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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU: I don't want my cleaner to bring her child to work

179 replies

wouldwelcomeadvice · 16/04/2012 15:32

The cleaner has brought her child (age 6) into the country in the last few days and she is not yet registered at a school. She has brought her to work, in my house, today without asking me first. The child has been coughing away. I have three children and I don't need them getting ill. The child is well behaved and has just fallen asleep on the couch. AIBU. I just don't want any more bodies in my house.

OP posts:
WhereEaglesDare · 16/04/2012 18:02

YANBU if she spends half of the time attending her dc but if there is no interference then no,i wouldn't mind.Some health and safety issues would be there ..... But that is my opinion.
If you are not happy,then deal with it accordingly ...I only don't like when op has problem, and response is not what op was expecting-op then comes with all this other info likeshe is not good cleaner...It irritates hell out of me...
Honestly-what's next-are you missing something-did she take something?????Hmm
Sorry about rant.....

WhereEaglesDare · 16/04/2012 18:03

You don't like it-you are employer-you know what you want. Simple!!!

LadyClariceCannockMonty · 16/04/2012 18:04

People seem to be jumping to conclusions about the child having TB, even though the OP hasn't said so.

And I wonder if the OP would have mentioned the child 'coughing away' if the cleaner and her daughter weren't from another country?

Of course the cleaner ought to have asked about bringing her child to work, but not doing so is not the biggest crime on earth. The OP can't even muster up a more robust reason for not wanting her there than that she is an extra 'body' Hmm in the house (and, by implication, that she might have some dreadful disease, because 6-year-old kids never just, y'know, have a cough).

I could already imagine from the OP why the cleaner might have felt unable to ask, and after some of these responses it seems even clearer.

WhereEaglesDare · 16/04/2012 18:06

Well said LadyClariceCannockMonty

OhDoAdmitMrsDeVere · 16/04/2012 18:09

TB? Shock

OhDoAdmitMrsDeVere · 16/04/2012 18:11

Even if she DID have TB Hmm x 100000000

Having a little cough on the OP's sofa is very unlikely to give it to anyone else.

I am more likely to get it whilst travelling on the bus.

LoopyLoopsTootTootToots · 16/04/2012 18:12

Oh of course, TB Hmm

penguinsoup · 16/04/2012 18:14

Yeah, TB indeed.

fedupofnamechanging · 16/04/2012 18:16

I mentioned the tb thing because I think the OP is thinking it and skirting around actually saying it. Apologies OP, if I'm wrong.

I'm not jumping to conclusions that she has it - just saying that if she was from a country where it is still common, the thought would occur to me and I would worry about it. Even if it is just a cough, when you are paying someone to provide a service (and make your life easier), for them to bring a sick child into your home doesn't make your life easier - it just gives you more stuff to stress about.

takingiteasy · 16/04/2012 18:20

YANBU, she is there to do a job. I go to my work to do my job and am paid to do so, without my DS in tow. It's a no brainer surely?

penguinsoup · 16/04/2012 18:21

There's only one thing for it and that's to employ a cleaner from Hertfordshire with nice, shiny, non TB riddled children.

LadyClariceCannockMonty · 16/04/2012 18:22

Grin penguin.

VickityBoo · 16/04/2012 18:24

Mum used to clean for a family while I was at school to earn a household contribution. I remember well being taken with her when I wasn't at school. What other options are there? Has I not gone with her then she wouldn't have been able to work, their home wouldn't have been cleaned and mum wouldn't have earned the much needed money that day.

I expect she already had an agreement with the home owners that if required I could tag along.

We took videos to watch or I'd sit and watch morning tv or read for the few hours.

EnjoyResponsibly · 16/04/2012 18:24

As with any employee, the reasonable thing to do is discuss their work with them if it's not meeting your expectations.

In the cleaners case it would have been a better idea to ask you if the child could come and sit quietly whilst she worked, given the extraordinary circumstances.

But frankly, if I was her I'd be popping a note in the newsagent window sharpish so I didn't have to work for someone with an attitude like you OP.

Mishy1234 · 16/04/2012 18:27

YANBU to be irritated, she should have asked you first. Also, does it not have insurance implications? If something happened to the child on your property, would you be liable?

I do agree that you could afford her some slack under the circumstances though. If it's a short term arrangement then I think I'd just let it slide.

The guy who comes to cut our grass brings his kids with him in the school holidays. It did irritate me a bit the first couple of times, as they were playing with their scooters on the pavement (we live on a very busy road) and I was worried for their safety. However, I have since taken the stick out of my arse and if we're around when they come they just come in and play in the garden. DS loves it (they are a couple of years older) and they are great girls. For the half an hour they are here, I really enjoy their company.

penguinsoup · 16/04/2012 18:30

Aaargh LoopyLoops MY EYES.

You couldn't love him if you reared him could you?

mynewpassion · 16/04/2012 18:37

I've seen parents take their kids into the office for an hour or two if there was an emergency. The kids were good. The dad gave them some paper to draw and they sat in the conference room while dad made some phone calls.

No biggie. It was actually a nice distraction.

OhDoAdmitMrsDeVere · 16/04/2012 18:42

Even the most basic home insurance includes about a Million in personal liability.

I am pretty small one small tb ridden child would be covered by this.

OhDoAdmitMrsDeVere · 16/04/2012 18:45

I was called in for yet another pointless meeting on one of my non work days.
It was one time too many so I took DC5.
He ensured that that particular meeting didnt overrun.

I have had to take DCs into work over the years. Some jobs it was ok, others I didnt think it would do.

Like when I did nightshifts in an inner london A&E for example. Didnt really want DD sat colouring in the waiting room.
Office job for organisation supporting parents - fine.

MarianneM · 16/04/2012 18:51

This reply has been deleted

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Mrsjay · 16/04/2012 18:52

she should have asked you , however her child is recently in the country i guess mum wanted to have a better life in this country so is working for you , perhaps she doesnt trust/know anybody to look after her child , i think you are being a bit mean , perhaps you could suggest a childminder but i dont think she could afford it and would need to leave her job , has she seen about local schools , I used to go with my mum a single parent , in the summer holidays to her cleaning jobs when she didnt have anybody to look after her ,

Mrsjay · 16/04/2012 18:53

after me *

CelstialNavigation · 16/04/2012 18:57

I've tried 5 times to write a post on this thread and I keep having to delete it. I have no understanding of why someone would even feel irked to have the child briefly in their home under these particular circumstances. Confused

iscream · 16/04/2012 18:59

The only part that would bother me is that she has a couch. I don't let sick people in my home. I am afraid I would have had to ask her to leave. (not fire her, just leave with sick child)

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