To think that the fact that 50 SOG is so popular is a bad reflection on women or at least the woman who like it?

[Jiggleballs123]

I've read all 3 of the books and they are awful or so many reasons which I think most of us here agree. I bought the books thinking it was going to be about a sub dom relationship and wanted to read some porn.

But what really bothers me is that so many women are swooning over Mr Grey. He is their 'fantasy man'. The amount of times I've sene facebook posts about 'going to curl up in bed with Mr Grey'.

To me he's an abusive partner with mental health problems. I realised this when he told Ana he likes to spank women (or in his words beat the shit out of them) because they remind him of his neglectful birth mother. Yet she still continues to allow him to 'punish' her. The abuse continues throughout all three of the books and ends with her somehow managing to 'change' him ans they all live happily ever after.

Is this really every womans fantasy, take a rich, controlling abusive, abused lost soul and change him?

it's because he is really Edward Cullen aka Robert Pattinson imo

YANBU. Its dire, the characters are dire. Personally I would only find it interesting if I led a very quiet, dull life and had no imagination.

I think that you are rather narrow-minded if you think that the only reason someone could enjoy a book is because the male character is "every womans fantasy".

Why did you read all three if you hated them so much?

Can you not see the irony in the fact you managed to read all 3 of the books?

You can't have found them that awful!

Snap, Lexagon

ah, I won't be reading now, you've practically told me the whole story.

YANBU

i hate the books, i have read half of the 1st one and couldn't read anymore,

IMO the people who like them have never had a good kinky fuck ;)

That's some dedicated book hating!

I was just thinking OP

You might want to ask MNHQ to stick a spoiler alert on the thread title being as though you've given away the ending to anyone who might be reading it.

This is hardly a new observation, that people swoon over books without reading more than just the surface.

Don't you remember when Bridget Jones was popular? Lots of ooh I am just like Bridget. The whole point was that she was a caricature of a certain kind of neurotic must-get-a-man woman, not an aspirational figure. If you noticed yourself doing something that she would do you were supposed to feel embarrassed about it.

Here we are told that he is wonderful and beautiful and so people believe it. It doesn't mean that their ideal man is controlling, it means that they aren't paying attention to anything other than the narrator telling us how wonderful he is.

I'm almost finished the first one and am ashamed to admit anyone that tells me anything other than 'they're shit', are judged by me.

They are judged as never had a good shag or never read a decent book. Or both.

Who are you to define how (some) women's sexuality/sensuality is expressed?
Some women like an assertive/dominant man in and/or out of bed.

The books were badly written drivel. However, I "get" how the main protagonist Mr Grey, appeals to some women, and I for one, don't judge that negatively.

I can't not finish a book even if I don't think it's very good. I didn't hate the book in act I quite enjoyed the first one as an easy read with added porn, I didn't mind the sex bits although they got repetitive. The second one was the worst.

Sorry for the spoiler but if you open a thread on a book/movie etc surely it;s to be expected?

Anyway, what bothers me a little isn't someone enjoying the book but people who are upholding the female character as a 'herione' and the male character as their ideal man. He isn't an assertive dominant man he is abusive but the author has twisted this and told everyone he is a dominant man.

Happy fucking Days!!! First 50 shades thread of the week. Sadly not the last I'm sure.

You can't win op. I commented in a friends Facebook status that actually I didn't want my own grey as he seemed abusive as was met with 'well have you read it'

It is fine to like it if you know what you are getting into imo. I am sure many streetwise experienced women are into this.
The problem is that the book seem to apeal to less experienced/streetwise women. To do the s/d stuff with your dp/dh is one thing. To start searching Mr Grey on the internet is another, a dangerous game. Some of us have been in abusive relationships and know how manipulative it can be.

Sorry for the spoiler but if you open a thread on a book/movie etc surely it;s to be expected?

No not really?

Don't apologise to me. I haven't read any of them but with the amount of threads and Facebook comments, I feel as though I've read every bloody one.

I think the author and lots of the reader have got s/d relationships and abusive relationships very mixed up, and that is what bothers me so much.

The problem with the 50 Shades 'phenomenon' isn't that a shitty, badly-written book has become popular. It's mostly liked by people who don't read many books and have never read any erotic fiction at all, and therefore don't have anything to compare it to.
The problem is the way the media hype is transmitting this unsubtle message 'the perfect woman is a useless but pretty fuckwit who has nothing to offer but stupidity 'love' for the perfect man, who is a messed-up, abusive arsehole who just happens to be very rich.' So, women, know your place. What you really want is to be fist-fucked up the arse by a millionaire. That's what real women want. and if you object and don't like the books you must be a lezzer or a feminazi or something.

Eek I haven't read a word of these but feel like I'm swimming through conversations about them every day! Does he really fist her bum though? Ouch!

Actually you know what Worraliberty I take that back, I'm not at all sorry for the 'spoiler', as the ending is obvious the minute you start reading the book.

And if discussing something that has been discussed to death bothers people so much why bother reading about it?

I don't understand why so many posters are perservering in reading something they say is badly written drivel. Why bother wasting your time ?

I can't not finish a book.

Doesn't mean it can't be shit.