster
cheekypickle · 22/07/2012 21:43

Yes I went through a depression. Still feel a bit anxious now but have had change of meds so hopefully that'll work. Ended up taking DD to the park and had a lovely time

OP posts:
squeakytoy · 22/07/2012 21:55

How long have you been with your husband CheekyPickle? It sounds like a very odd relationship, and I wonder if that is the root of your problems. :(

loveroflife · 22/07/2012 22:01

Cheeky didn't you recently post saying that your dd sleeps through, but AIBU to want her to sleep an extra half an hour either side?

I also remember one of your other posts saying AIBU to send dd to childminder all day when you are off work in summer hols?

Don't take this the wrong way, but i feel a little bit sorry for your dd, do you enjoy being with her? Are you giving her all the love and attention she needs?

Surely you know what to do with her on a weekend? Anything, walks, coffee, park, soft play, swimming, library - you're a teacher right? So, why would you post such a silly question?

I hope you're getting the help you obviously need.

P.S Maybe ease off MN a bit, it's horribly addictive and if I spend too long in front of laptop typing away stuck indoors, I am prone to feeling a bit down.

Original poster
cheekypickle · 22/07/2012 22:04

I've been with him 8 years

OP posts:
squeakytoy · 22/07/2012 22:17

Is your mum close by, could you go and talk to her perhaps?

Original poster
cheekypickle · 22/07/2012 22:19

I have. She knows how anxious I feel/get sometimes

OP posts:
Original poster
cheekypickle · 22/07/2012 22:20

Lover of life

I really hope I'm giving her the love and attention she needs.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 22/07/2012 22:24

So you've been together since you were only 17yrs old and he was 42yrs old?

Do you think he shows a lack of interest in the baby particularly?

brightermornings · 22/07/2012 22:25

Cheeky your dd is 11 months old so you've survived the first year (nearly). I think you doubt your ability as a parent and come on mn because you think everyone else knows what there doing. Well most days I wing it, sometimes I'm shocked I've survived that day. I've suffered from 2 bouts of depression and a divorce. Mn is good for advice but you need to listen to it.

holyshow · 22/07/2012 22:26

Who is cherry? Confused

squeakytoy · 22/07/2012 22:26

I do find it a bit strange that you do not do anything with your daughter AND your husband at the weekends. Does he have health problems?

That is a very large age gap, and you were barely a child, and he was already a middle aged man when you met.

I hope you dont mind me asking, but in view of the problems that you have got, and your posts on here, is everything ok with the relationship?

My stepdaughter is 5 years older than you, and I have to say, that if she had been in a relationship at the age of 17 with someone who was 43, I would have been very worried about her.

WorraLiberty · 22/07/2012 22:28

I wondering OP, is it possible he wanted to have a baby more for your sake than his?

loveroflife · 22/07/2012 22:29

Have you told him it is not acceptable to bail out like a fucking teenager and lie in bed when you have a family and he has a partner that is having to resort to posting on MN to ask what to do with his dd? (I don't mean that to sound as harsh as it does....)

Rip the covers off him and say 'up you get it's family time' and don't let someone say that a child has woken up in the night because of swimming that they can't go again!

Say, you're all going swimming as a family and no excuses. How is he with you and as worra says with the baby? What does he say about your anxiety and deeper issues?

squeakytoy · 22/07/2012 22:32

And no healthy 50 year old man needs 4 or 5 hours sleep during the day.

My husband gets up at 6am most days, sometimes earlier, does a days work, and does stuff around the house at weekends or we go out somewhere. He is almost 51.

Spending most of the weekend asleep is just not fair on you.