Not to want to take an Orange Person with me to a business meeting?

[Hopefullyrecovering]

The business is professional services. We went out to a client and the graduate in our team came with me. She was bright orange. Literally bright orange. I could see the client visibly wondering whether or not the orange would rub off onto him during the handshake. It looked grotesque and thoroughly unprofessional. There was an accompanying issue of shedloads of make-up. Which was similarly unprofessional This girl does not need it. She is perfectly nice-looking (I believe although there was so much orange, and fake lashes etc that it is difficult to tell)

So, AIBU? And if IANBU, how on earth am I going to raise this issue?

Agree with everyone else who's said to have a tactful word - couching it in terms of professional expectation rather than personal opinion.

One note of caution - are you sure she isn't wearing a lot of make-up to conceal a skin condition (e.g. rosacea or severe acne)? It may not be immediately obvious.

Alan Carr jokes aside. I think YANBU. I want pink hair and my arms tattooed. Tough shit on me. Clients will look, judge and potentially chose not to place business with my company. Maybe it's not right, but if I choose to look a certain way people can choose to judge me based on that look.

Plus I would judge an orange person with false eyelashes in the office. It's not a nightclub. I'd also probably assume she's not that bright as I'd lump her in with all the Jersey Shore types.

SPB - I'm sorry to have offended you. I meant pretty young things as opposed to wizened old prunes like me. FWIW I did vote to give the long-haired chap his promotion but I was voted down. Just to show you that I am at the liberal end of the spectrum :)

Of course this is not an issue of race. That has never once in my fairly long experience been raised as an issue in any recruitment or promotion discussion.

Is there a dress code or anything in the employment contracts about this? Only it will go down a lot better if you couch it in terms of what the company requires of everyone rather than you personally (or specific clients) not liking her look.

I'm feeling outnumbered by judgey normatives!

Debeez that's your stupidity then isn't it. I hope she stays orange and gets promoted to ceo. Then has words with all the non-orange people and hands out fake tan. :)

My DH was once told that his shirts were "career limiting" and given the name of a shop he might like to look at. He was young, it was done kindly, and he took the advice on board. I think you ought to speak to your colleague, OP, but do it kindly, and make it about the company rather than her as a person. We all have to dress appropriately for work- I teach teenage boys so have to be very careful about necklines.

I'm with Stealth

"You didn't give someone a job that presumably they were best for because of their hair?
You talk about women as pretty young things?"

slowest

Glad you don't share these attitudes then. TBH this sort of thing really riles me - and I'm not a "pretty young thing". I am scruffy but do make the effort when I need to with a boring suit, boring hair etc. I admire people who dare to be different. I certainly think she is young, she will almost certainly sober up as she gets older. Ultimately others are right that clients etc may be put off and as her manager (I assume?) you'll need to decide how to manage that - which I imagine will keep her ina more "back office" role and restrict her chances. That is up to her though. Telling her that is one thing, telling her to tone it down is treating her like the child she is not.

garlic, if you want to feel really outnumbered and oppressed, read this

Is there is a dress code covering make up and hair? If not then YABU. If thats how she feels confident then i don't see the problem

would you not have taken an ugly older person either?

slowestwildebeast Fri 18-May-12 17:02:44
Debeez that's your stupidity then isn't it. I hope she stays orange and gets promoted to ceo. Then has words with all the non-orange people and hands out fake tan.

YES. Or leaves and starts up a rival bsuiness :o
Maybe she could find long-hair guy

Yes there is a dress code

I have just checked the handbook

It doesn't cover people dying themselves Orange

Although it does say that any make-up should be restrained.

Career limiting shirts. Was it one with palm trees on? I have a career limiting face, permanent cat bum/squinty frown. :os

Garlicfucker I think I get where you're coming from. And if it's that people being judged on their appearance is unacceptable I totally agree. My DH has long hair and a septum piercing which brings all manner of pre-conceptions, despite him being a very intelligent, articulate, successul man. It seems like sometimes he has to work that bit harder to prove himself just because of his appearance.

However, he works in music so, professionally, it's never really an issue. But I know what an issue appearance can be in most businesses and I actually think it's only fair to this woman to let her know how people will perceive her because of her appearance.

she no doubt thinks she looks tanned and lovely!

I once watched a programme that said a couple had turned themselves orange by eating nothing but heinz tomato soup. Does she have a soup aroma or is it definately biscuits you can smell?

I have pink hair. If said hair was holding me back in a professional capacity (it's been various colours and it never has done, but I've never worked in a very professional environment anyway...) I would appreciate being told about it.

I think a quiet word if you think it's holding her back would be appropriate. If it's not holding her back and it's that you simply don't like it, then I think you just need to put up with it :o

at all slowest's posts

Well everyone's a critic! I was only putting effort in to look my best as it is so obviously important in this sodding company!

kidding :)

Fanjo - the ugly older person was present at the meeting :) Twas me

But I was very sensibly dressed, and wearing appropriate levels of make-up. And my shoes were not too high and were not open toed. And the client listened to me and took my advice. He was a bit dismissive of my young 'un though. Partly I think because of the whole look. She will have to work harder to overcome that look, I reckon.