Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

MIL wants to take ds on hot air balloon

175 replies

hellenback · 23/04/2012 14:58

I'm not keen - he is 13 - dd much younger not invited - MIL in 70's and not fit or active! Using all usual old lady tactics to get my consent but hanging tough - as what if something awful happens???? Son cross with me - when he's 18 he can make own choices. Am I the baddy???? DH on fence! She's been nagging now for 3 years!!!! Why won't she drop it and take her DD instead????

OP posts:
Chopstheduck · 24/04/2012 06:45

I've got mine booked with Virgin and it says

'Children must be aged seven or over and at least 4ft 6in (1.4m) tall.'

piedpiper4 · 24/04/2012 06:58

We took our 7 year old dd last year and she loved it.....and we loved that she was able to share something special with us too. Let him go, he'll have a great time.

nooka · 24/04/2012 07:01

I think that the problem with saying that he can't go until he is 18 is that this may well mean that it never happens. Either because MIL has died by then or is too frail. I'm guessing that as this has been somethign your MIL has been talking about for a few years your MIL has a particular wish to do this with your ds - is it a shared interest perhaps?

seeker · 24/04/2012 07:08

I think it's so important not to our own irrational fears hold our children back. You hear it so often on here, and the "your child your rules" brigade always barrel in in support of the fearful.

I nearly died in a riding accident as a child- you can imagine how I feel when I watch my dd cheerfully cantering her pony over jumps with no reins or stirrups. Would I like to stop her? Too bloody right! Should I? Absolutely no! And I should drag my face into a smile and laugh and congratulate her- and do my hyperventilating in private!

GingerPCatt · 24/04/2012 07:16

My grandfather went in a hot air balloon ride for his 90th birthday - his choice it wasn't a bid for the inheritance. He loved it.

GonnaBuildAHouse · 24/04/2012 07:42

I think that ultimately it should be the 13 year olds choice, his parents should have been consulted about it before.

seeker · 24/04/2012 07:47

Why should a grandparent consult the parents before hand? Would they be expected to consult before telling the children they were going to take them to the zoo?

GrossePopel · 24/04/2012 08:27

Actually seeker I think going to the zoo is entirely different to a hot air balloon ride. There is a risk involved in hot air ballooning and therefore the Grandparent cannot and should not take them up without the permission of the Parent.

My Dad is a pilot, a good one, flying professionally for over 30 years. If he took my son up in a helicopter without my permission, I'd be furious.

Only a parent can decide what controlled risks they allow their child to take part in. I did a tandem skydive attached to my Dad's friend at 14. Because I wanted to and my parents weighed up the risk vs the experience and consented.

Driving to the zoo (although we all know risks involved in driving) is entirely different.

lesley33 · 24/04/2012 08:58

I suspect it is more risky to drive to the zoo than go in a hot air baloon flown by a commercial pilot in the UK.

olgaga · 24/04/2012 09:34

I think perhaps OP would feel a bit differently if she or her DH had also been invited. Why not get yourself/DH a ticket and go too OP? Some of us just don't like the thought of our children being without a parent if a difficult situation arises - there's absolutely nothing wrong with that!

It's not just the thought of a horrible death in an inferno. The landings can be tricky and not everyone can hold on tightly enough to stabilise their own weight - causing injury to themselves and others. To be honest, I'd be more worried about the MIL than your son.

This is an extract from a report on an accident in Derbyshire in 2011:

As the flight progressed towards the high ground, the windspeed increased and the pilot elected to land. However, he was unable to do so until the balloon had cleared the obstacles on the ground. The passengers had all been briefed and instructed on how to adopt the landing position and this was called for by thepilot during the approach. The injured passengers had all adopted the landing position but the impact with the wall was immediately below their corner of the basket and this caused the injuries. The female passenger, who broke both her legs, was 64 years of age and had no medical history that may have contributed to her injuries.

In a report on a hot air balloon accident involving G-KTKT, published in AAIB Bulletin 8/2010, a reference is made to the number of ballooning accidents which have resulted in ?serious injury? and that in a significant proportion of these reports, the injured passenger was described as ?elderly?.
www.aaib.gov.uk/cms_resources.cfm?file=/Cameron%20Z-275%20hot%20air%20balloon%20G-CBZZ%2002-12.pdf

Extracts from the safety regulations:

"Balloon landings can take place at unprepared
sites and may occasionally be bumpy for the
occupants, especially in higher wind conditions if
the basket tips over and drags along the ground.
At present, not all commercial balloon operators
make passengers aware of this, either at the
booking stage or prior to a flight. Therefore, it is
recommended that the Civil Aviation Authority
require all commercial balloon operators to make
prospective passengers aware of the varied nature
of balloon landings so that they can make an
informed decision as to whether or not to undertake
a flight. (Safety Recommendation 2010-052)"

"Operators should ensure that prospective
passengers are aware that ballooning is an
outdoor activity, normally occurring in the open
countryside, requiring a degree of fitness and
activeness from participants."

Virgin do not allow anyone under 16 unless they are accompanied by a responsible adult, and frankly a 70 year old would probably not fit the bill.

runningforthebusinheels · 24/04/2012 10:39

Well, reading that would scare the willies out of anyone - but lets not forget that you could die in an inferno in a car crash on the way to the balloon flight.

Personally, I would allow my 13 yr old to go, but I would prefer to accompany them. I would be more concerned about the MIL if she is frail, as, for landing, you do need to be able to grip a leather strap and assume a 'brace' position with your knees bent, and hold that position for a while.

My own father (who we are taking up) is 70, but a very fit, slender and agile 70, so I've no worries about him.

seeker · 24/04/2012 11:33

"Virgin do not allow anyone under 16 unless they are accompanied by a responsible adult, and frankly a 70 year old would probably not fit the bill."

Excuse me? Did I just read that? a 70 year old is not a responsible adult? Jesus wept- I've heard everything now!

upahill · 24/04/2012 11:39

I loved my suprise ballon flight over the Lake District the other year.
DS 1 and 2 were only 9 and 6 at the time so they were 'helpers'

Now that they are older and if they were allowed, now I know what is involved I would definatly let them go. Really good expeirence.

I let DS1 go scuba diving in the ocean when he was 11 and he has driven powerful cars round race circuits. I know things could go wrong but I way up the risk , obviously if it is a bad or high risk I don't let them do it but if saftey precautions are in place and there are expierences, passionate, qualified and licenced staff then I go ahead.

olgaga · 24/04/2012 13:24

Excuse me? Did I just read that? a 70 year old is not a responsible adult? Jesus wept- I've heard everything now!

Calm down seeker, note the context:

"requiring a degree of fitness and activeness from participants."

and as the OP said: "MIL in 70's and not fit or active!"

It would depend entirely on the individual - obviously!

seeker · 24/04/2012 13:35

But it's not "responsible" as in having to carry the bloody basket, it's responsible as in being responsible for him behaving properly.

Presumably the balloon company is happy to take the MIl concerned ( had to be a MIL, didn't it- cows they are,wanting to share a fun trip wth their grandsons) then there isn't a problem. He's not a toddler who'd have to be restrained.

MoreBeta · 24/04/2012 13:47

I guess its one of those things like parachute jumping, bungey jumping, paragliding, white water rafting or any number of 'thrill' activities.

Not for me. I don't need the thrill but they don't actually cause many deaths.

We have hot hair balloons taking off near where we live. Its not really dangerous at all and very well organised. That said, a hot air balloon did crash land on our farm when I was a child. Clipped a tree as it came down, then went through a barbed wire fence (along with passengers) as it was dragged along the ground by the wind.

bruffin · 24/04/2012 13:52

My mum went on a balloon ride a couple of years ago. She is in her 70s and not very fit or active. She loved it! I think it did get put off a few times because of the weather.

olgaga · 24/04/2012 13:56

No it isn't just about her being responsible for him behaving properly or restraining him!

As I said, it depends on the individual. It's up to the pilot to decide whether she is fit to participate. If they decide she can't he would have no responsible adult to accompany him. So he wouldn't be able to go anyway.

I wonder if MIL even realises she will have to clamber in and out of the basket. That's why my suggestion is that the OP or the DH go too.

hellenback · 24/04/2012 14:02

Good idea - olgaga - will get DH up too - then she has both our boys - and the biggun can help her if needed cos my landing was well bumpy and a few went flying as we were dragged along ground. DH can also assist her in and out as I don't think she will have thought that one through bless.

OP posts:
seeker · 24/04/2012 14:04

"No it isn't just about her being responsible for him behaving properly or restraining him! "

What is it about then?

OrmIrian · 24/04/2012 14:07

Wow! Lucky boy. I'd say I'm envious but TBH I know my head for heights is non-existent.

is there a risk? Of course there is but I am guessing it's well-supervised these days.

Yes, I think YABU but I guess it has to be your choice.

olgaga · 24/04/2012 14:23

What is it about then?

seeker read this slowly, OK? It's about her fitness to take the flight. That is decided by the operator/pilot. They are unlikely to take any risks because, as I explained in my post at 9.34, most serious injuries have been experienced by elderly passengers. Go back and read it! It's about the bumpy landing, and the ability to sustain the brace position, and the fact that elderly people are more likely to sustain impact injuries. Plus, if she is not allowed on, there would be no responsible adult to accompany GS. Got that? Nothing to do with whether 70 year olds are "responsible".

hellenback thank goodness you at least understand what I'm getting at - happy to have been of assistance!

porcamiseria · 24/04/2012 15:14

yanbu

I am very risk averse and I think they are dangerous

seeker · 24/04/2012 15:26

You may be very risk averse, but you have no right to impose this attitude on your children

olgaga · 24/04/2012 15:37

you have no right to impose this attitude on your children

And you have no right to absolve yourself of your responsibility to your children.

Swipe left for the next trending thread