To not chase after the fucking dog

[paradisechick]

We have a little west highland terrier. He's 3 and a bit of a pain in the arse. I wasn't keen on the whole dog thing but DH convinced me. It's an escape artist. Since I've been on maternity leave (14 weeks) I've had to search for him no less than 7 fucking times. Once when I was a week of my date he got out of the garden, across the fields and some kind person had him in their garden.

3 weeks ago he got out and was in the field opposite, I had to leg it halfway across said field to get him whilst the baby was sleeping.

Last week I realised he was missing just as I was heading out. Cue a wasted hour driving round the town until somene called me (his number is on my collar) and I went to meet the man to get the dog back. He was really pissed off and shouty at me.

So, my DH assures me he's made sure the garden is secure (again) and this morning I'm hanging out the washing. Dog with me. I came in to make up bottles then went to get the dog in before I sit down for 10 minutes. He's gone.

Baby sleeping, we've got plans today and I don't know what the fuck to do.

The dog obviously doesn't want to live with us. I phoned DH, he swore at me, like it's my fault for leaving the dog outside. DH never walks the dog (as was agreed) so it's not wonder the little shit takes itself out for a run. I didn't want a dog. Why do I have to spend my days running after it?! DH is working only about 5 miles away.

Would it be unreasonable for me to get on with my day as planned, if someone phones saying they've got him I'll pass the number onto DH. Or do I put the sleeping baby in the car and spend another day looking for him?

Paradisechick, if you do take up Ditavon's suggestion of starting a thread in Doghouse for tips about runaway terriers, I'll join you on it. I have the same problem, and it's a nightmare. Part of the problem is the acute anxiety about the dog's safety as well as road accidents. I can certainly tell you how we've improved the situation, but I need more tips/ongoing help as well.

As a bit of a side issue, but perhaps to get your dh to take securing the garden more seriously, what would be the consequences for a dog owner whose runaway dog caused a major pile-up and people died? Worse case scenario, I know, but does anyone know?

This has been a horrible and very inhumane thread for you, OP, but maybe if we discuss it on a "tips for terriers" thread, some good might come of it.

Don't let the abuse get to you.

Anyway, thanks for some really good advice on the whole. I've got a lot to think about.

My dogs lying curled up on the sofa sound asleep dreaming of his run. I'm going out for lunch and having a good think about what to say to dh when he gets home.

I don't hate the dog, he's quite sweet really.

I think there's a liability part on the pet insurance.

It's reassuring to hear it's common for some dogs and I'm not the devil incarnate.

That doesn't mean I'm accepting the situation, before someone suggests so.

very inhumane thread seriously there are inhumane atrocities and acts happening all over the globe just now. This thread is not one of them

Interesting that the dog only runs away when your DH isn't home. This might sound daft but does it have 'separation anxiety' when he's away and wants to try to find him? Does he have more of a bond so the dog wants to stay near him more?

Or does he do anything different, like staying out in the garden when the dog is out there, interacting/playing with him more? Or maybe it's just co-incidence, of course - if you're the one at home all the time it's more likely to happen when you're there.

Agree about starting a thread in the Doghouse about runaway dogs. Don't have experience myself as my two are pretty much the opposite and want to be with me constantly (which can be a bit of a nuisance in itself!) but I'm sure lots of people will have had the same experience.

I understand the OPs frustration - my elderly father has a 'Houdini' collie and l used to often get phonecalls to go and get him off some kind stranger (my no. on disc). He usually gets out because callers seem to have a problem with understanding some part of one of my dads two clear signs 'Please shut the gate' and a handmade one 'Please dont let my dog out'.
In the end we had to put him in a gated area within the garden gate iyswim (Dad only has one garden and one entrance to his ground floor flat) and we had to drum it into Dad to never just let the dog out in the garden but put him in his' inner' garden and shut him in it if that makes sense as you just cant depend on people to always shut a gate.
It doesnt matter really whose fault it is - it would be the poor dog or worse some unsuspecting driver as others have said that could end up suffering terribly as a result. The fence issue does need to be resolved once and for all - there has to be an effective way surely of doing this ?

I wouldn't mind some recommendations on the type of garden fencing which works. An inner garden sounds good to me.

Sydenham, that would be a private prosecution for all the owner has got, if she's not got her dog insured for Public Liability. She's also commiting offences under the Road Traffic Act, which makes it an offence for a dog to be offlead on a designated road. If the dog were to harm someone or make them fear they will be harmed that's another offence and could lead to a variety of punishments up to and including the destruction of the dog and the imprisonment of the owner, depending on the severity of the situation.

Also, people on the Doghouse often talk about a book allegedly called Stop! written by police dog handlers, but I'm damned if I can find it any reference to it online. More info on said book would be great.

To look at the fence is fine which is puzzling. It's not like there's a gaping hole we're ignoring.

My dog used to do this and the final time she did it she didn't come back for 4 hours. Fortunately we lived in the middle of nowhere so there wasn't any major risks. After that though I never took her out without a lead on, and when we moved house a very secure garden was the top priority. (I couldn't secure the old garden because it had a right of way through it)

I think your husband has royally crapped on you.

He badgered for the dog - no doubt made all sorts of promises, and then decided sod it, I'm not going to. I've got what I wanted, I'm not living up to my side of the agreement.

The agreement was the HE would care for the dog, in terms of walks etc. And you say he won't. That's not fair. The dog is here now and needs walking. Your husband has behaved like an arse.

I think you should tell him that HE wanted the dog, not you. And that he either walks it himself or you will call the rspca and have them take the dog and ask him why I thinks it's ok for him to pressure you into getting a dog with certain promises and then go back on them.

(I am not saying actually make the call! We all know what happens to dogs taken by the rspca I am suggesting it only as a way of getting it across to your husband that he has been really unreasonable and lied to you in order to get his way)

Is he getting over it, Paradise? And before you say no, I know a dog of not much bigger than Westie size who can easily scale a 10 foot high gate, I've seen him do it! Thankfully he's in a secure area, always supervised and that gate is not the only one keeping him safe.

While your dog is untrained you need to take him into the garden only on a lead. A PITA maybe but far less one than receiving the news that he's dead in a road traffic accident and so are the family whose car he's under.

erm, terrier proof your garden and take it for walks! Our terrier also runs off and the last time he did it he got hit by a car. Luckily he survived but he needed a huge amount of care and surgery. It was totally my fault for not watching him. We now have a stake in the garden that I clip him to if I am busy in the garden and not sure if the gate is open. They do dig so I do sympathise but sadly it is your responsibility and not wanting him in the first place doesn't mean anything!

OP, try your local veterinary surgery. They may be able to put you in touch with a suitably qualified behaviourist who can do a home visit.

They usually observe how you interact with the dog in your home environment and how the dog acts towards you. When you say that the dog doesn't listen to you, it may be something which can be easily remedied.

Double check the liability on your pet insurance, a million pounds won't stretch very far if a couple of cars are involved and serious injuries occur. My friend's dog ran onto a dual carriageway and caused a small pile up. Thankfully no one was seriously injured, one or two whiplashes but it could have been so much worse. The damage to some very expensive cars was extensive and the poor dog lost her life.

Perhaps (I don't know your financial situation) you could get a local fencing firm to refence your garden and explain that you have a Houdini. They may dig deep foundations to the actual fence, or if he is scrabbling up the fence, you could get them to put something on top of the fence which angles inwards, so he hits a barrier.

The dog walker thing is a good idea though, sometimes they do group walks with other suitable dogs which would give him a little social interaction as well, it may stop him being so bored.

I can't remember if you said he's neutered or not, but it may be something to consider. Who knows how many new families he could be creating while he's out on his travels...

Terriers don't listen! I absolutely love mine but you have to work from the basis that if he can escape, he will. He loves me and the family but his need to escape and gaily run around after other dogs is greater than his sense of self-preservation .

Watch him in the garden and see where he is getting out, then fill it in.

My terrier isnt bored either, he has two long walks a day and comes to work with me. He only needs 10 mins unsupervised to try and get out though. I cage him if I am coming in and out and want to leave the door open for a bit, and I stake him if I want to hang the washing out.

Yes, long walks have no ameliorating effect on our Houdini.

To look at the fence is fine which is puzzling. It's not like there's a gaping hole we're ignoring.

Get a long, light line (they have them on ebay for a few quid) take him in the garden and he will lead you to where he's getting through/under/over but as you will have a secure hold of the line he won't be able to escape, then fix the fence.

Don't let him back in the garden on his own until you know where all the escape points are and they have been addressed.

(But I still think you should probably rehome unless your OH takes his commitment seriously and lives up to his promises.)

There won't be gaping holes OP. My JRT used to get through tiny holes.

Your DH must spend some time watching the dog in the garden, mine only escaped when she thought no one was watching so you have to pretend you aren't looking. The dog will soon show you where the holes are.

Dear me!

A Highland Terrier you say? One of those small dogs?
So if it was run over, how much damage would it do to a car?
The same amount of damage that a cat does?

As there are a fair few cats run over every day perhaps we had better call on cat owners to keep their bloody cats indoors in case their pusses cause an accident on the roads?

paradise chick Yes you do need to talk to your dh but when you are in a calm state. Shouting at him the moment he walks through the door will not help.

I get the feeling that your dh thought it would be a good idea but now he's realised what a pita it is to walk the dog, repair the fence, look for the dog, walk the dog, repair the fence etc and so if you play your cards right, he might actually be relieved at the solution to rehome the dog.

So very calmly tell him that you realise the dog is a problem for the both of you. That he doesn't walk it and it's not fair on him to keep expecting him to mend the fence. Equally it's not fair on you with a babe in arms to expect you to walk it and look for it. So as you both are getting frustrated with the situation and the dog is clearly not happy, perhaps it would be best for the dog if it was re-homed with someone who has more experience and more time for the pooch.

If you go in guns a'blazing you'll just put him on the defensive and no decisions will actually be made. He'll pretend to be devastated to get rid and will pile the guilt onto you. Whereas coming from a reasonable angle, it can be a joint decision made responsibly.

To look at the fence is fine which is puzzling. It's not like there's a gaping hole we're ignoring.

No, there almost certainly won't be. Terriers can be very creative escapologists. Mine can get through the gaps in standard stock fencing - his latest trick was to find the tiniest gap where the fence bisects and crawl through it and had I not hidden and spied on him I'd never have thought he could get out through it) and I have two rows of secondary chicken wire all of which is pegged into the ground. Plus fence edging. The top of the fence is trellissed which now has nice, thick, discouraging plants climbing over it.

I don't know what your fencing is like but anything that encourages a paw hold can be scaled quite easily too. Even by a remarkably small dog. My advice is to spy on your terrier (if possible) and that might help reveal the vulnerable gaps.

OP - no matter how sweet the dog is you have to do what's right for you, and ergo the dog.
I've had to recently rehome one of my beloved dogs. Luckily I know who and where she's gone to. I and her couldn't cope when I came out of hospital with my baby. She needed a lot of attention, both emotionally and physically, and wasn't receiving it. Within a week she was very depressed, and I do mean VERY depressed, even though she was being walked and exercised. I could have kept her because I and DH both love her but I did what was best for her. I've had updates on her and she's in heaven, a 10 acre 'garden' with a lake in it, which in turn leads down to a beach for her to gallop around in every day; the lady with her all day, every day; a puppy of the same breed for her to play with and mother; and 100% attention and focus upon her.
We've kept our other dog, not because we love him more or less, but because he was able to adapt to the situation and isn't as demanding.
She's in a better home for her, compared to how this one had become, the lady who's got her is over the moon to have her (she's known her for the past year and loves her), I'm happier, DH happier, other dog happier, baby happy.

If I were you I'd give your husband an ultimatum, to start walking the dog at least once a day & properly securing the garden or he will find the dog rehomed while he's at work.

Oh, and I would second the point about exercise not necessarily having any effect. Although a very tired dog is less likely to be bothered. However, you could walk mine all day and he'd still exploit any known escape points. Most of the time he doesn't know what to do with himself when he's got out and since he can never get back in the same way you are likely to find him looking rather bemused in the front garden. It's just the thrill of the challenge.