to move my child to another school because of PJ wearing parents and other things.....

[fiftieslover]

Hi there, your views would be appreciated.

My ds is currently in yr 3 (8 yrs old) he is in a mixed class of years 3 and 4. Since Christmas I have had really serious doubts about the school he is in.

He has asked to move schools a couple of times in the past 6 months and I am seriously considering it. BUT I know at 8 this is a massive change for him. He is a social little boy who makes friends easily and can articulate his thoughts really well. The issues I have with the school are as follows.

1. Parents dropping their children off still wearing their PJs. I not talking lounge wear here, I'm talking fullish sheep adorned pink things. I turn up at school dressed for work, smart and ready for the day.

1. Leading on from 1 is the reason for the PJ wearing. There is a very high number of unemployed parents in the school. I live in a nice part of not a very nice area IYKWIM. Unemployment has always been a problem. I have lived in this area for over 30 years and alot of the children in ds class are 4th and 5th generation unemployed. So I assume the pj wearing is because they have nothing to get ready for? I need to add that sometimes the children are picked up from school at 3pm with said parents still adorning the sheep attire.

I have never been unemployed so struggle to empathise really with the other parents. I work in recruitment and know there are always things you can do to improve your chances but I have never been there so know I dont fully understand the effect unemployment has on you.

1. There are ALOT of kids in the class that are morphing into absolute horrors. The behaviour is getting worse as each school year passes. Once lovely little 4 year olds are now 8 year old swearing, disrespectful kids. My ds went over to one of them the other day to show him his homework. The other kid looked at my ds as if he were stupid and said I dont do homework - I wouldnt dare!.

1. I'm aware this is getting long so going to cut it short. The teachers appear to spend alot of time on discipline - taking actual teaching time away from the good kids.

1. In the past out of 26 kids, there are approximately 8 that behave really well. If the other 18 are playing up, the whole class has been punished. This really annoyed me.

I could go on and I think I have answered my own question seeing it in black and white but would still appreciate your comments.

Thanks fifties x

I grew up on a council estate and I work for the Daily Mail now.....you don't get much more respectable than that

The recession brought a good few of the lucky sperm club down a peg or two. That in itself makes the banking fuck up almost worth it!

well, I don't think anyone is forcing you to be here.

But genuinely, if your feelings are getting you down, I'm sure there's plenty people who would willingly support you. It's hard sometimes. We've all been there.

((hugs)) It's OK. I don't judge you.

I like his blog.

owenjones.org/

No YANBU at all.

IMHO stepping out the house in your PJs is pure laziness. If they are well enough to leave the house to take DCs to school then they are well enough to make themselves look respectable to do it. It takes less than a minute to throw on a pair of jeans or even a tracksuit. My cousin is battling Hodgkin's Lymphoma and still manages to get dressed every morning, so she looks better for the sake of her DCs.

Move your DC to a better school where his fellow pupils are not too cool or too lazy to do homework.

So, to get back to the OP...

If she's concerned for her DC being unhappy then she should definitely go ahead and move him from the current school.

However, wearing pyjamas in the playground is not the greatest of social evils. Poor people aren't pre-disposed to lawlessness, and Owen Jones has a website.

That's what I've discovered so far.

No it isn't

I was the biggest pj wearer at ds school and I certainly wasn't 'poor'

So, Noddy (if I can call you Noddy?)

What motivated you to wear pyjamas outdoors?

It not something I've ever been tempted to do, so I'm genuinely interested. And it might clear up a few "misconceptions" on here.

I was ill for years on dialysis some days I couldn't do more. I was told that one of the women was telling people she saw me drunk on the school run as I was unsteady on my feet. At that time I hadn't had any alcohol in years. I live in Brighton so PJs is not that odd! I am mad on clothes and fashion but in those years I didn't give a toss. My ds is popular doing well at college and a lovely 18 yr old

It wont clear up any misconceptions pleasantlysurprised some of us have already explained why we wore pjs at some stage and it was just ignored.

When you see a mum taking her kids to school instead of judging maybe some people on this thread should consider that she is not coping very well with some aspects of her life and cut her some slack. It may not be the case for all pj wearing mums, but I'm sure it is for more mums than simply being too lazy and CBA as believed by most.

That's what I was thinking Damsel. If I saw someone taking their kids to school in their PJs I wouldn't automatically assume they were lazy. I'd assume they weren't quite coping. I know everyone judges people sometimes, but I think I'd tend to cut them some slack, and maybe even make an effort to chat with them in case they were finding stuff just a bit much.

I know I've nearly lost my sanity during the school run. I've gone out without make up, without brushing my hair, even in my slippers. People all have different things that aren't as important to them in the rush to get stuff done. And if it's the "done thing" to see people in PJs at the school gates, then why not? Why is it such an issue?

I think I'd rather have my kids mixing with other kids who don't come from homes where my every move is scrutinised for signs of being not the right sort of person.

It's also no surprise that it is the poor people (council estate) who crack under pressure either. While the well off sit in judgement.

I thank God I'm well off now, but I come from the gutters and I can't stand the lucky sperm club snobs and their attitude towards other human beings.

Sometimes I wore them under my prada coat

When I worked part time (f/t now), on the days I wasn't at work, I used to wear my pj top for the school run (I just like my bed too much) but I did always put on jeans/whatever on my bottom half and a jumper or coat over my pj top... /secretslob

My mum used to drive me to school in pyjamas, hidden by a coat, although she wouldn't get out of the car.
She would go home, do all the chores (ok she's a bit house obsessed) cook etc. Then throw pjs in wash and get dressed for the day.
She's one of the biggest snobs I've ever met!

Sorry this is not adding much to the thread. Just to say.

But in ops case it's different, and you have good reasons for moving ds.

Unfortunate way of putting it though....

And 5th generation? Is that a typo? Sorry, haven't read through thread if that one has been explained.

I'd move in an instant. Look now so that he can start the new school year in September.

PJs are for the house, not outside but its the bad behaviour, lack of work ethic and low aspirations that would worry me more. It costs nothing to raise children responsibly and to behave well so nothing to do with poverty.

When we moved from our house to a slightly less chi chi area in order that dp could give up work to look after me the same mum said when she came to collect her ds from play date What sort of people live up here? My dp said robbers ! I also had a drinks party once where she said she didn't expect me to eat olives . Unfortunately my ds and hers were close or I would have told her where to get off.

I don't think I understand how people adorn clothing of any type.

Are you aware that 'a lot' is two words? Well, obviously you weren't aware, but perhaps you are now?

You seem pretty ignorant for one so judgemental.