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AIBU?

AIBU to think stretch marks have ruined my body!!

56 replies

youngmummy17 · 10/05/2012 09:31

i'm only 18 and i am covered in stretch marks from having ds, from legs to belly! i don't know if it's because am young it's affecting me more as all my friends and girls my age have none, i refuse to wear anything that will show them and most are white some are translucent but i have zero confidence and think men especially find them repulsive, AIBU to think stretch marks are just a 'turn off' and men, friends etc just find them awful to look at and can anyone recommend ANYTHING to help the look of them?

OP posts:

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ragged · 10/05/2012 11:13

yabu, sorry you're feeling so bad, but it's silly to. I can't think of a man worth having who would care. I do have them, and I kind of like them. Never had a man say anything unkind about them (no shortage of criticism in my other areas).

ItsAPublicForumWhine · 10/05/2012 11:14

kmd did you mean that to sound so rude?

kmdwestyorks · 10/05/2012 11:22

ItsAPublicForumWhine No, i really didn't mean it to even a little bit rude at all so i am very sorry if that's how it sounded.

TalHotBlond · 10/05/2012 11:24

Oh and forgot to say. Might not be useful but it helped me to remember that no else knows you have them. People cant see through your clothes and unless it's a doctor's appointment or something there is no social occasion where you will be expected to pull your top up for an inspection. Some of my closest friends don't know I have stretch marks or that I am self conscious about them if I do. I just wear swimming costumes instead as they are "more practical" when I'm with the children. Ahem!

ItsAPublicForumWhine · 10/05/2012 11:25

Ok kmd sorry, my mistake!

gourd · 10/05/2012 11:29

You know what as you get older you have so many other problems and so much stress that your stretch marks will pale by comparison! I am not joking! You do get used to them, they also go white and less noticeable. If you have a suntan you will see the marks more, as they do not tan but you can blend them into a tan using some make up or fake tan/self tan which does cover them pretty much completely. You will find that whoever loves you doesn't even notice them and you get to love them too eventually. They are part of who you are and tell your story, just like the scars that we all get too. Most people end up getting some stretch marks, and even some men get them too, so by the time you are 30 or 40 nearly everyone you know will also have them anyway. You may also have a lovely child to care for and they will so completely fill your life (in every sense, not just in time and energy) that you will not even think about stretch marks or notice them any more. I know this may not help at the moment but really they don?t matter one bit in life. Most people look at your face when they talk to you - or they ought to anyway, if they aren't then maybe you don?t want to talk to them! If you want to minimalise the appearance of stretch marks, remember that they fade to white, in a few months, you can cover them with make up or tan, and do try not to get sunburned as this makes them look worse. Above all, love your own body. It's your self confidence, smile and the way you treat others that makes you beautiful and sexy (this is what has been said to me by the man I love)!

Lovelynewboots · 10/05/2012 11:29

I had them at your age and they are perfectly normal whether you have had a baby or not. Obviously at 41 and three kids later I have a lot more now, but they were thin and silvery and perfectly normal. I bet you look fabulous, enjoy being 18 and try not to worry about it. I remember friends having them too.

DeathCab · 10/05/2012 11:30

My stomach is covered in them from having DD, i did already have some on my legs from being a teenager and putting on weight though.

Sometimes they bother me but as someone said before, it just makes me proud that they are from having my DD.

A few of the worst ones look like stab wounds though as they are very wide! But its normal to have them so i wouldn't worry too much!

gourd · 10/05/2012 11:33

By the way, I have them and I wear a bikini on the beach. I find a design that isnt too tiny so I feel good and I know I look good in it despite my marks. You see all shapes and sizes on the beach and the more relaxed you are, and the more confident, the better you look. Noone is looking at the marks anyway, they are just seeing a pretty girl. It does take time to realise this, years in fact, in my case, but it is true.

mangomadness · 10/05/2012 15:05

Try bodyshop cocoa butter lotion and stick, I'm still pregnant but using this has changed ny boobs from being covered in angry red stretch marks to hardly noticeable

DaisyMaisyJessicaEmily · 10/05/2012 15:19

I've had stretchmarks since my first pregnancy aged 17. I've never had anyone comment on them at all aside from the prick I was married to who gave me the baby who gave me the stretchmarks!!

I'm almost 40 now and they are very faded, pale silvery and I pretty much don't notice them.

Please don't obsess over this one aspect of your body that you can't change.

Trills · 10/05/2012 15:22

YABU

Your body is not "ruined". It still does everything a body is supposed to do.

Plenty of people who have not had children have stretchmarks, you often get them at puberty during a growth spurt. The fact that you have not noticed this on others should help you to realise that it is not as big a deal as you think it is.

LenLovesSue · 10/05/2012 15:35

Lots of men have them from growth spurts. My friend who is tall and very slim has loads from her adolescence but got none during pregnancy!

Fluffy1234 · 10/05/2012 15:37

I had my DS when I was 19 and felt like you ( not helped by my mother who sent me on a beauty course thing to try and get rid of them - it didn't work). Not one friend or boy friend or my now husband has ever mentioned them. And they really do fade over time.

BigBoPeep · 10/05/2012 15:40

I've had them as long as I can remember simply from getting too fat, too quick! It's never EVER been a problem with men/sex. For a start, once they get past the red/purple fresh stage, they're not immediately noticeable, and secondly, there's two types of men you will sleep with - 1) they just want pussy, and as long as you're giving it up they don't care what the rest of you is like (see jeremy kyle for proof, they will dip it in anything) 2) the type that love you for YOU, and ASIF a few blemishes would put them off!?!?

(My hubby loved my pregnant body and now loves my post pregnant body saying I'm still 'megasexy' - his words - I do think he's slightly cracked, but he says he is proud of what I've done!)

HateBeingCantDoUpMyJeans · 10/05/2012 15:40

I don't think men are put off by them tbh. They can be the result of many things. If you are naked on a bed he will not be thinking about your stretch marks, if he is naked he is more likely to be worried about the size of his willy.

havingabath · 10/05/2012 15:47

At seventeen I got one of the best full sets of belly breast and thigh sstretch marks I have ever seen. My inner thighs look 80!

They did make me dress differently sometimes but anyone who got to see them shouldn't care. Indeed the men who did, many of them young, never cared at all.

If one did it would have told me he was a dick.

GoPoldark · 10/05/2012 16:06

It's not just women. My DH is very tall and slim and has some really thick, long stretch marks right across the small of his back presumably from when he was shooting up to his current 6' 3''. They're a part of him and his yummy sexy back so - yum yum. Honestly OP, when YOUR Mr. Yum comes along, that's what he's going to be thinking about your back/tum/boobs whatever - yum, basically.

Doyouthinktheysaurus · 10/05/2012 16:51

I regard my stretchmarks as part of my life story, just like the scar and overhang on my tum from my surgery. I used to care about the overhang but the surgery saved my life. I've learned to celebrate my bodies foibles.

Give it time, hopefully you will learn to love your body the way it is too. I don't think men really care, dh never has.

youngmummy17 · 10/05/2012 17:14

maybe it's just the immature 18 year old boys i see talk online about how off putting they are, think it's more a case of me learning to love myself then finding someone who can love me for them it was worth it for having DS but just seeing males/ friends and even magazines makes me feel shit i'm the only one!

OP posts:

Trills · 10/05/2012 17:22

Magazines are supposed to make you feel shit.

If you didn't feel shit then you wouldn't want to buy all the stuff in the adverts that promise to make you feel less shit.

MistyRocks · 10/05/2012 17:24

awww op :(

you are only 18. i bet you are gorgeous. i am sure they are not as bad as you think and even if they are really bad they do fade in time i promise you.x

ps-men don't notice them. :o

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IWasDrunkItDoesntCount · 10/05/2012 18:08

"Your body isn't ruined, your a tiger who earned her stripes" I dont know where the quote comes from but its true!

BigBoPeep · 10/05/2012 21:41

good god, do not listen to anything 18yr old boys say about women! They would wet themselves with excitement to get one naked - they make up that stuff about being put off by stretch marks to pretend that it's ever an issue for them!

picnicbasketcase · 10/05/2012 21:44

My MW called them 'medals of motherhood'. Bit vom but you see her point.

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