To feel attacked>? re. To Childproof or not to Childproof.

[arrgghhhhhhh]

I was having a discussion with someone a mate, I cant fully remember how but got on to the subject of people who arent very safety concious. and how it bothers me even more now I have a child.

I spoke of an incident where a drink for my then 1 year old had a drink of his put on a high surface which I didnt know was not stable. my son had to grab the top to pull himself up to get the drink and the entire thing came off the wall and this also resulted in lighters , screws and an ashtray nearly missing his head. And that I was more in shock at the very near accident then the mess it had made.
I got a tirade of 'you shouldnt expect people to change their houses for you? you need to teach them not to touch?' its their house??

AIBU? to feel a bit attacked I wasnt complaining about the persons house just the lack of basic safety ? I'm very confused. this person does not have kids If thats any relevance.

Accidents do happen unfortunately but at least he OK

UABU
DD1 could find the one thing she shouldn't in the most child-proofed of houses.

DD2 could be let loose anywhere and only touch the toys provided for her.

I'm afraid OP it is your job to scan your environment and discreetly check for loose fittings, because only you know if your in charge of DD1 who would have pulled herself up on the loose cover or DD2 who would have been playing nicely.

My child was NOT i repeat NOT climbing.

I was sat next to him, the drink was brought through by another person and they encouraged him to get it off the top.

you said it was a high surface yourself but not high enough ?

you obviously wasn't doing that great a job at being on your feet making sure he doesn't get stuff or he wouldn't have gotten close enough to reach killer ashtray.

I rent and I can't attach fittings to walls. I would be worried about a child climbing on them (I am childless myself). But wouldn't expect a parent to be surprised if accidents occured if their child climbed on my furniture.

When I have children it will have to be low heavy bottomed furniture, but until then my unattached bookcases will have to stay up I am afraid.

Perhaps YOU should have scanned the room on arrival and moved anything you considered dangerous.

This is one of those AIBUs that goes;

OP: AIBU?
MAJORITY: YABU
OP: IANBU!

You are clearly Not always on your feet dropping him pulling ornaments, or this wouldn't have happened.

Still your responsibility I'm afraid.

I wouldn't have let my DD pull themselves up on anything at that age I thought was unsafe. If I was in someone else's house, I wouldn't have let her pull herself up on anything tbh. At that age I'd have passed her the drink because I'd be more worried about her breaking something someone else's house.

DPrince that makes no sense he was not pulling ornaments at all.

I'll leave it now not once person has actually read the OP.

That must be some fucking ashtray.

when my dd reaches for something and I am sat next to her I know for a fact that I'd see if something was amiss and I would act accordingly.

OP, reckon you're just feeling guilty for not keeping a close enough eye on your child and blaming everyone and everything for something that YOU should have been able to prevent.

Oops i meant dropping him. If you were sat next to him why didn't you get it if he had to pull on it.

Why does my phone keep changing stopping to dropping?

no he wasnt pulling ornameants Dprince is quoting you ''I'm always on my feet to make sure he doesnt go for ornaments etc.''

and i agree you werent.

how many people are on this thread? lets say 20 with a fair few posts between us.

If 20 of us are all saying the same thing and you still maintain we've not understood - how can that be?

YOU typed your posts.

You want some ketchup to go with that chip on your shouder?

instead of an ornament he pulled a radiator cover or whatever. and now you've been attacked ... Busy day

I did read the opening post and conclude it was an accident.

Worst thing is you went and bitched about it to someone else and even after they told you YWBU you asked and disagreed with all of us

also maybe this person ranted as they might be fed up of people expecting them to change things because they have kids.

YABU for blaming someone else for an accident involving your child.

If the problem is dodgy DIY then that's not their problem if they're happy to live with it. It's obviously not fair on you for not realising that the radiator wasn't attached to the wall but it an accident.

What did the other person say after the incident....sorry?

Also, childproofing is different surely?

We keep a lot of cleaning products and medicines in bottom cupboards. If a child came around I would be careful to make sure they were removed. If the child was particularly inquisitive and I would be looking after them on my own then I may go out and buy those plug covers. I would remove small brakable objects from low down (not that I have any) and turn pan ahndles around and tidy up cables.

You are suggesting re-doing the furniture!

YABU

Your child, your responsibility.

You ASSUMED someone else would behave like you would.

But the other person doesn't have kids so couldn't reasonably have been expected to know how a small child would behave.

But you're not going to see it.

Because this is one of those AIBUs

I love the fact that dozens of people have told you YABU and you are just getting more and more angry that they don't feel they've understood you.

I think you are being harsh on your friend, particularly if they don't have children themselves. Until I had children, I really didn't realise that a child's reach/lean/grab is rather more physical of the furniture than that of an adult.

If your child grabbed the ledge to try and reach the drink, clearly the things on it (including the ashtray) had been put pretty much out of reach. And unless your friend had physically measured your child and how high he could reach, even if he could just grab it it doesn't sound like it was a bad guess at putting it safely away.

I'll leave it now not once person has actually read the OP.

Everyone has read it. We just don't agree with you.

Yip.

I was right.

One of those AIBU's