to have a peek in a visiting childs bookbag?

[canthelplooking]

Just out of curiosity really. Interesting to know how other children are getting on compared to DD.

I do all of the above! no shame me.

I'm not going to say I'm a saintly person without a grain of competitiveness, but I doubt I'll be snooping through bookbags when the time comes. It isn't necessary. It's not like Kera's ability to spell phantasmagorical would mean the teacher takes Jimmy's gold star away for getting all his spellings right this week.

Besides, I was taught to read relatively late. Possibly even as late as seven! Within a year, relatives started challenging my small self when I innocently answered their patronising questions on whether I'd been reading, and what. "No Jessie, what have you been reading? Not what has Mummy been reading? Jessie, can you read it for me then?"

Actually, reading that back, I suddenly understand why my mother was so furious afterwards.

anyone who professes smug innocence of such thoughts, well they don't live in London

I live in London. What's your point, Itcouldhappentoanymum?

It would never occur to me to do that. Honestly.

If my DS was invited to tea, I will tell him to leave his book bag at school. AfricanExport if agreed in advance I would be happy for another parent to supervise homework.

I don't care if people know what reading level DS is on. Reading detailed learning records and reports is another matter.

I never did homework with them on an after school playmate! It was for play. I wouldn't have sent my DC off to someone else's house to do homework- what a strange idea!
I also can't see why DCs are exempt from normal privacy rules. At what age would you call it prying-10, 14- or are you still doing it with adults? Is it OK because they don't know or because they are not going to tackle an adult about unacceptable behaviour?

I would Eggrules, especially if you live in London!

I live in London and it wouldn't cross my mind. Why does where you live make a difference?

I was going to say YANBU . Then I thought I have had the opportunity loads of times and never done it.

TBH we all know roughly where the kids are in terms of ability. I would only do homework or reading with a child that I had been specifically asked to.

DDs homework diary is also the contact book where we are supposed to write information we want the teachers to read. Some of which, in my case, is sensitive - not confidential as such but not something I'd be comfortable with a nosy parent reading.

This is why I send notes in sealed envelopes.

Would you open them too?

A few parents are very competitive and I admit to being over-sensitive to this issue. I have been at both ends of the spectrum in terms of how my DS is doing.

DS really struggled in nursery and I was surprised that parents mentioned anything about how he was getting on in comparison to others. At first I felt guilty for not being more aware; I now know they are obsessed and anxious.

DS is nearly at the end of Reception and this year has made a made a huge difference. He is not gifted but is, (according to teaching staff) well ahead of his peers. He tends to skip ahead and then level out and I fully expect him to be average at a point in the near future. He is miles happier and so .

Earlier this week my DS and another boy had their learning records swapped. It didn't occur to me that this information would be read by anyone other than teaching staff and ourselves and so I am a bit embarrassed. I get the feeling that the child's father has read the comments. He may well be anxious but has read a progress report at a peak IFKWIM.

Parents are not allowed to help out in a class that their children attend and this is something I fully support. One parent does supply teaching in the class and that is fine by me.

I really don't mind if people know what reading level DS is on. It is often the most obvious way to rate and compare progress but it is only part of the curriculum.

I was surprised to learn that some people think it's ok to look at other childrens' books out on the table at parents' evening too.

I have never understood why anyone would be remotely interested.

First read as "having a pee in...." now that WOULD be U. Never really got this competitive clever kid thing, I have one clever one thick who cares?

Getting the books out to check them would be the most evil thing ever done in the world since evil was invented in the late 1920s.

However, if you less than half opened the bag and peeked inside, possibly with a torch, that would only be a little bit wrong.

Less than half remember. 50% opened or above is EVIL!

it's dead sad to do this, maybe you need a job op

Hyperbole doesn't make it all right either. I don't think anyone was trying to claim it was "the most outrageous intrusive thing ever done by anyone", nor yet "the crime of the century". It's still wrong. Not OMG should be hung for it wrong. Just wrong.

(I'd want to clock someone for rummaging in my child's bag without a damn' good reason, even though I admit that violence really is a crime, whereas violating privacy is at worst a civil offence.)

Librarian, you can be forgiven as you were trying to be helpful. (Innocent face with halo emoticon, like Roger Moore in The Saint.)

ps Not aimed at you Tiggy, yours was funny!

It really doesn't matter what reading book another child has.
Some children are under enormous pressure to race through the reading scheme and it doesn't do them any favours.

The only time I would enquire what a child might be reading would be to encourage my ds to read more. It would be more alone the lines of what author/book could inspire ds to read. He is at senior school though.
On a lighter note could any posters who spoke about cleaning shoes please enlighten me as to where abouts this woman lives as I would be more than happy to send all 3 dcs there for tea, along with a vast array of dirty school shoes!!!!

Looking in another child's book bag is about as helpful as looking in the book bag of a child on the other side of the world. Totally pointless.

I think it is a joke. If it is real YABVVVVVFU. I would never ever do that ever. Why the heck would I, it's just weird freakery..

Oh for gods sake why are parents so competitive with their children? Its so odd! Why does it matter how the other child compares with your DC? Parents like this end up fucking their kids up!

Its a book for christs sake!

Why would anyone want to know how their child is doing in comparison to another child?

Because they are weird sparkling and like to make everything into a competition!

Oh right puds. I can't be arsed with competitive parenting TBH.

I have said this before but there was one Mum in Reception who would invite other children for tea. How nice. Only while they were there she would give them a spelling test and do a bit of maths. Just to check her child was ahead of them.

We only found out about a year later.......