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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask why life is so expensive?

217 replies

clam · 12/04/2012 21:20

It's just one thing after another. We're on a more-than-reasonable income, yet if I feel we're struggling to stick within our means, how the hell are others on a lower budget coping?
Every month I think things will calm down, but this month alone we have haircuts needed for all, a trip to the vet (£60) 2 dental hygienist appointments (£50 each!!!!!) and a check up (£35, no NHS available), new tyres needed for the car, MOT coming up, dd has only one pair of wearable shoes other than school ones, ditto ds and his feet have grown, ds theatre trip for drama GCSE, next installment of dd's school residential trip, music lesson fees due for the new term, exam fee, plus we have to pay the accompanist.... you get the picture. Plus I forgot to pay off the sodding credit card last month so just got hit with a late payment fee, plus interest. Angry

OP posts:
OrmIrian · 13/04/2012 11:39

Clam - I am with you 100%. We don't exactly have a wildly extravagant lifestyle - never holiday abroad, one second-hand car, clothes are all cheap brands or charity shops etc blah blah blah. it isn't about saving money. We all know how to do that. We could get rid of dog and cats to save a fortune. We could have said no to DS1's outrageously expensive school trip, we could have told the DC they couldn't go to the cinema in the holidays. We could have done all those things. Of course we could. But the point is that a year or so ago those things were easily affordable without having to worry too much. Now they aren't and while the children are still getting things they need, DH and I are not. And it seems absurd since our income hasn't gone down. And like you I wonder how those who were already hanging on by the skin of their teeth are coping. It's shit. And I am getting seriously fed up.

OrmIrian · 13/04/2012 11:40

We also have an excel spreadsheet. Have done for years since I had to manage our budget when I was on mat leave. It's helpful in showing me exactly how much money we don't have Hmm

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 13/04/2012 11:45

Orm - exactly.

DH and I have been very fortunate in that our income has increased a fair bit in the last 3 years. But our standard of living certainly hasn't gone up in the same way, far from it.
Yes we now have 2 small children, but our weekly grocery shop has increased by 50% just to maintain the same kinds of foods that we were eating before.

Original poster
clam · 13/04/2012 11:49

And what some people consider a necessity, another will view it as a luxury.
And often you simply can't tell the whole story from the outside. So you can look at my ds with his Abercrombie top and smart phone, and think "spoiled brat," but not know that the top was a gift (cut price from US godmother) and the phone a cast-off that is pay-as-you-go and he seldom uses it so costs me him very little.

OP posts:
margoandjerry · 13/04/2012 11:50

FredFredGeorge, as a citydweller, may I introduce to the concept of £4ph to park when my mum (who has a disabled badge) comes to visit me. She gets 1 free hour because of her badge but the rest is £4ph. When I visit her it's the same but worse because you pay even on a Sunday.

porcamiseria · 13/04/2012 12:03

mee toooooo

thanks fuck my interest only goes down in june (yipee) but then after a break wll move to repayment even more expoensive! c'est la vie my friend

TheNightIsDarkAndFullOfTerrors · 13/04/2012 12:08

clam, but I suppose you are lucky that you don't need to sell the gifts your DS gets and have a cast-off smart phone.

But I do agree with you. Living - food and heating, petrol to go to work, housing, is frighteningly expensive. The welfare reform bill and the introduction of universal credit is going to make things even worse for those on smaller salaries and / or with disabled children.

I don't know what people are going to do Sad

LadyThompson · 13/04/2012 12:11

Agree with OP. And with Orm's post of 11.39. Things we were able to afford as a matter of course (not even luxuries, particularly) are now quite hard won. We run one deeply crap old car and try not to use it when the bus is possible, but petrol is so dear (for example). Utility bills are through the roof. Groceries seem to go up in price very frequently. Etc etc etc....

totallyskint · 13/04/2012 12:30

It's just one thing after another. We're on a more-than-reasonable income, yet if I feel we're struggling to stick within our means, how the hell are others on a lower budget coping?

I was you a couple of years ago.

Now it's

dishwasher broken = too bad, have to do without
need a haircut = too bad, have to do without
food prices up = resorting to instant noodles or doing without

etc

And, like you, I wonder how it must be for people on tighter budgets than me. Not good, I'm sure.

I am seriously considering the Amish lifestyle...

LST · 13/04/2012 12:34

We struggle to get essentials let alone haircuts!!! But YANBU.

NiceHamione · 13/04/2012 12:41

I suspect lots of us do not have the lifestyle that we thought we would have.

I would question the idea of cheap rent tbh, particularly in cities.

Our dishwasher is broke, so we are doing without.
I have my hair cut regularly but go to quite a cheap salon whereas a few years ago I paid a lot more.
We would also pay for music lessons and trips but would make cutbacks elsewhere to pay for them.

Sparklingbrook · 13/04/2012 12:50

Pets cost a fortune too. We have one cat, and she costs enough. I don't know how people afford to keep 2/3 large dogs etc.

NiceHamione · 13/04/2012 12:55

We have lots of animals and they do cost a lot. Although at least the chickens pay their way.

We have 2 dogs though , a lab and a springer so both with big appetites.

Sparklingbrook · 13/04/2012 12:59

Are pets luxuries though? I don't think so, I wouldn't be without Sparkling Cat, she makes me happy. But I suppose she's not an 'essential'. Sad

LST · 13/04/2012 13:02

I have 3 cats. They are my only luxury Smile

Heswall · 13/04/2012 13:02

VL has a point, we all like a moan of course we do - the suns out so I'm in happy mode today Grin
But truthfully my kids don't know they are born, most people on MN have a standard of living that allows a computer and internet access. As a child we didn't even have a telephone, had to run down the road to use a pay phone, tell that to children today and they look at you like you're out of your mind.

Rezolution · 13/04/2012 13:07

We can't afford a dog Blush I am a great dog lover (used to breed Yorkies) but at the moment we cannot afford vet's fees etc. We do have a rescue cat but she was already chipped and spayed before she came to us.
In the supermarkets I notice stuff goes up in quite big leaps. You buy a certain product every two weeks and then you go back next time and it has gone up by 50p or £1. Things never go up by just 10p any more.

TheNightIsDarkAndFullOfTerrors · 13/04/2012 13:08

I have always been adamant that we can't afford pets but DS expressed a desire for a bird-table for the robins which are visiting.

It was half-price but the food always seems to need sodding topping-up the greedy free-loading bastards bless them.

NiceHamione · 13/04/2012 13:09

Of corse pets are a luxury and I say that as someone who adores animals and wouldn't want to be without them.

I don't think that internet is a luxury anymore.

McFluffster · 13/04/2012 13:10

We're not in trouble yet but have definitely noticed food and petrol rising to a ridiculous rate.

TheNightIsDarkAndFullOfTerrors · 13/04/2012 13:19

The internet is definitely not a luxury. It is a money-saving essential.

fedupofnamechanging · 13/04/2012 13:22

When we were kids and had to run down the road to use a phone box, most of our mates were in the same boat. Today, if you didn't have internet, you'd probably be the exception, rather than the rule. My dc's school sets homework that the kids can only do via the internet, so it's seen as something that everyone has.

It's certainly not a luxury - most people need it for work or school work. And if you are struggling financially, it actually helps to do on line shopping or get insurance quotes etc on line.

Heswall · 13/04/2012 13:27

That actually annoys me about state schools, the assumption that you have internet access. We do obviously but when we had the study replastered there was a couple of weeks where the computer wasn't set up and DD couldn't do her homework online and that should not have been an issue but they made her feel like shit when she had to explain herself to the subject teacher and then head of year.

CailinDana · 13/04/2012 13:30

I think I was probably brought up in very different circumstances than most people on this thread. I do find it a bit mad that people are complaining about not affording holidays - in my mind they are a massive luxury and one that you can only afford if you are pretty darn wealthy. I would never complain about not having a holiday when I know there are people who barely have decent food. I know everyone has their own worries but to me complaining about holidays, as though you have a right to them, signals a big loss of perspective to me.

TheNightIsDarkAndFullOfTerrors · 13/04/2012 13:33

eBay, moneysavingexpert, online gas and electricity discounts, job-seeking...

For less than 2p a day.

It does piss me off when people who only use it to fuck about posting on forums and and book holidays say that it is a luxury.

It is KNOWLEDGE. So much information at your fingertips. That, IMO, is invaluable and something which has historically been denied to the poor.

A watch used to something which only a few people owned so that more free work could be had from the working class in factories. [/rant]