adults with learning difficulties on small childrens' play area.

[Bethshine82]

Took DS to the play area on Friday, it is not a huge play area and has one of those signs saying it is designed for use by children 14 and under.
Whilst we were there a group of around eight adults with learning difficulties and their carers arrived. The adults proceeded to go onto the playground.
AIBU to think this isn't very fair? They were adults and they weren't really aware of their strength and size. The carers weren't supervising brilliantly and twice I saw one of the adults just shove the children out of the way. Also some of the adults were shouting and screaming which frightened some of the toddlers. Many of the children left. I'm not in any way suggesting that adults with learning difficulties shouldn't be able to go out and enjoy themselves or that they shouldn't be part of the community, I'm just not sure a small childrens' play area is the place for an adults' afternoon out.

I think that the playground should only be used by children, it isn't safe otherwise really. AIBU?

I read that one too Mavisin fact I've them all.
I thought you made a good point.

Please, those with children with ld, realise that I would have preferred for any group of adults to not be using the play area for toddlers. Not specific to those with ld. Any large group. I mentioned the fact it was a group with ld as it was clear that it was a trip that had been organised for them, they had not taken it upon themselves. It was an issue with the carers not the adults with ld if anything.

I am so sorry if this has made people feel sad and angry. I wish I had worded my op differently.

"But I don't think segregating adults (or children) with learning difficulties is the answer. What is? Well, wider understanding and support across society and for anyone who sees carers not doing their job to step in and say something, for everyone's well being, but particularly those of the vulnerable adults."

I don't think that asking for separate play times for adults and small children on play equipment is a demand for segregation.

Wider understanding and support is great, but it won't change the fact that play equipment is not fun for anyone if they are to be supervised "properly" in the way that people here seem to be suggesting.

Surely adults for whom toddler play equipment is developmentally appropriate need to be able to use it without constant hovering in case they accidentally knock over, or crush, a small child.

Given that the thing that sets that equipment apart is its tiny scale, I struggle to imagine how any adult could get much enjoyment out of it, but I bow to the greater knowledge of those who claim they do.

But being at the playground is fun because you get to run about and try to do stuff you're not sure you'll manage, and sometimes you'll fall and others you'll get stuck.

How can adults do those things safely with small children about?

What is the point of anyone being there if they have to be so closely supervised because of the risks they pose to one another?

TSC refuse to be bullied.....you're coming over as totally unreasonable by saying things like you just did. I SAID NOTHING like that which you imply and you know it.

Of course, the other reason for having special areas for small children is to keep the little sods off out of the good bits of the playground so that bigger kids can use it without constantly having to "be careful of the little ones!"

Small children play areas are as much about containment of the small-limbed menace as anything else.

I thought people were in favour of toddler segregation.

Awkward - she's just enjoying getting plaudits and flowers, of course she's misrepresenting you, anyone can see that.

I totally agree with missmavis re lack of facilities... Even in places supposed to be designed to give support "the powers that be" oftne deem that equipment and activities appropriate to age are provided. If the people concerned do not want / appreciate the activity and are not physically / cognitively capable of doing it they are stuck ........ even when they would actually be far more active / involved in developmentally appropriate activities.

Our local softplay has an age limit (14yrs I think), but on a big sign with all the 'softplay rules' it states that adults are allowed on the equipment during school hours when it is quieter so I think yabu if the softplay wasn't too busy.

*TSC WHERE DID I SAY THAT CHILDREN WITH SN SHOULD NOT TRAVEL WITH OTHERS?????

THIS THREAD HAS MADE ME FUCKING LIVID! MY POST WAS ABOUT AN ADULT AND I HAVE ONLY SPOKEN ABOUT ADULTS!*

DD1 is 8. She has a developmental age of about 9 months and that's unlikely to improve much, ever. She is about as harmless, and come to that, as vulnerable a child as you can imagine. She has brittle bones. She has limited vision. She is paralysed down one side of her body: she can't catch herself when she trips over the things she can't see with the foot she drags on the ground. But she loves nothing more than to totter about, eg at the park. She cannot communicate meaningfully (that's not likely to change either) she cannot run away, or tell you if anyone has hurt her, and she is far too loving and affectionate to avoid someone if they do hurt her. She is more likely to just kiss them in the hope it makes them nice to her in future. But in one respect, she is very very lucky. She is loved by everyone who knows her, because she is ridiculously cute. She has pale skin and blonde hair and huge blue eyes with black lashes and is an absolutely gorgeous cuddly child and people just want to protect her.

When she is an adult, nothing about her will change - she will still be incredibly frail and absolutely dependant on others, and I imagine still completely loving and trusting, regardless of how she is treated - and importantly, inside she will still be 9 months old and she will still be my baby - but she won't be "cute" any more. So in the eyes of the world she'll be different, and she'll be treated differently. Which is a shame, because the swings at the park are one of the very very few things in the world that put a smile on her beautiful face.

The biscuit and flowers were for TSC obv.

R3DH well I hope that you understand how my posts on here from early on have been terribly mis appropriated by people with little empathy and llittle unerstanding. I have nothing but compassion for ANYBODY who has to struggle in life. BUt I will not be bullied by people making me out to be some evil person because I felt that an adult with tendancies to lashing out at babies might be better off with more supervision or in a private vehicle.

THAT WAS ALL I SAID PEOPLE.

With respect I would not imagine TSC is enjoying any of this. I for one cannot pretend to imagine what she goes through. I am sorry for that.

You have to do something with the anger and sometimes it will go the wrong way but I'm certain it isn't about flowers.

sorry, completely x posts with you as I was catching up

I retract my previous post actually, I think the ban on nt adults playing on the softplay after school hours is fine but shouldn't be applied to those adults with ld as there isn't much on offer for adults with ld, where as there is plenty of other activities for nt adults to do outwith school hours, and maybe if more nt children were around those with ld more often such as play centres then it would raise awareness and acceptance of those with additional needs/learning difficulties, so I still think yabu op :-)

You've acheived what you wanted TSC now stop talking to me because you're not someone I would ever, ever talk to irl...you'r attitude makes that plain.

AND I won't let you bully me off thread either. I left it once but seeing people talk about me once I had gone and misrepresent me in my abscence I though...nah...I'm going back to defend myself.

Point taken, Awkward Mary. And all I am saying (I think, I'm sure you've worked out after just a few posts that this is a horribly emotive area for some of us and it's hard to be sure that it still makes sense when it hits the page) is that the line between "child" and "adult" is a murky and confusing one in the world of LD. In some cases it's clear enough, and quite right too, and in that case it's important to treat the individual as an adult with attendant rights and expectations. But in others you've got what is effectively still a child, a baby even, suddenly prevented from accessing children's services & support by their inconveniently adult body. So I think you have to talk about the actual risk posed by/to each individual (based on many things and yes, that includes strength and weight regardless of age though in DD1's case those would both be irrelevant) more than talking about an "Adult" v a "Child". "Adult" is too tricky a word in this context, and generalisations about what Adults are allowed to do will often be unfair.

Awkward (genuine question) do you have much experience of people with SLD's, because if someone had said that to me I think I would have just thank for the warning and turned my back towards the carer plus adult. Or asked what was likely to make her lash out (my friend's dd for example doesn't like babies because they make unpredictable loud noises & she is very noise sensitive, she wouldn't hurt a baby but she might shout things at a baby - but only if they cried). I suppose i've spent years around teens with ld's who 'might' lash out - some do only go out with 2:1 support and harnessed- but have yet to be hit by anyone other than ds1 and he only goes for me when very cross (he usually attacks himself first). Ds1 obviously spends most of his time around teens and young adults with ld's and has been physically hurt once, and has never hurt any of his peers.

People with ld's are far more at risk from nt's than the other way round. They're a very vulnerable group.

AwkwardMary - just to add another voice to those people trying to follow this thread that can clearly see how you have been rounded on and completely misrepresented. Not everyone reading this is so narrow minded with their opinions that they can't consider any situation other than their own.