To think that the fact that 50 SOG is so popular is a bad reflection on women or at least the woman who like it?

[Jiggleballs123]

I've read all 3 of the books and they are awful or so many reasons which I think most of us here agree. I bought the books thinking it was going to be about a sub dom relationship and wanted to read some porn.

But what really bothers me is that so many women are swooning over Mr Grey. He is their 'fantasy man'. The amount of times I've sene facebook posts about 'going to curl up in bed with Mr Grey'.

To me he's an abusive partner with mental health problems. I realised this when he told Ana he likes to spank women (or in his words beat the shit out of them) because they remind him of his neglectful birth mother. Yet she still continues to allow him to 'punish' her. The abuse continues throughout all three of the books and ends with her somehow managing to 'change' him ans they all live happily ever after.

Is this really every womans fantasy, take a rich, controlling abusive, abused lost soul and change him?

there is no fisting in the book, it's a hard limit.

loving the book recomendations, i truley hope to find a passion in reading. Since starting reading i have not switched the tv on for myself.

My mistake, just based on a post from the first page. What is a 'Hard Limit'?

Countrymouse Jealousy? Jealous of what exactly what a strange thing to say. It's a perfectly valid discussion, I've said over and over that I am not a book snob but bothered by the message that the book gives but even more bothered by all the women who are in love with the abusive character.

Why are most people entirely missing the point?

OP I have read the first part of the trilogy over the last few days and just purchased the second. I agree with a lot of what you say, Christian does come across as a tad overly attentive and it is somewhat convenient that Ana is a pliant 21 year old virgin.

However I have to admit I'm enjoying it in all senses of the word. I have a latent interest in well umm BDSM. I bought Story of O and a few other similar works when I was younger, but they aren't the type of novels that you would share with anyone that you had read, I think its amazing that 50 Shades is so "out there" and that so many women seem to share the same fantasies. It's a shame its not better written and that Grey wasn't a little less creepy, but there you go.

Oh and by the by, other books recently bought by me on the kindle are I Claudius by Robert Graves and about 98 spurious epublications promising effortless weight loss so make of that what you will.

a hard limit is something the Dom or the sub will not do

This is a book, not real life. Nobody wants to read about a dude who goes shopping, feeds his cat and forgets to water his plants. What some readers want is a little excitement to provide escape from their own shopping / feeding cat / watering plant duties. The fact that this excitement is provided in a moderately raunchy book with a bastard as the main character does not suggest that normal women, even subconciously, lust after a similarly bastardly partner.

Approximately half of my colleagues (English teachers) are reading it, and insist it's not badly written. FFS.

But when a book or film thats about sex life/lifestyle becomes bestseller then a trend begins. Remember the 9 1/2 weeks? Everybody was buying fruit and veg after that. Thelma and Louise? Many women took a sabbatical and drove off that year. Sirley Valentine? Many females travelled solo to Greece that summer. A very popular book or film does set a trend, in this case a worrying trend- i think this is what OP is saying.

www.annsummers.com/c/gifts-giggles/50-shades#50-shades/?/=&page=1&pageSize=100

like this sort of trend lol

I take that on board, a fantasy, I agree we all probably have fantasies that we wouldn't necessarily want to be reality and for that the book is enjoyable. I could probably last with Mr Grey for a month.

But I do think that there is another slightly more sinister side to it. Women are saying that they've got post 50shades depression and that the book has made them feel less satisfied with their lives (see my earlier article post). To me this book is on parr with Katie Price and seeing her as something to aspire to.

Yes McHappy, and I think it's actualyl quite worrying that teenage boys are reading this book, like porn already hasn't done enough damage.

Sometimes I actually think it's best that these books are out of the mainstream and for people who actively seek them out and understand.

I don't really understand why it is so liberating as a female I've never had a problem exploring and expressing my sexuality and I certainyl didn't need E L James to tell me that what I like is normal and ok.

I have Always had issues around sex, the only thing I have got out of these books is to relax about sex and have fun. I am married and trust my husband 100% so it is ok to try new things

I just feel, from what has been said, because i can't get past chapter three because its so badly written, that he is a very poor representation of a Dom. I am interested in BDSM, I wouldn't find Grey in the least bit attractive, no way no how.

I certainly don't find the book liberating though - i am reading to see what all the whoo har is about, and pretty much like the da vinci code and the girl with the dragon tattoo - not very much.

But have you bought anything from the Ann Summers fifty collection?

Lucyellen to be fair once you get to book 3 she has stopped biting her lip.

Not at that price lol

You are right McHappy and that is the thing - you love and trust your DH, but would you want him to be like that all the time? i suspect not. A bit of BDSM play is good fun (believe me i know [preens with my new found trendiness]) but it belongs in the bedroom, with safe words, informed consent, love and trust. Not a contract with an emotional fuck wit.

The thing i can't get past is that she felt this guy had to be rich and successful, why is that? Why would that make him more attractive. Intelligent and considerate would do it for me - and yes, doms can be considerate, in fact it they absolutely MUST be considerate.

Ana would make a terrible sub, a true sub has to be of extremely strong character, self assured and confident. Otherwise it is a recipe for disaster it truly is.

LMAO at you judging the book and then suggesting i read all three

The only reason im reading the bloody thing is that mnet collaboration - it is better than the book though :)

Me, i'd eat Grey for breakfast and spit him out!

McHappy, if you want to read about liberating sex, read Nancy Friday's secret garden - it made even my face go but i thought, hey its ok to have fantasies about being abducted by aliens and used as a sexual experiment

Not all the time, and not every time we had sex.

I am my own person and could not be with a controlling man. I wouldn't want to be in a relationship where I could get hit if I didn't do something he liked.

I want more people to read it and agree with me!

With all these sex book I best get a kindle or kobo to save a tree or two lol

No, but a bit of spanking in the bedroom is good to get the adrenalin pumping i find. Note to self: stop posting on mnet when you have had wine! It sounds like you are having fun mchappypants :) I think i might go and wake sleeping not so beautiful, i can hear him snoring from here but well, a girl has needs

I am not sure what is is you are trying to say OP, i think you desperately wanted to not like the book but it is a guilty pleasure (the same way as i had a bit of a thing for simon cowel once) go on, admit it :)

Lol think I would need wine before I even start experimenting