I was in Tesco's this afternoon and a man

[ExitPursuedByABear]

farted, loudly, whilst I was behind him .

Lots of people in front of him in the aisle, but just me behind him, and he let rip.

I was too surprised to come up with a decent remark so I just walked past him sporting my best cat's bum face.

AIBU for shopping in Tesco? Does this sort of thing happen in other supermarkets?

I think a loud cough to mask a trump is only polite.
I think you should shop at Waitrose, people who go there never, ever fart.

In Iceland people poo in the aisles.

I love the word "parp".😍

Manicbmc - that could have been my dh, he does that sort of thing.

I asked him once if he farts loudly at work, etc and he said yes. He says if he needs to he'll do it no matter where he is. He reckons he'd explode if he tried to keep it in.

My 4 month son farted a few weeks ago when he was half asleep and scared himself! It was so loud and he just went into shock mode and then screamed. That was funny, wasn't in tesco though.

In Tesco with my mother a few years ago, she suddenly leant towards me and whispered 'walk away quickly and don't say a word'. I was a bit until she explained when we'd cleared the area that she'd dropped a silent one and didn't want to get the blame!

Farts are neither funny nor thread-worthy. Just sayin'.

I was in WH Smith looking at magazines. I had to crouch down to look at the ones I was interested in. A lady standing beside, all twin set and pearls let out the loudest rip roaring fart - right at my face level.
She was totally unfazed by the fact everyone stared, I toppled over in an attempt to flee the blast (I have arthritis so not so nimble at parp avoidance) and my ds was literally helpless with laughter.

I let one slip in Asda once. I find it a useful tool when you can't get near the reduced section!

Oh i hope it wasn't my OH.

We were in Tesco a few months back looking for jeans for him, and he was messing about saying "just hold this shirt up to my back. I dont know why, but my parents used to do it so it must do something" and generally being a wally.

He asked me to hold up the jeans, so i did as asked. He proceeded to fart RIGHT into the jeans. Que catsbumface from the female employee walking past at the time.

I was horrified. I just left him cracking up in a corner. He thought he was hilarious

"happybubblebrain Fri 04-May-12 17:48:32

In Iceland people poo in the aisles."

PLEASE tell me that was a joke

what's a cats bum face......? i've had that before, someone has let one slip near me when in a supermarket. don't know if to laugh or cry? the thought of smelling a strangers fart, or anyone's cttoi makes me want to up chuck :D

I thought it was only legal to urinate on the back wheels of the car.

Farts are immensely funny and definitely threadworthy-just saying~!

I find it a useful tool when you can't get near the reduced section!

Excellent idea!

Ive been known to 'forget myself' as I walk down the street wearing my ipod, I cant hear it so I sort of forget that everyone else can now I usually have a quick glance behind to check.

crying with laughter

Yes Amber when out walking the dog, I check.

Although letting one out whilst riding can have a strange effect on the horse.

Just saying.

Laughing so much, DS wants to know what's up...

LentillyFart - (aptly named) the reduced section gained you spontaneous applause!

just noticed that username [Lentillyfart]

Hecate I think there has been a thread about people pooing in shops, although I thought it was in a changing room.

Nothing to do with me of course.

Well look - everybody needs to let out gas or they will explode feel very uncomfortable. Law of averages say this will happen sometimes in supermarkets. Lets all try and be adults about this!

I bet it was my DH, he lets them slip and truly believes no one notices!

But, reminded me, the other week, I was in Sainsburys with DS, 3, who was sat in the trolley, we were packing up and the most blood curdling smell wafted all around us, now me being polite decided to ignore it and carry on, the bloody woman behind me asked if my DS had had an accident, no, he had`nt, then she turned round to everyone and said I think the little boy has parped, then it dawned, she had let rip and decided to blame DS. Now, I know my DSs farts and smells and no way was this him, it was a fully brewed adult one. I was so grrr about it, I told her it wasnt him but by this time the whole of sainsburys thought it was him and were holding there noses. I held my head high as I left, knowing that both me and her knew the truth.

I was fuming all afternoon about it, mumbling to anyone who would listen.

their not there, see grrrr