to expect a thank you card for wedding cash gift?!

[BlueMoon74]

Gave a cheque of £50 to an old family friend for their wedding (we didn't actually get invited to the wedding due to the size of their immediate family) This was 6+ weeks ago. I hadn't heard anything so was worried that they hadn't received it. Just checked online and the cheque was cashed the day after their wedding!

I think it's really rude that they haven't phoned or sent a card to say thank you! £50 is a lot of money to anyone, but we have a baby on the way, and £50 is a LOT of money to us! They've taken the time to cash it - surely they could have taken the time to say thank you?

Would I be being unreasonable to drop her a message on FB to ask did she receive it? How would I even word such a message?! Or do I just accept that she's cashed it and moved on?

I feel really annoyed if I'm honest! Maybe I"m being unreasonable?!

I ve just had a thank you for a gift given for a wedding in April. The reason the thank yous took this long, was they were waiting for the wedding photos, so that they could print one of them on their wedding day on their thank you note. Second instance I can quote of this happening lately. Might this be the case with your recipient?

Otherwise - you know they ve safely received it and cashed it. I d just tut and move on! People arent very good with their thank yous these days are they?

Yes, they should thank you - and it would be rude if they don't, especially as you know they've cashed it.

But six weeks ... well, give them a little more time before you get too cross. They may be planning on writing nice thank you cards to people and just not got around to writing all of them yet.

(We still waiting for a 'thank you' for a wedding present from about ten years ago ... I guess it ain't going to happen!)

YANBU but it took us over 6 weeks to send out thank you cards, waiting for photos and printing... Yes we were a tad relaxed about it, yes we got grief for it! Give them a bit more time, they're still basking in their newly wed joy!

Yes they should!

Only time we were asked for cash only we didn't get thank you's though.

I was annoyed.

(I'd give them 2 months though)

I have had a wedding present thank you about 7 months after the wedding, despite dropping a polite hint around the 4 month mark. I was really annoyed too. YANBU.

I think in the case of my friends, they had such a stupidly large wedding that they felt completely overwhelmed by the number of thank yous they had to send, but I still think it's rude.

I always heard that you have a year (yes, really) to do wedding thank-yous.

Disclaimer: we did not take that long.

Disclaimer 2: this was in the colonies, so perhaps not "quaite" as naice and refined as here...

My longest wait was a year. A whole year for a thank you. Like you it was a 'can we have cash?' for wedding present, which I don't really mind to be honest, but like you we gave £50 which is a lot of money for us to spend, so it pissed me off they took a year to srnd thank yous, and not onlybthat they wern't personal, just a photocard with general thank you that obviously took them about five minutes to order online and sent to every guest.

Bloody hell I really need to learn to proof read!

I did a similar thread last year - bride is a close friend so I 'jokingly' asked if she'd forgotten my thankyou card - she said 'oh we're not bothering'

Unbelievably rude - you are so not being unreasonable! I'd ask the bride or groom - not just the brides responsibility in my opinion.

Tbh, I don't think everyone does these days - I haven't had a thank you from my friends wedding, which was last month. Just accept this is what people are like these days!

YANBU

thank you cards for all gifts AND all attendances (even without gifts) is a standard wedding chore! It doesn't cost much and its very important!

"I always heard that you have a year (yes, really) to do wedding thank-yous"

I believe the year thing is that you have a year to give the gift
the thankyou should come shortly after, one of the reasons is so people know it arrived! if they don't find out it didn't arrive till a year later what can they do about it?

YANBU but I would give it 12 weeks before sending a message via fb, (just asking if they had a nice day and did they receive the gift).

We (or rather I!) took a while to write the thank you's for our wedding (maybe up to 6mths ), but I wanted the letters to be personal and tell people what we were doing with the money/gifts we were given.

That being said I don't remember my parents ever receiving a thank you letter from any of my cousins. I guess some do, some don't.

We married at the end of September, and lots of our 'thank yous' were sent with Christmas cards!

The worst we had was DH's neice, who didn't acknowledge the money we sent to her until around 3 years later, when she had had her baby, and wrote a thank you note telling us what range of baby clothes she liked!! The same girl who told her elderly grandparents that they would have to pay for any wedding photos they wanted - the wedding was on the other side of the world, and GP's are in the UK and haven't seen said GD for years!

"I did a similar thread last year - bride is a close friend so I 'jokingly' asked if she'd forgotten my thankyou card - she said 'oh we're not bothering" . Good lord, how unbelievably rude.

Not a wedding, but DP and I went to a 'significant' birthday party of a good friend about 10 months ago. We bought a really unusual and NOT cheap present. Have we had a thanks for that? Have we hell! They couldn't even be bothered to write a few words of thanks in their Christmas card.

It took me and MrK a few months to write and send all of our thank you notes. Once we were back from honeymoon we both had a stupidly busy period at work and as we were sending personalised notes out to big families on both sides, it did take a while. Is your surname near the bottom of the alphabet? Maybe you're near the end of the 'thank you' list And I wouldn't send an FB message - you'll look like a whingebag

I am one of the people who is rude, apparently. Our wedding was at Christmas and we haven't sent thank you cards yet.

In our defense, we have a toddler, I'm pregnant and knackered, my DH has had the rigmarole of reorganisation then subsequent loss of position at work, prepping for interviews etc etc I could go on...

I am grateful for everything we've received off people, but sometimes life is too hard and busy to stick to convention.

Hi that sucks....we only sent thank u cards to the big doners for our son's first birthday, 50 is a lot and u should recieve a thank u card- and if u dont, least u know not to repeat the good gesture

So YABU - it's only 6 weeks.

I would allow longer than 6 weeks. We finished our thank you cards 3 months after the wedding. Some gifts didn't arrive till then. Remember the couple have been away on honeymoon for 2 of the 6 weeks. They both probably have full time jobs as well. We did a few every night but sent them out together when they were all finished.

We got married at the end of October. Posted our thank you cards in the local postbox. Jolly young wheezes in the area put fireworks in the postbox & burned everything in it!

Sorry, YABU!

I would assume that they went on honeymoon for a couple of weeks. They are now probably back at work full time. That isn't a lot of time!

It took me about four months to write our thank you cards. I did it all myself with no help from DH and personalised each letter. It seemed to take me forever!

I wrote thank you cards to several guests (including our best man and family) for 'sharing our day' as they hadn't -even bothered to give us a card. Don't get me started on that one...