to expect someone at ds's nursery to say hello on arrival and take him to see some toys

[mumtocuddlebundle]

I feel slightly put out by this and just not sure if I am being unreasonable or not.
DS 2.5 goes to a daycare nursery 2 afternoons a week. Its just a chance for him to play etc as I find it difficult to get out to playgroups with infant as well.
I drop him off after his nap, at just after 2pm. And sometimes when we go in we are completely ignored. Sometimes one or two of the girls will look up and say hello. But then go back to what they are doing. And sometimes, if one of the more friendly ones are there they will come over and say hello properly. But sometimes nobody says anything. I have on occasion had to go and say do you mind keeping an eye on ds to check hes ok. Cos although ds is generally a happy boy and drops off well. I like him to feel welcomed into nursery. And I like to feel someone is aware he is there, so he isn't forgotten about.

The other day I dropped him off and there was not much in the way of toys out to play with. Ds looked a bit lost and not sure what to do. So I said to one of the girls he was looking forward to playing with train set. And she said 'sorry its just the toys that are out' And didnt even say hello to ds.

Surely when I am paying £25 for an afternoon session it is not unreasonable to expect to be welcomed in by someone and for them to find a toy that ds is interested in? I genuinely don't know though, cos I am not used to this nursery stuff as this is my first dc.

That all sounds horrible :(

It will be interesting to see if/how it changes. I tend to think that if they are that disinterested when you arrive, that the care will be sub optimal myself.

Well done on speaking to the manager op but I would still be moving if I were you. From what you say, there isn't really any staff member who is doing their job properly and the manager is clearly useless if they haven't realised what is and isn't happening and made changes already. What you describe is the polar opposite of my experiences at 3 different nurseries so you are not making a fiss about nothing. Hopefully things will improve and you can take your time investigating alternatives. Once you have made that move you will feel so glad you did. Regarding your worries about him settling in, it sounds to me like he will be one of those little ones who settle in quite well anywhere.

A fuss, not a fiss clearly. Sorry

YANBU - I would not be happy with this at all. there must be one carer responsible for his "class"? at my children's nursery school, the head of the nursery school greets all children by name, then they are greeted by the 2 nursery teachers responsible for their class, and they go off and find their names and put it in their class pot. There are loads of toys out whilst drop off is going on, and then they move into a more structured routine.
I would have huge alarm bells going off in my head if my child was met with a seeming complete lack of interest and care. What are the doing with him the whole time he is there?

When I drop him off, most of the girls are sitting playing with the kids. So it's not like they ignore them all day. I think the problem is that everyone is In 'play' mode rather than 'welcome' mode. And it's obviously not occurred to anyone to drop what they are doing and come see us. Or perhaps everyone thinks it's someone else's responsibility. Hopefully now I have said something that will change. Hopefully next drop off isn't going to be awkward. I do wish I hadn't had to say anything!

Yanbu. Our nursery unlocks the door for each child and greets them. They always check whether there are any problems and pass messages on.

My 3 went to the same nursery, I could barely afford it but as soon as they walked in they ran up to the staff for a hug! If we were ever late then they would be 'collected' off me and taken to play. The latest addition will be going there too as it is still the most popular nursery around here.

I took my eldest out of a nursery near me as I just felt uneasy everytime I dropped her off. To this day I don't know what it was but I kept looking round after I had dropped her off and felt as though I had to hang about for a few minutes afterwards, she loved going there but I trusted my gut instinct, took her out of that one and she started at the other 'lovely' nursery. A few months later a child 'escaped' from the previous nursery and was only picked up when she wandered into a shop down the road and they phoned the nursery!

Your child may well be quite happy being there, but you are obviously not, hence your post. Trust your instinct, look around for another nursery and ask other mums, they usually know best :)

Good luck, this guilty mum thing never eases!

I am involved with a sessional pre-school and we also do full days. All the children come in either at 9am or 12pm (or stay all day) so they are welcomed at the door by a senior member of staff at the beginning of each session. Once the door is locked about 10/15 mins after session start time then they would ring the door bell and again a senior member of staff would answer the door to them so they are always welcomed in.

All children (parents) of course have to sign in. There is also someone on the door at the end of each session to say goodbye.

I feel sad for you that you have actually had to pull them up on this, unfortunately these things do happen in quite a few settings. When I joined the setting there were a few procedures that were not in place well enough so we have improved in these areas but we were always friendly and welcoming.

If I was you I would see how it goes but if you are in anyway unhappy with any aspect of the care then I would move to a different nursery.

With regards to the toys out, it would be impossible to have all toys out at all times so you are probably being a bit unreasonable there (although there should be some flexibility), they should be working to a room plan to cover all the EYFS learning areas and the toys are often rotated depending on topics. If you are not sure they are doing this then you should ask how they cover the EYFS etc.

Thanks Lou, I understand that they can't necessarily get out any toy at any time. I was more hinting could she help him find a toy he'd like. I was then put out that she hadn't even said hello to ds!

I still don't think the timing of the drop off is an excuse - we don't have set drop-off times at dd's nursery and we often turn up at odd times (due to my working hours). It makes no difference. Someone still comes to meet her, and if the other kids are engaged in something, we get "Come on, you wait until you see what we're doing - say goodbye to Mummy and then we can go and join in, it's so exciting" etc etc.

Yes babyby, that's exactly what I want.

I took my son out of 2 nurseries cos staff were exactly like this- the second one I left him there for longer thinking it wasn't that bad & then I turned up unannounced & saw him on his own in the playground crying... He'd obv been there for some time as his face was red & swollen & the staff were all flustered & saying oh he's fine, he always cries.. Fuckers. If they can't be arsed to say hello to you, do you really think they care about your child? Sorry to sound harsh - I had to learn the hard way too - but a lot of nursery workers just do not care about their charges.

im a nursery worker and i also think u shud take him out!! no matter what time of day it is your child shud ALWAYS be made to feel welcome, even if it is at a busy time it doesnt take much to lift your head, give a smile and say hello! if they cant even be arsed to make an effort when you are there god know what goes on when u leave!
as for the toy thing all that worker had to say was'we'll be getting that out in a wee while' and if it was only a train he was wanting cant see the harm in just getting it for him?!
just seems dodgy to me!

I do agree with you and see what you mean now. I know the staff at my pre-school have often ensured there is a specific toy or something out to make sure a particular child feels more welcome or settled with so they really should make more effort and their attitude sounds - well - a bit crap!

Well done Mumto. Hope you see a huge difference next drop-off.