Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

AIBU to think stretch marks have ruined my body!!

56 replies

youngmummy17 · 10/05/2012 09:31

i'm only 18 and i am covered in stretch marks from having ds, from legs to belly! i don't know if it's because am young it's affecting me more as all my friends and girls my age have none, i refuse to wear anything that will show them and most are white some are translucent but i have zero confidence and think men especially find them repulsive, AIBU to think stretch marks are just a 'turn off' and men, friends etc just find them awful to look at and can anyone recommend ANYTHING to help the look of them?

OP posts:

Darkling · 10/05/2012 09:35

Bio oil is meant to help them fade but honestly they probably aren't as bad as you think they are and in time you won't be as conscious of them, I have lots from my pregnancy and DH doesn't see them as a turn off, any man who would is shallow and not worth being with.

CrunchyFrog · 10/05/2012 09:48

Mine are still red in places, my stomach looks like it's made of crepe paper, I have an overhang and my boobs are like tennis balls in socks.

But.

I have more male attention than I know what to do with, and not one has mentioned finding stretch marks repulsive. Course, they wouldn't have time to mention it, what with being so busy weeping with gratitude for being allowed near me

I'm only half joking, it does not matter one jot what you look like as long as you are happy in your skin. And being happy in your skin is the single most attractive thing you can be.

LittleWhiteMice · 10/05/2012 09:53

it dousnt look that great, bt if the guys your looking at are 18 too, give them 6 years and time to have kids and they wont care either.

most of us end up with stretch marks/ cellulite/weight issues.

people start to look different in their 20s too, well late. they dont have that fresh young looking skin(men and women) because they are not!

dont worry too much, think about sex from your point of view not his, is he doing it right? your body is a casing for your soul and nothing more. :)

manicbmc · 10/05/2012 09:57

Any man worth his salt will not be bothered by a few stretch marks. Mine go from my boobs to my knees (thank you twins ) and I did have a few from age 12.

And for the brief time I was single I had so much male attention and not one of them mentioned the stretch marks (or huge fat apron belly) at all.

LST · 10/05/2012 10:01

I'm 21 and my belly and boobs have stretch marks from my DS. And I too don't like people see them. Bio oil really helps them though, what helps me most is looking at them and then looking at my DS. It's all seems worth it then

ItsAPublicForumWhine · 10/05/2012 10:04

I have no children and stretch marks from puberty & weight going up and down - not a significant amount either, I just have crap skin.

It's never been an issue when it comes to men! You'll be fine and learn to accept them eventually - at least you have lovely DC to show for yours rather than just crap skin that stretch marks at the drop of a hat!

Squirrelz · 10/05/2012 10:20

As a guy (admittedly one that's twice your age), they really don't bother me.

If they do put any men off you, I would suggest they're ones that you've done well to avoid...

sashh · 10/05/2012 10:28

and think men especially find them repulsive

If a man has got as far as getting you naked he is not going to care about a stretch mark or two, he probably won't notice.

Scars are like tattoos, but with more interesting stories (can't remember who first said that)

Flisspaps · 10/05/2012 10:31

I love mine.

DH loves mine.

They are normal and you should be proud of them. Any man repulsed by them isn't worthy of having intimate activity with anyway.

Loonybun · 10/05/2012 10:34

I have tons. I am also due with ds (dc number 2) in 4 weeks time so that's added even more. I actually couldn't care less about mine - I am a bit older than you at 31, I do care about my appearance etc but I really don't think stretchmarks matter at all :)

My dh loves all my bits - wobbly stretchmarked bits as well :) I agree with sashh- a man who gets you naked isn't going to be inspecting your stretchmarks!

I've had several partners since I had my dd aged 9 - was a single mum for years before I met dh- and it's never ever been an issue!

If they really really bother you I've heard bio oil is supposed to be good, but seriously don't get yourself depressed over them.

WelshCat · 10/05/2012 10:36

I have had 1 boyfriend since DS was born. I was bricking it about him seeing my stretch marks because I used to be much hotter than I am now and he was the first man to see them, but honestly, he did not give a sh*t. And frankly I was quite distracted every time my clothes were off and they were visible so I found it didn't matter at all!

Herrena · 10/05/2012 10:37

I had loads of stretch marks when I was 12, due to just generally developing! Also had them on arms and legs which was prob due to overeating

They had faded to silver before I knew it and aren't really noticeable now.

I got loads more in pregnancy but they also have faded (11mo post-event).

IME men who are worth the trouble don't care if you've got stretch marks, they're just grateful that you deign to let them into your bed and are mature enough to appreciate the whole package

OTOH if you are really self-conscious about them then may I suggest a bit of fake tan, to get you through the period where they're fading? Also lots of men find confidence sexy; if you laugh and say 'yeah, got a few stretch marks, thanks DS' then they will probably be relieved that you seem so comfortable with yourself!

If they accept you as you are then maybe you can do the same for yourself and then the act won't be an act anymore. It's the same principle as telling yourself to smile when you feel that you want to cheer up :)

tryingtoleave · 10/05/2012 10:37

They do get better, especially if you are young, I think. My breasts were covered in hideous red stripes after ds was born and they are hardly noticeable now, five years later.

Herrena · 10/05/2012 10:37

Oh dear, far too many emoticons - apologies!!

featherbag · 10/05/2012 10:38

YABU, stretch marks haven't ruined your body at all, I know very few people (male and female) who have none at all! I got loads in my late teens/early twenties from weight gain, yet none at all from my recent pregnancy. Having had my stretch marks over 10 years, and having had them appear by the time I was your age, I can promise you that by the time you're my age (31) their appearance will have improved/your attitude to them will have changed to the point where you don't notice them any more.

Make a conscious decision that you aren't going to become paranoid over something that's normal, very common, mostly in your head and you can't do anything about anyway. You'll be happier for it! Enjoy your DC!

Loonybun · 10/05/2012 10:40

Just also wanted to add I don't think its purely related to women or childbirth either ... My dh is all of 9 stone and he has some on his bum - :) doesn't bother me one bit! We just laugh about them... It's just skin :)

Emphaticmaybe · 10/05/2012 10:49

I'm so glad it's not just me manicbmc twins have turned my entire middle section into something out of a horror film. DH does not seem to have a problem with this- we went on to have another child,

Herrena · 10/05/2012 10:49

Oh yeah, I realised I was worrying over nothing when I spotted stretch marks on a friend of mine at the beach (we were 15). I'd just been thinking 'God, I wish I had a figure like her' when I saw them! She'd been in great shape forever too so they weren't a relic of past chubbiness or anything.

If all your friends don't have stretch marks then they're a bit physically unusual TBH!!

kmdwestyorks · 10/05/2012 10:49

they do fade,you might never again flash your body as much as you did pre child but you will find eventually that you can show more than you feel comfortable doing now.

For some perspective would you swop your DS for flawless skin?

and every women on here is correct, men don't care at all and see them as a normal feature of a mothers body. My DH calls them my go faster stripes.

manicbmc · 10/05/2012 10:57

I reckon, if I use different coloured pens, I could join all mine up to make a map of the London underground.

ItsAPublicForumWhine · 10/05/2012 11:00

normal feature of a mothers body

They're not restricted to mothers! I have them and I am childless.

lattelov3r · 10/05/2012 11:04

could be worse i not only have stretchmarks all down back of thighs and calves but i have big blue veins too, i can never wear a dress or or shorts again and never feel comfortable on holiday or going to the pool :( dh dosnt care though so dont think men really do

Annunziata · 10/05/2012 11:06

LOL at the London Underground map.

My DDs both have stretch marks and they don't have kids. Your friends will have them! Maybe you're just more aware of yours. And if he's worth it, he won't care if you have stretch marks at all.

TalHotBlond · 10/05/2012 11:07

I have them and tbh they do bother me. I won't wear a bikini on the beach for example so they do limit me. I had hardly any after my first pregnancy then got pregnant again a year later and they completely ravaged my stomach. Apparently they do fade with time tbough.

I think they would make me self conscious during sex with anyone who wasn't DH but as it is I just tell him that it is technically his fault. I suggest doing this.

kmdwestyorks · 10/05/2012 11:12

ItsAPublicForumWhine true, most of us had them before kids but most of us get a whole lot more afterwards though.

Flip

1 2 3