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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

DH has bought DS (15) an air rifle

162 replies

Fiendishlie · 06/05/2012 18:12

They went to a 'gun club' for some sort of taster session. Of course they have come home with a £140 air rifle. I am furious on so many levels; guns, money, lack of consultation (pretty sure I've said no in the past).
What should I do? I've stormed off in disgust and taken to my bed. DH will no doubt do his usual trick of turning it round so that he's angry with me for daring to be upset.

OP posts:

Chubfuddler · 06/05/2012 20:29

So your real problem is that your Dh has the attention span of a gnat and wastes money on flash in the pan interests. Fair enough. But there's nothing inherently wrong with owning an air rifle, which some on this thread seem to think.

AgentZigzag · 06/05/2012 20:31

So if you're not in total control of your emotions because you're angry and think calm measured discussion might be beyond you SoupDragon, the best thing to do is to get out of the situation and calm down before discussing it without the anger.

thekidsrule · 06/05/2012 20:34

op theres plenty of people that dont like guns,your not on your own

Original poster

Fiendishlie · 06/05/2012 20:35

This seems to be a very divisive issue, Chub, as I do think there's something inherently wrong in owning an air rifle. We probably won't ever agree then, but at least it's more interesting than the usual mumnet issue of toilet brushes and farting in front of one's DP.
Please give it a rest SoupDragon. I decided that I did not want to spend some time chatting with my DH in our usual friendly manner in the living room. Instead, because I am upset with his decision re the gun, I decided to go upstairs and chat with nice people on mumsnet.
Better?

OP posts:

littlemslazybones · 06/05/2012 20:35

brdgrl One of the child's parents does not want her child to have a gun. That's sufficient.

This is surely the crux of the matter and I couldn't agree more. And for the most part, you could substitute the word gun for just about any object or activity and I'd still agree.

Fiendishlie When I need to calm down I sit at the top of the stairs, going to bed is probably better.

bronze · 06/05/2012 20:36

Thinking guns are ok and considering them as toys are two entirely different thing

Bluegrass · 06/05/2012 20:37

I got my first at about 14. They are a good way of learning about responsibility and trust, I got a lot of instruction about what I could and couldn't do with it, how to clean and oil it to stop it rusting and i followed those instructions to the letter. It helped pave the way for me learning to shoot clay pigeon (a sport the UK is still very good at).

A lockable trigger guard is a cheaper alternative to a gun cabinet, although in my case my parents trusted me so I had access to the gun cabinet anyway. I never gave them any reason to regret trusting me.

thekidsrule · 06/05/2012 20:38

please somebody answer my ???? up thread,serious ???? maybe you can enlighten me

bronze · 06/05/2012 20:40

Thekidsrule maybe because they shoot at more than one venue

AgentZigzag · 06/05/2012 20:41

'why the hell would you need/want a gun in the house???????????????'

I'd be interested in that as well thekid (and why your question marks seem to be breeding )

EdlessAllenPoe · 06/05/2012 20:42

sadly bluegrass i knew enough teenagers whose parents had placed that trust in them that totally abused it, by, e.g shooting at streetlights, cats...each other...

Bluegrass · 06/05/2012 20:46

Poe- I guess the same is true of driving. Experience shows some young people shouldn't be trusted with a car, they may pass a test but they end up killing themselves and innocent bystanders every day.

thekidsrule · 06/05/2012 20:49

agent,crikey they are a bit i shall restrain myself from now,lol

EdlessAllenPoe · 06/05/2012 20:53

i wouldn't buy a 15 year old a car either....

EdlessAllenPoe · 06/05/2012 20:54

though there is a point in teaching 17 year olds to drive.

blackberryjam · 06/05/2012 20:55

I don't think YABU - I would be very upset too but then I have good reason not to really be 'into' guns. My mum was permanently blinded in one eye when she was 15 by some lads messing around with an air rifle. They accidentally shot it through an open window and hit my mum. She had to use an artificial (glass) eye for the rest of her life.

I guess if they feel a need to shoot things then why don't they keep the gun at the club? I would feel very uneasy with a gun in the house in case it got into the wrong hands.

Bluegrass · 06/05/2012 21:01

I wouldn't buy a 15 year old a car either as they are far more dangerous! Whether things have a point to them depends on where you stand. I struggle to see much of a point to many sports and hobbies (including dangerous ones) but other people evidently do!

fivegomadindorset · 06/05/2012 21:04

I am of the get a grip nrigade but then that is how I ahve been brought up.

amillionyears · 06/05/2012 21:19

blackberryjam,sorry,sad face.
This is what I was saying near the beginning.
The op needs to concentrate on this for now.
DS will be wanting to use the air rifle right away.

thirdfromleft · 06/05/2012 21:37

Exposing children to risky things in a controlled way may be an excellent way to prepare them for the world.

See: rock climbing, abseiling, scuba, and yes air rifles.

Just a thought.

whojamaflip · 06/05/2012 21:50

So I suppose this isn't a good time to say that my 9 yr old ds has an air rifle for pest control?

He only uses it under supervision of dh on the farm to control rats and the rest of the time it is locked away with our shotguns and he has no idea where the keys are kept.

imo an air gun for a child is ok in the right circumstances and the right hands ie a confident experianced adult to supervise and a mature child who has grown up with the idea that guns have a purpose and ARE NOT TOYS! My ds has never had a toy gun and from an early age has had it drummed into him that guns are dangerous and not for playing with.

On the other point I would also be very pissed of with dh if he had bought ds a gun without discussing it with me first. This is a major decision and both of you should have been in agreement before purchase.

Ponyofdoom · 06/05/2012 21:50

I am amazed by your reaction and behaviour, it sounds really strange to me! Why shouldn't he buy the kid an air rifle? Does he have to consult on everything? I love my air rifle, it's great for shooting rats and targets. I must be on a different planet :-0

amillionyears · 06/05/2012 21:51

rock climbing, abseiling, scuba, do not potentially blind as far as I am aware.Just a thought.
a bit more compassion to blackberryjam, just a thought.

thegreylady · 06/05/2012 21:55

Well our air pistols were kept in my room in locked cases and carried by me to practices and competitions.Now-30 years on my dc are wonderful adults with their own dc-and,fwiw, no interest in shooting.It is all about responsibility.

Whatmeworry · 06/05/2012 21:55

All the boys had air rifles when I grew up. So long as they are taught to use safely there is no imcreased danger, in the country boys of 15 are expected to be able to use a shotgun, never mind a piffly air rifle.

Cotton wool society.

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