to be slightly uncomfortable with my friend posting a video of their 1yo ds in the bath on fb?

[Gemtubbs]

Am I wrong to feel uncomfortable about this? He is v cute and you can't see any of his bits, as he is in a baby bath seat thing. But I still felt a little weird about it being posted on the internet. AIBU to feel this way? Should I voice my feelings to the parents?

And my kids will wear clothes at the beach on a hot day because it helps protect their skin from the sun, and I do like the sweet little surfer type outfits with the little matching hats. They look really cute.

YABU for all the reasons above

I don't think you are unreasonable. Although I don't have any problems with seeing cute vids of babies having bath, internet safety is lacking and there are loads of hackers out there. I would prefer for private videos and photos to stay private.

YABU. And your agrument about not posting pictures until children are old enough to decide for themselves what to post is ludicrous. People post about thier lives and children are, for many, the biggest part of that. You aren't taking anything away from a child by sharing your precious memories and, frankly, if any child who grew up and wanted to moan about this I'd say that they were BU for seeing it from thier parent's perspective. Though I imagine such occurances to be few and far between because I believe that most people really wouldn't think much about this stuff.

"Leave it to decide for themselves," seems a really odd thing to say in this context. It's not like we're talking about ear piercing or having a baptism here. It's a simple photo!

for not* seeing it from thier Parent's perspective.

Paedophiles get off on images of children being sexually abused, as a general rule. I doubt very much that a baby in a bath is that arousing to them. If it was then children would not be abused to produce child "porn".

Also unless you have paedos as your facebook friends I think it's perfectly safe to put pics of your kids up. If you do have paedos as fb friends I think you have bigger problems!

That said, people put too many photos on facebook anyway. There is no need for all your friends to see a digital record of your daily life. By all means take a photo of your baby in the bath for your own amusement, but don't assume that the world wants to see it too.

Running around in the nude on the beach used to be perfectly normal. However now we are more aware of covering up from hot sun so it doesn't seem like the most sensible thing to do really.

I took some photos of 10 month old DS in the bath and got them printed in Boots. Was casually showing them to MIL, and she was so shocked that Boots printed them without saying anything. You couldn't even see anything.

I'm with the OP on this one.

I refuse to have a facebook account myself or allow any of my friends to post pictures of me on their own facebook pages. It's not because I'm worried about paedophiles (at the age of 34 I'm hardly of any interest to them) but because my private life does not belong on the internet in any shape or form. (I have a professional type website with pictures and contact details and have a profile on LinkedIn, but that's a different genre altogether.)

Once you put something online it's there for good, and you often have no control over what happens to it years and years down the line. Would you be happy if other people posted personal information about you online? I wouldn't. (No matter how 'innocent' that information is.) I don't do it to anyone else either, and this includes children of all ages as well as adults.

destroyed The definition of "private and personal material" varies from person to person (and I don't agree with more extreme drfinitions such as yours) but I absolutely do agree with your point that, if there is anything at all that you want kept absolutely private, don't put it on the internet.

If I have a very private conversation that I want to have, I don't even use email / text because some things I prefer to keep strictly off the record.

AutumnSummers I agree that my approach may seem overkill to many, but on weighing up the costs and benefits of facebook, I'd just rather not bother.

There are firms now specialising on removing unwanted/unflattering/harmful information of the internet - and no doubt being paid shedloads of money to do it. Why start accumulating the crap that may well bite you in the arse one day at the age of 1?

Op I think it is sad that you don't have much or any confidence in your own ability to come to a reasonable conclusion about this, but instead only feel comfortable with an 'acceptable' viewpoint.

If you wouldn't feel comfortable putting these kind of pictures on the internet, then don't. But I hope the reason you feel uncomfortable is not to do with thinking that a baby in a bath is some kind of child porn, because I think that is a terribly sad perversion of the concept of innocence of childhood.

The arguments about the longevity of Internet images have much more validity but even so, I struggle to think of any situation where my life chances would be blighted because someone saw a picture of me as a baby. Who the hell would even recognise me? I find it very hard to tell one baby apart from another.

OP, do you not realise that FB photos are NOT open for the world to see?

If the photos make you uncomfortable, then don't click/look. Definitely wouldn't say anything to the parents though - what exactly would you say? . Presumably they are fine with the photos being there, otherwise they wouldn't have posted them!

I wouldn't be posting pics of my kids in the bath on fb just because people don't really need to see that. Not all my friends on fb are close friends and family. I do not mind close friends and family seeing personal family moments, but I don't really think that my work mates or old school friends need to see them. I won't ever say anything to the parents, because after the discussions on here, I realise there's nothing wrong with posting videos of your kids in the bath on fb if you want to.

MickyDodger, it depends on the fb settings. People can share the photos to their wall, and then a whole new group of friends can see that photo. People can save the photo on their computer and post it any where else.

I like the fact that my life exists online as well as IRL. I feel connected somehow and it feels normal for me that part of my life is my online life. Privacy etc are somehow less important to me

I agree with cat girl.

i disagree with posting anything on Facebook who cares!!!

gemtubs there is the option to choose which of your friends you share pictures with. You can create lists and make things visable only to people in certain lists. For example, there are pictures that I wouldn't want my aquaintences seeing but I want to share with friends so, when uploading, I select the option to share with friends, excluding aquaintences.

It really is simple to control what you share. And if you are uncomfortable with what others are comfortable sharing, there's always the hide button...

To be fair, the OP asks if she is reasonable in feeling "slightly uncomfortable."

I wouldn't feel uncomfortable about it but I do feel slightly uncomfortable when I see children running around without a stitch on, and I can't articulate why. I think it comes from a childhood photograph of myself. I was only about 3 but the memory of that photograph makes me feel very uncomfortable, actually, and because of that I haven't taken any "naked" pics of DD and if I did, I wouldn't post them on Facebook.