To not understand the need for a birth plan.

[MsKittyFane]

Surely you make decisions based on what is happening at the time?
I think it's important to educate yourself and have certain preferences for type of pain relief but why are some people so prescriptive?
Each birth is different and who knows what intervention your baby will need when the time comes?

who are these ''some people'', have you examined many birth plans for prescriptiveness?

I had a birth plan ... it didn't make it out of my bag at any time in the 2.5 days between my induction starting and dd actually putting in an appearance

YANBU. I never had one...just went with the flow...completely different situation each of the 3 times!

The midwives will love you! Three kids on I totally agree with you but I was that NCT indoctrinated first time mum who went into hospital with a plan that began "I would like as natural a birth as possible" and came out three days later having had a 17 1/2 hour labour, every drug known to man and an assisted delivery. I always thought the midwives either (a) pissed themselves laughing or (b) rolled their eyes and thought, here comes another one. In my defence I was living in Brighton at the time

Random
:o Yes, I've seen a fair few!

I didn't make a birth plan.

DH knew my preferences for DD's birth. And then she was an EMCS 5 weeks early.

Best laid plans of mice and men and all that!

perimen :o :o

emmah194 ditto! Only wrote it because the slightly crazy lovely lady at our antenatal classes was adamant we all should have one. IIRC, we all wrote about 15 versions of our birth plans to get them just right. I'm sure someone will be along shortly to tell you YABU though

I don't know, I think it's a good idea to go in with an idea of you want to happen, but also knowing that the unexpected happens and that plans have to change, iykwim? For example, if you really don't want a certain type of pain relief, then you might put in your plan that you don't want it and don't want to be offered it, so that you wont change your mind in the heat of the moment?

I had written in mine that I didn't want anything other than gas and air, wanted an active birth, specifically no forceps or scissors or epidurals etc etc etc. HA! (I don't know why I put the forceps thing down, it's not like they just whip the giant salad tongs out willy nilly fgs). Suffice to say things did not go according to my plan, but hey ho, no harm done.

I had a non-prescriptive birthplan with stuff like 'if possible I would like...' and the only thing I said I didn't want was 'please do not offer me pethidine' which they did and I had (twice) and then ended up narrowly missing a C-section and my baby in special care.

Still glad I had a non-prescriptive plan though.

Have you seen lots of people's birth plans then?!

I agree that an overly prescriptive plan is not a great idea. But many people find it useful to read up about eg various pain relief and then reflect on what they would prefer in a situation where there are options. Because tbh the majority of labours are medically 'normal' and there is a degree of choice about whether a woman uses water/gas/pethidine etc

I certainly found it helpful for ME (not just the midwife) to have thought it all through and to have put down in writing that I would prefer non invasive pain relief etc

I think it's about control.
Giving birth is unpredictable to say the least so it's planning for the unknown. Futile but makes people feel better.

tinkerbel as I said, I've seen a fair few! :o

Birth plans are like basket weaving. They look pretty and they give you something to do but they usually become unravelled.

I think they were created just to give first time mums something to focus on. I've yet to meet a second time mum that bothers.

I didn't bother making one - I also didn't bother going to antenatal classes.

tinkerbel your second paragraph is what was said in my OP so I agree with you.

I didn't write a birth plan to give to the MW, I wrote it to focus my thoughts and choices over things I could control.

They can be valuable as educational tools, they can be invaluable anyone involved is using their second or additional language. They're helpful for hypnobirthing and the question 'so you still want a physiological third stage?' is easier for both parties than explaining the options again to someone who hasn't thought about it before that point.

So YABU-ish because it's not so much the writing or indeed the sharing as the expectation that if one plans one will get what one has planned.

What do people put in them?

Beyond expressing a preference between being cut and tearing or having a birthing pool/ball. I can't really see what they achieve.

Surely birth is an 'organic' process that evolves and there's no way anyone can say weeks in advance what they 'expect' to happen.

rabitee Ha! :o

YABU. If the midwife tells you to fill in a birth plan, you fill in a bloody birth plan ffs. Why be so prescritpive about not needing one? Its all very well saying that "DH is aware" but my DH was (a) not terribly aware and (b) not actually in attendance at the birth. Clearly my birth plan covered this - yes I would like him admitted should he arrive!

I had a birth plan. Written in about 2 mins with my midwife. She basically said, in an ideal world what would you want to happen.

No epidural but pethedine OK if I ask for it.
No injections without my husband in the room unless in an emergency.
Plan to breastfeed.

All 3 happened despite emcs. It was important because my notes said I am 'needle phobic' which I sort of am I guess, but with dh I can have them as he keeps me calm. Think I would write the same next time!

I think part of it is so they know you have thought about and understand the kinds of pain relief available.

It may be unpredictable but its also a fact that most labours are medically 'normal' (hate that word but you know what I mean). The majority of labours have the potential to end in a vaginal delivery, and therefore the type of pain relief, how a woman labours (ie standing, on a bed etc) are open to a degree of choice. Therefore, many women want to express their preference, having read up about different options.

I can't see why that's unreasonable. Obviously any plan which states what is going to happen in tablets of stone is daft, but I would imagine most plans are about what a woman would like when there IS choice

wiggle I definitely plan to bother. In fact I've already updated and amended mine and DC2 hasn't been conceived yet!