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AIBU?

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Original poster

Afternoon naps

133 replies

cheekypickle · 22/07/2012 15:13

Another weekend and DH is having yet another afternoon nap. He did let me lie in until 9:30.

What would you guys do with DD for 4-5 hours on a Sunday afternoon??

OP posts:
HecateHarshPants · 22/07/2012 15:48

My husband is 48 and he doesn't sleep the day away.

If your husband is in good health, he doesn't need to take to his bed for most of the weekend.

If you aren't happy - then tell him.

kinkyfuckery · 22/07/2012 15:48

Yep, that's it, ignore all the questions and suggestions, and instead tell us how old you all are! Confused

lagartija · 22/07/2012 15:48

Hecate I don't think they do anything as a family cos one of them is always asleep from what I can see.

FormerlyTitledUntidy · 22/07/2012 15:49

Hecate, I don't think they do anything together as a family. There is surely no time? A lot of us have asked that too.

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 22/07/2012 15:49

Why do you all need so much sleep, it is bonkers. If you are going to bed at 10, then surely you can get up at 6am? 8 hours of sleep is as much as anyone needs unless they have a medical condition.

Do you never go out for the day as a family? Your poor DD. She is only little now and it doesn't matter, but what a boring life for her - TV with Daddy in the morning and stuck indoors playing with Mummy in the afternoon.

rubyslippers · 22/07/2012 15:49

Why don't you?

It's knackering having young children but actually never doing anything, going anywhere or doing stuff like going to the park contributes to feeling even more tired and less motivated to go out IME

HecateHarshPants · 22/07/2012 15:49

Cheekypickle. Are you happy, love? Is living like this making you happy? Loved? Do you love him and feel that he loves you? do you laugh together? Do you feel like a family, rather than two people who live under the same roof?

FormerlyTitledUntidy · 22/07/2012 15:50

You went swimming once ?! Why not more? Why don't you tell your dh that you want to do X on Y day and that you want him to come with you. It's weird that you don't do anything together.

susiedaisy · 22/07/2012 15:52

I think op you both sound like you are still adjusting to havin a baby and not getting the Amount of sleep you were once used to, to go to bed at 9-10pm and get up 12 hours later is a phenomenon amount of sleep for a parent with a baby, and your dp obviously feels that he is owed that nap, this sounds typical of new parents that still haven't realised that those days of sleeping are gone, 6 hours is the new 12 hours for you both I'm afraid!

Original poster
cheekypickle · 22/07/2012 15:52

DD woke up in the middle of the night after we had even swimming..
DH blamed it on the swimming so we haven't been since. I would love to go again :(

OP posts:
Original poster
cheekypickle · 22/07/2012 15:53

Had 'been' swimming

OP posts:
rubyslippers · 22/07/2012 15:53

Just take her

You don't need permission

Was your DH like this with his son? What activities does he do with him?

HecateHarshPants · 22/07/2012 15:54

Are you happy with your life?

RandomMess · 22/07/2012 15:54

What did you both do at weekends before you had dd?

susiedaisy · 22/07/2012 15:54

Ah op that's just silly, swimming wears kids and parents out I doubt it had anything to do with it!

Crimebusterofthesea · 22/07/2012 15:54

I'm sorry but he is seriously taking the piss - he said that the swimming caused her to wake in the night??! Ah yes, must have been the swimming. He is making excuses and it really sounds like he doesn't want to actually spend time as a family.

Original poster
cheekypickle · 22/07/2012 15:55

He goes shopping with him.

OP posts:
SlipperyNipple · 22/07/2012 15:55

Well you can go on your own can't you? Or tell him to get his lazy arse in gear.

I'm making a huge jump here but does the big age gap mean that he usually makes all the decisions? If he does then you need to start pushing for what you want.

rubyslippers · 22/07/2012 15:58

Shopping - is that it?

I honestly think you need to do more

Even a walk in the park

Making cakes

FormerlyTitledUntidy · 22/07/2012 15:58

OP why don't you tell him that you want to do something?

susiedaisy · 22/07/2012 16:00

Ah ok I see your dp is 50, mmmm so a bit set in his ways maybe!

Did he raise his 15 year old son when he was a babe?

GnocchiNineDoors · 22/07/2012 16:00

How about setting aside Sundays as your 'nap' days? You get a lie in til whenever you want, then he gets his afternoon naps. Each taking it in shifts with DD.

Saturdays, you both get up with DD and spend the day doing things together.

PedanticPanda · 22/07/2012 16:02
  1. 4-5 hours isn't a nap.
  1. 9.30am isn't a long lie.

He's taking the piss.

FormerlyTitledUntidy · 22/07/2012 16:06

OP iirc, you're having a tough time at the moment. You seem to be very low on self confidence and esteem, and are struggling. You need more support than what your dh is giving you atm, I think you should talk to him about this. Perhaps you could talk to a CPN or counsellor if you have one?

mumnotmachine · 22/07/2012 16:09

OP do you feel able to take dd out by yourself, or do you feel you need your partner with you?
I know full well the impact depression can have on your life especially when babies are little- do you go out by yourself at all with her?