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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think that if you dont understand someone because they have a different accent to you, it's just ignorant

102 replies

lostboysfallin · 14/03/2012 06:03

And maybe a little bit stupid
I know some accents are difficult to understand, but fgs try.

OP posts:
lifechanger · 14/03/2012 06:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EssentialFattyAcid · 14/03/2012 06:15

A significant percentage of us have hearing problems so yabvu

Walkinginwonderland · 14/03/2012 06:17

Yabu.

samandi · 14/03/2012 06:22

YABU. Some accents are more difficult to understand than others.

AngryBeaver · 14/03/2012 06:23

What?! That is bollocks,tbh. I live in NZ and was talking to a girl in a pet shop,she had frozen with a smile on her face and then just said "nah,still not getting it!" I didn't think,"god,you ignorant bitch!" I just thought,oh she can't catch the accent. It happens.
Have you ever watched Rab C. Nesbitt??

TroublesomeEx · 14/03/2012 06:23

Er, YABU.

lostboysfallin · 14/03/2012 06:35

No hearing impediments

Just " I don't understand you half of the time, so I ignore you"
I honestly do find it very insulting when people don't try to understand you, or just write you off.

I did say I understand some accents are tricky, but trying to understand would be appreciated.
And I didn't say ignorant bitch, angrybeaver, I'm not calling anyone a bitch, that would make me ignorant!

OP posts:
2shoes · 14/03/2012 06:42

yabu
sometimes you just can't
why is that ignorant.

EssentialFattyAcid · 14/03/2012 06:43

I suspect this person does have a gearing impediment that they don't wish to confide

MrsKittyFane · 14/03/2012 06:44

" I don't understand you half of the time, so I ignore you" is very different to sorry, could you say that again/ repeat that

If you are talking about a specific incident say it in your OP rather than making sweeping statements.

Sparklingbrook · 14/03/2012 06:45

Well I must be ignorant, because believe it or not sometimes if someone has an accent I don't always catch what they mean. I do try though. Honest.

lostboysfallin · 14/03/2012 06:46

Ok, maybe I'll reword it
Its ignorant to not attempt to understand someone, to try, not to write them off as stupid and therefore unimportant because they don't talk the same as you

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 14/03/2012 06:47

Have you got an example lostboys? Have you been misunderstood?

EdithWeston · 14/03/2012 06:51

When I cannot understand an accent it's not ignorance (ie lack of knowledge), and many have pointed out that their barriers to understanding arise from causes other than ignorance.

(How is one ignorant of an accent btw - is this a moan about new arrivals who would indeed be ignorant of an accent, having probably never been exposed to it before?)

sommewhereelse · 14/03/2012 06:52

Are you a very fast talker from Glasgow?
I speak to people from all over the English speaking world in my job and that's the only one I have problems with.

AdventureInKL · 14/03/2012 06:55

There are accents I understand and accents I struggle with. Height of ignorance to ignore due to not understanding, but perfectly reasonable to not understand in the first place. A simple "could you repeat that please" whilst shouting and gesticulation wildly just in case will suffice.

Wink
JanePlanet · 14/03/2012 06:58

Yabu. DH is Irish and can't understand some of the stronger Irish accents. What hope have I got.

Ephiny · 14/03/2012 07:14

YABU, some accents just are difficult to understand if you're not used to them. It can be especially difficult if it's not your first language, it doesn't mean you're stupid or not trying!

JustHecate · 14/03/2012 07:15

People don't choose to not understand an accent. It can be very difficult to understand a really heavy accent where words are pronounced totally differently.

How do you work out what the words are when they don't sound like the words you know?

My husband is Kenyan. When we first met, he had a very strong accent. There were many times I had to ask him to repeat something because I hadn't understood it the first time.

And then there was the Shepherds Bush Row Grin where he argued that it was Shefferd because ph is ff. Quite a humdinger that was!

But you aren't talking about people who have genuine trouble and seek clarification - like most people do!

Your title and OP were very misleading and gave the impression that if you don't actually understand words said in a way you've never heard them said before - you're ignorant. Which is just dumb! There is no ignorance in hearing an unfamiliar sound and being unable to decode it and relate it to a familiar sound.

But you're not on about that. You're talking about prejudiced people who hear a foreign accent (foreign as in overseas or unfamiliar) and use that to be a twat. Normally a bigoted twat. And even though they can understand, they say spiteful things or sneer.

That's very different from actually not understanding what someone said to you.

squeakytoy · 14/03/2012 07:16

I seem to spend most of my day saying variations of..

"sorry, I didnt quite catch that"

"sorry, could you say that again, the phone went a bit funny"

"sorry, could you spell that for me"

as many of the phone calls I receive daily are from people whose first language is not English, or have heavy regional accents.

The worst though is when they have left a voicemail on our answerphone, rattled off their message quickly, and I have no chance of deciphering it.

catgirl1976 · 14/03/2012 07:16

YABU

Not being able to understand someone has nothing to do with ignorance and everything to do with comprehension

obvs

Whatmeworry · 14/03/2012 07:23

Yabu - some accents are near unintelligible until you get your ear in.

lostboysfallin · 14/03/2012 07:25

I'm not making a sweeping statement with no thought.
This incident happened two weeks ago and I have really tried to understand the reasoning behind it, but it just made me think about other examples. Obviously asking someone to repeat something because you haven't understood is not ignorant. But if you write that person off as being stupid because you can't understand them, I think it shows a certain ignorance.

I have a friend who is Polish, she is very smart, but she has a very thick accent.
She gets a lot of dismissive comments.

And not all call centre operators overseas are stupid, they are doing a job.

OP posts:
Ilovedaintynuts · 14/03/2012 07:25

YABU

Actually I wuld go as far as to say if you have a strong accent speak slowly and clearly to idiots like me.
My DH is Scottish and when he first introduced me to his friends I could barely understand a word they said. But did they slow down their words so I could understand? Nope.
I have been interviewing recently. It is so embarrassing speaking to people (especially on the phone) you can't understand. Nobody struggles intentionally.

PerryCombover · 14/03/2012 07:27

Sorry, wot?