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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think differently about Dh because of John Terry?

50 replies

vodkalorange · 14/03/2012 21:50

We have had another huge row about John Fucking Terry.

Dh thinks that what he has done in his personal life is seperate from his professional life. Fine.

When I asked how he thought it would be covered if a female athlete had done what JT has done he said 'it was different'.

We somehow had a row about Paula Radcliffe and how female athletes having returned to sport after having a baby is percieved, possibly held against how a male athlete who hasn't participated due to injury is seen.

We had a huge row when he said maybe JT's wife "couldn't do better", and he's stomped off now.

It's all part of the same dialogue. I am Not Valuable because what I do doesn't command respect nor is lucrative. I am Kept - it is my (thankless), task to produce functional WORTHY (male), human beings, grist to the mill, yet because I am unwaged I am of no value. John Terry's wife 'should have' left him and didn't - because she's indoctrinated, as are we all. He has value and everything he does is excusable because fine he's a cock but HE CAN STILL KICK A BALL and earn 60 grand a week. Nobody would've 'judged' her for leaving apart - really? Have you tried telling someone you want to leave YOUR marriage? What about the children! It's the woman's JOB to put up and shut up because she should be grateful and she has no value - 'self respect' is cold comfort when there is no support.

She might be getting old! Looking old! A capital crime! Perhaps she isn't APPEALING enough! SHE should 'fight' for her marriage. Because she has no value.

Some young female athletes were on Jonathan Ross a few weeks ago and he just asked if they were single and was practically dribbling on them.

Apparently the female british football team all have fulltime jobs despite being olympic-level athletes. Don't see them dressing up as richard branson.

AIBU to just be incoherantly angry about all this? and what do I DO?

OP posts:
ohdearwhatdoidonow · 14/03/2012 21:55

Oh I dont know what you do! YANBU to feel aggrieved and argue your case but YABU to get angry about it as you won't sleep tonight without vodka!

X

ohdearwhatdoidonow · 14/03/2012 21:57

Oh and BTW JT is a knob! You can tell your OH where to find me if he wants to discuss;)

charlieandlola · 14/03/2012 22:02

YANBU.

In a battle between feminism and football, feminism is never going to win. sorry.
This is the culture that pays someone more than 10 nurses annual wage, per week, to kick a sheep's bladder around a pitch once a week.
What, really, is the point in engaging in adult discussion with men on this topic.
It is really only going to end up one way, you, upset and dissatisfied.
Don't bother, have a Wine instead and keep your blood pressure down.

But, no, empirically, YANBU at all.

Coconutty · 14/03/2012 22:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

peeriebear · 14/03/2012 22:06

I think JT always looks like he needs a bath. With scruffy schoolboy hair.

rhondajean · 14/03/2012 22:10

All of their wives (the cheating cocking footballers that is ) are complete muppets.

I present...

Colleen Rooney
Mrs giggs
Abbey Clancy
Etc
Etc
Etc

The men do it because they can and because they are told they are wonderful and they had no moral compass given to them as young men. The women put up with it because they have no worth beyond being bought stuff.

I would rather have my eyes gouged out with a rusty teaspoon.

So, YANBU, but to some extent your husband is right about those particular women, because that is all they have made themselves worth.

vodkalorange · 14/03/2012 22:11

I think I am a feminist-come-lately to the whole concept. I used to be one of those women who goes "do I define as a feminist? Oh no, I like wearing a bra" simper simper.

But JT's poor mug of a wife (and Coleen Rooney and the rest), who choose money (but is it really just the money and if so what does that mean), over 'self respect' and NO censure from the general public about what fucking JT has done just sneering at Vanessa 'the slag' and his 'mug' of a best mate who doesn't want to shake his hand and he's still wearing the captain's sleeve and getting 60k a fucking week when the NHS is being taken apart...

I am so angry!!!

Maybe I should ask my husband (who I am so lucky to have, I should be grateful he's not cheating!), to buy me some more Wine hey

OP posts:
KenDoddsDadsDog · 14/03/2012 22:12

Rhonda Jean is right.
JT is a bell end.

rhondajean · 14/03/2012 22:12

I don't think jt's wage is related to nhs reform...

Buy your own wine! Set an example! Grin

Kayano · 14/03/2012 22:14

I did notice Jonathan Ross dribbling over the female athletes.

He is awful

vodkalorange · 14/03/2012 22:16

if I buy my own wine I am SPENDING DH's MONEY selfish cow that I am.

I could be spending that money on socks for my DCs!

OP posts:
vodkalorange · 14/03/2012 22:17

if the male footballers were paid what the female footballers are, and 'we' magically put the extra into the NHS/social causes...

(I know it's not that easy since most footballers are paid by non-UK conglomerates but they don't even pay tax for the most part!)

OP posts:
rhondajean · 14/03/2012 22:34

They do pay a lot of tax, i agree they are overpaid but hey they aren't BANKERS or anything...

Does your DH say those kind of things about you? He sounds delightful! One more example of why I will never be dependent on a man for financial support!

Tell him I said he's an arse!

vodkalorange · 14/03/2012 22:36

DH is fine ON PAPER and will buy me wine whenever but that's not the point!

OP posts:
DoMeDon · 14/03/2012 22:37

YANBU - nothing you can do other than what you have done - challenge it.

CuttedUpPear · 14/03/2012 22:40

Declare yourself a feminist. It helped me.

rhondajean · 14/03/2012 22:44

Lol fine on paper, so are bikini waxes and indeed johnathon Ross Grin

troisgarcons · 14/03/2012 22:45

Im not understand ing how John Terry and his Private Life and his Racist court case or his mother being done for shop lifting has anything to so with pregnant female atheletes?

he said maybe JT's wife "couldn't do better" well she can't can she? she will put up with shit because he earns money and keeps her in a lush lifestyle. Wag = little better than a prostitute. Till She's too old to be seen out on his arm and he'll swap her for something younger and prettier. Sadly that is the lot of women who do not have any life of their own and leach off men.

troisgarcons · 14/03/2012 22:46

JT is not responsible for the NHS - the morons who pay oodles for kit/tickets/merchandise are responsible for his wages.

GrahamTribe · 14/03/2012 22:47

Whatever the rights and wrongs of it are there's not much point in falling out with your DH over a footballer who you presumably don't even know. Also, "he's still wearing the captain's sleeve and getting 60k a fucking week when the NHS is being taken apart... ", um, since when did footballers get paid by the taxpayer?

Kennyp · 14/03/2012 22:49

John terry is a disgrace on every level. And have you noticed how teeny tiny his nips are??????? It must mean something.

He lives near my uncle. If i ever saw him i would make sure i bumped into him and say "arent you that wayne mooney?" or something equally as daft.

I hate hate hate hate hate football, apart from when ds plays it with a beach ball and i am in goal.

vodkalorange · 14/03/2012 22:50

they wouldn't be paid anything if society didn't stare slack-jawed at them like they're the fucking gods of olympus.

OP posts:
GrahamTribe · 14/03/2012 22:53

There's a nice bit of generalisation. Some of us "morons" are hardworking, honest, decent people, we're not all thugs and scumbags.

troisgarcons · 14/03/2012 22:57

they wouldn't be paid anything if society didn't stare slack-jawed at them like they're the fucking gods of olympus.

So do you think all sports peopel shouldnt be paid as professionals?

How about golfers or tennis players? far more highly paid.

Not my idea of fun but lets face it we cant all be captain of industry. This is the upside or downside of capitalist society - people pay to be entertained. You can apply that to musicians or actors.Even when you do get a high performing CEO people go "boo hoo, no one is worth that".

My arguement is always - if you like equality so much, fuck off and live in Cuba

troisgarcons · 14/03/2012 23:01

the morons who pay oodles for kit/tickets/merchandise are responsible for his wages.

There's a nice bit of generalisation. Some of us "morons" are hardworking, honest, decent people, we're not all thugs and scumbags.

nope - cant see I said you werent earning a wage or not decent or not hardworking.

Bit of a mug tho' if you pay the sort of money the premiership clubs command for merchandise just because you like a pretty moniker on something.

And I live in a footballing household. >gazes at the tribal followers in distain

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