To leave Dd alone in hotel room?

[Shelby2010]

More of a WWYD really. We are going to be staying with Dd (18mths) in a hotel next month on holiday & then overnight for a wedding in July. How safe do MNetters feel it is to leave their sleeping DC in the room with either the listening service or a normal baby monitor while eating in the hotel restaurant or attending an evening reception?

Am I being very PFB to worry about how many members of staff could access the room (especially with programable card keys)? The fact that hotels do offer a listening service suggests that many parents are ok with this. I'm torn between thinking I'm paranoid and thinking that they always tell you not to leave valuables in you room except in the safe..... Help!

I did this at a hotel last month - baby monitor on, us in the hotel restaurant on the floor below and checking regularly. We felt comfortable with it. But if you're already picturing hotel staff sneaking around with keycards, it doesn't seem likely you'll be able to relax on the night, so why put yourself through it?

Zuu, go back a few posts and read LeQ's post.

Please.

Something good could come from that imogen because you can now, hand on heart say that you know someone whos children almost died in a fire on holiday and so you will never take the risk. It might make some one else think twice too.

LeQ well put.

My sister said that she knew that she would have terrible jealousy of a child because she would have to share her DH with it. Some would call it awful, I call it honest and so glad that she can admit so that she doesnt have that child.

Many people dont see it as selfish though, thats the trouble.

With the glossies showing slebs having babies in January and then doing the awards season in March followed by a baby free "break" (ie: less than a month holiday) in May, is it any wonder that we are being led to believe that we come first and the kids "will be fine"?

Even the PG/M&B mags talk at length about granny taking baby for a few hours so you can have a leisurely lunch. and while that is fine, its a short leap from that to leaving the baby in a hotel room alone for a couple of hours and then to buggering off to the caribbean for three weeks and not ring home once (I know someone who did this). Ok, so that is an extreme example, but it does happen.

Its the ME ME ME culture and it has even invaded parenthood :(

bogeyface, I've already read it, and the rest of the thread.

To me family holidays are about being there as a family, not leaving the children to go and have 'me time' or 'us time'. That can be done at home when you have a babysitter the child knows and is comfortable with!

We are going away at the weekend with friends, our ds is 14 months their dd is 16 months.

We will be taking them with us and trying to settle them in their prams. It hasn't crossed any of our minds to leave them in their rooms while we go for dinner.

I buggered off abroad with DH when my eldest was 18 months old

it was a disaster

she chose that week to get herself admitted to hospital with massively swollen glands, a raging temperature, dehydration and the threat of lymph node biopsy

she was perfectly fine the day we left her with her doting grandparents, and we couldn't get an earlier flight home (it was off season and flights only once a week)

"oh, you'll be fine, you are only a short flight away" was what we allowed ourselves to be reassured by

er, no, not if there are no friggin' planes !

we had said to MIL "only call us if somebody dies" < big joke, haha >

imagine our dread to get a text msg saying "call home"

that was the first and last time I put my "right" to child-free jollies and uninteruppted shagging before my dc

never again (they are nearly grown now, and we have never done it again)

lesson learned

our holiday was no holiday at all, just sat in the hotel room for 4 days crying, figuring out how to hijack a plane to fly us back to the UK

a bit off topic, sorry, but it just reminded me

Hah! Dont you believe it imogen! She just does it safely, thats all :)

I admire people that admit they are to selfish to have children- atleast they dont bring a child into the world to suffer a life they wont enjoy.
My aunty is like this- she is great with kids, a lovely lady, loves her dogs, loves her job but she made a choice not to have children as she sees her self as too selfish.
What i cant stand is selfish people that pop out a sprog or even sprogs then put al their luxuries first with no regard for their dcs!!-leaving your child alone in a hotel room is unthinkable, extremely selfish and im sorry to say this-neglectful.
How can someone be at ease drinking and socialising whilst there dc is left to their own devices??
Sorry cant see why anyone would do it except for truely selfish entitled reasons and i hope the mothers that have done it think twice and not repeat it

I think the only way to get 'us' time on a holiday, is to go as a big group, with other family members and share the 'babysitting'.

Maybe I'm being hypocritical though, because I do judge (a bit) when friends drop their kids off in kids clubs every day during their holidays with strangers.

Oh FFS. I can appreciate how an experience like LeQ's would make LeQ reluctant ever to let her DC out of her sight again, and same with AF's holiday but most of the time you CAN have a night out without Bad Things occurring.

And kids can also spontaneously combust (or just plain old die in their sleep) or whatever when you are at home, saying your prayers, having forgone any kind of pleasure in life since the minute you agreed to TTC. There are no guarantees. None.

I think it's probable that some of the real screamers on this thread are engaging in the usual type of stupid-person's magical thinking: if you make a big self-righteous fuss about how wicked (and especially how selfish) other people are, it works as a kind of spell to ensure that nothing bad happens to you. Guess what, it doesn't work at all.

Use Sitters babysitting service if no hotel one, they have people all over and they are all checked. Most are nannies, nursery workers, foster carers or teachers. I use them at home but would be happy to book if staying somewhere else, I have met some great babysitters.

I would do baby listener if a 'boutique' hotel with only a few bedrooms, but the one time we stayed a posh hotel with babies (twins) we had a babysitter as the hotel made it so easy.,..

solidgoldbrass-a night out is fine if you pay for a babysitter but leaving kids in a hotel room is just asking for trouble isnt it?
Do you seriously think its not selfish and unavoidable?

Of course you can have a night out without bad thing happening - you leave the child with a trusted babysitter rather than on their own which will make for a much more enjoyable night out and a much safer one for the child!

but most of the time you CAN have a night out without Bad Things occurring

The problem I have with that is MOST OF THE TIME.

Occasionally, bad things happen. So most of the time doesnt cut it for me. Most of the time I drove home from work I was fine. Once I was hit by a lorry, in an accident so bad that the police and ambulance has calls in double figures and were expecting to scrape me and my family off the dual carriage way 40 feet below the roundabout I was on.

But still, most of the time, I was fine......

And no, I dont believe that rolling my eyes and wagging my judgy finger will somehow protect my family.

But I do know that if the worst did happen, I did my very very best to protect them.

Can you say that?

So, bogeyface, I take it you have never driven again and think that anyone else who drives a car is selfish and only has him/herself to blame if Something Bad Happens?

Some people on here are arguing that parents should never use a babysitter, not even doting grandparents, because to have any childfree time is Wicked and Selfish and your children might die...

Like i said some mothers are selfish and that is my opinion-leaving dcs alone is selfish & no i dont believe it will magicaly protect my family but i do my upmost to protect them when possible-leaving my dcs alone would be neglectful and sefish-something i do not believe is a good quality in a mother.
solid -"spontantusly combust" & "children die in their sleep" what a horrible vile thing to write on a board where bereaved mothers may see it-oh what a lovely mother you must be?