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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think a bottle of wine is a LOT to drink for 1 person?

274 replies

lesley33 · 12/03/2012 19:10

This comes out of a discussion with a frind who I saw on Saturday morning. When we talked about what we were going to do that weekend it came up that she was planning to drink a bottle of wine to herself that evening. When I commented that this was a lot, she said she regularly drank a bottle of wine.

So AIBU in thinking this is a lot for someone to drink in 1 night?

OP posts:
JasperJohns · 12/03/2012 20:47

I would be shit-faced if I drank a bottle of wine.

If dh and I share one between us, I usually will get a hangover.

I love wine (although have given up booze for lent), but I must be a light weight.

WestYorkshirePudding · 12/03/2012 20:47

I have a bottle of wine on Friday and Saturday nights (a bottle each night) and can be in the gym at 9am the next morning. TBH most of my friends can too but this is our weekend, 7 o'clock comes and we sit down as a family - me with wine, OH with beer and the kids with lemonade, crisps and dips. Bliss! :)

madaboutmadmen · 12/03/2012 20:47

Used to do it a good ten years ago, would never manage it now without a stinking hangover. I think I've learnt my limit though.

If its every night, I think it may be a problem but once a twice a week, maybe not? Would you see it differently if she 3 glasses of wine whilst going for a pub mesl on a Saturday night?

Bunbaker · 12/03/2012 20:47

spuddybean We don't get invited to dos that last all day. When my cousin got married two years ago. I started off with Pimms and then went on to white wine and then lemonade and finally some tea. I started again in the evening and had perhaps a couple of glasses of wine. I just don't have the stamina to get drunk and stay drunk for any length of time. Besides, I wouldn't get drunk in front of DD.

Birdsgottafly · 12/03/2012 20:47

I drink anything and everything.

I think that we all have drinks that regardless of alcohol content, we don't get drunk on it and that is the danger, especially if you enjoy what you drink.

I can drink a bottle of baileys or nearly a bottle of Southern Comfort and be fine, i get drunk on shandy, though. I would drink Southern Comfort or Snaps, even if it didn't have alcohol in.

I have regular liver testing because i have Lupus, my Liver count is more effected depending on what i drink, not how much, so i think a few factors are at play.

I know lots of people who could drink bottles of wine and be fine, but they don't do it often.

Original poster
lesley33 · 12/03/2012 20:48

redwine - No, generally people who are overweight know they are overweight and that it isn't great for their health. Ditto smoking. But I was concerned because my friend genuinely didn't think there was anything wrong with drinking this amount and I thought there was. So I was checking out what others thought.

OP posts:
molly3478 · 12/03/2012 20:49

spuddybean - last time I did it at a wedding I got so pissed I did a runner in to the gardens tried to shag dh in a bush by lying on the floor and pulling my pants off, couldnt even see, me and my bros missus did a runner and went clubbing and then dh and my bro hated us. Luckily none of the wedding party saw this and there were so many other piss head things going on that my behaviour (thankfully went unnoticed)

That was a few years back and never again! I had 3 glasses of wine that day since that day I will never even drink one glass of wine at a formal event in any circumstances not even for the toast. Can drink anything else though and do but wine is lethal to me.

TheMerchantOfVenom · 12/03/2012 20:50

See, we don't drink during the week. Maybe the odd G&T after settling the kids, but it's just the one and only every now and then.

The wine is just Fridays and Saturdays.

I dunno - try as I might, I just can't work up a decent sort of panic about it.

QuickLookBusy · 12/03/2012 20:50

I'm not judging anyone, and I don't think Lesley is out of order to worry about her friend.

It is all very well for people to say "It doesn't effect me/All my friends do it/There is nothing wrong with it"

But you are deluding yourself.

It's like an obese person saying "it doesn't matter if I eat 4 donuts a day/I like the taste of food so why not/It's my only pleasure"

All excuses, but it doesn't mean you are right or healthy.

Meglet · 12/03/2012 20:51

IMO one bottle is fine in a once in a blue moon, let your hair down type of evening. Not that I get to do it any more Envy.

On a regular basis it's a recipe for problems.

I can't even drink a whole glass without feeling wasted these days.

TheMerchantOfVenom · 12/03/2012 20:53

I'm not saying it's right, nor healthy. :)

Likewise, it's my vice offset against an otherwise healthy lifestyle and - most importantly - I'm an adult, it's my choice, and I'm happy with it.

AThingInYourLife · 12/03/2012 20:53

Sure, redwine, in your case.

But the OP is about a woman whose plan for the night was to drink a bottle of wine.

I wouldn't worry about a friend who told me that was her plan, but I would be concerned if I was planning nights like that for myself.

I think a lof of people in our society (and I very much include myself in this) have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol.

I love drinking, I love afternoon drinking, I love getting a little bit drunk, I love sharing drinks with friends and often end up having more than I intended.

I don't judge people for what they drink (unless they drive).

But I do try to keep an eye on myself, because I think it's easy (especially with drinking at home) to get into bad habits.

DH'd dad died suddenly of liver failure. Nobody even knew he had an alcohol problem until he went into a coma.

It can sneak up on you.

Lilyloo · 12/03/2012 20:53

Would having a glass of wine each evening be any different than a bottle at the weekend ?
I know lots of people who may have a glass of something when cooking , eating dinner.
I don't drink in the week , including Sunday but see Fri Sat as my night off. This usually means a bottle of wine. I dont see a problem as i eat well and do lots of exercise , dont smoke etc

BrianCoxHasScaryHair · 12/03/2012 20:53

Single mum, 5'11".

Loves me wine.

Ex smoker 10 years de-puffed.

I've got over my worst vice, so if my only vice now is a bottle of wine on a Saturday night, that's ok by me.

Some on this post have come across as holier than though. OP - you were asking out of concern for a friend, I don't include you in that comment.

I think anybody getting a little bit defensive has responded to the holier-than-thou vibe from others.

I'd love to know what all your vices are - I bet there are some that would have me hoiking my bosom and clutching my pearls in disgust Wink

Oh and who was it stealth boasting about their perfect Saturday night which included sex AND wine. Show off Wink

HurricaneBawbag · 12/03/2012 20:54

I prefer to save my units for a binge every few weeks... I know this is not the best way to drink Grin but I worry about people who drink regularly during the week and folk at work who can't wait to get home for a glass of wine. I've had alcohol four times this year, I don't get hangovers and could probably drink two bottles of wine in a night. I would feel it the next morning though!

DilysPrice · 12/03/2012 20:55

I think that if you're drinking 10 units gradually between 6pm and 11pm then you'd "process" about half of them as you go along, on the 1 unit per hour rule of thumb - which is why so many women can manage it without getting shitfaced.. Unfortunately it still carries health risks if you do it too often - which is the individual's choice to make but should be done with eyes open.

SparkyMcSparrow · 12/03/2012 20:56

Ooo who was boasting about sex and wine?

I have fecking amazing sex when I have had a drink Grin

Dh would like me to drink more often Wink

PrettyPollytheParrot · 12/03/2012 20:56

Let's just say that if I drank a bottle of wine to myself I would be seeing it again later that evening.

Original poster
lesley33 · 12/03/2012 21:00

Briancox - You see I know I do quite a few unhealthy things. But I know they are unhealthy and I am choosing to do them. I agree most people do ahve vices. But I do think there is a difference between knowing something is unhealthy and doing it and not knowing.

OP posts:
BrianCoxHasScaryHair · 12/03/2012 21:03

I agree, but as somebody else said - being an adult is about making those choices, I know a bottle of wine isn't a healthy thing, I know drinking Diet Coke like it's going out of fashion isn't healthy.

I am able to make a choice though, maybe your friend has made that choice too just as you have made your choices about your vices?

Spuddybean · 12/03/2012 21:03

oh dear molly after just 3 glasses!!

I went to a wedding last June and i didn't want to get drunk so i had, 3 glasses of champagne. 4 glasses of wine, 5 pints of lager and then another large glass of white.

I was not drunk and walked to my hotel quite fine. I was just nicely tipsy and the most embarrassing thing i did was dance a bit badly. I would still drink like that in front of my children. DP on the other hand is pissed after 4 pints!!

ButWhyIsTheGinGone · 12/03/2012 21:03

But lesley - that is so patronising!

Should she have prefaced her intention to drink a bottle of wine with "I ofcourse know the health risks involved," or "I know it's bad, but..."

Or are you assuming she's so unintelligent and unobservant she cannot have noticed that ALCOHOL IS BAD?! Are you assuming that if she doesn't get a fat tummy or a phlegmy cough she can't possibly aware of any health issues?

Maybe she's just doing what makes her happy...

TheMerchantOfVenom · 12/03/2012 21:05

Come on Lesley - yes you're being really rather patronising!!

I bet some of the naysayers on this thread get much less exercise than I do. And/or are more overweight.

Nobody's perfect, health-wise. Well, nobody on this thread very few of us!!

Original poster
lesley33 · 12/03/2012 21:06

It was because she didn't seem to think it was a lot.

OP posts:
BoysBoysBoysAndMe · 12/03/2012 21:06

Before I was pg, I drank a bottle of wine every sat night at home. All to myself. It's the only time I drink as I seem to hardly go out these days.

I don't have any other vices other than the Chinese or Indian take away we have when I drink my wine and my dh has 2 bottles of tequila beer.

I look forward to it, as it's part of our weekly routine and part of the precious time we get together alone. Most of the time I drink it all, but not because I down it. I start drinking after the kids are in bed at 7 and then hit the hay about 11 usually. I loved my sat nights! Movie, take out, wine.

My mum is an alcoholic so I'm very aware about how much I do or don't drink. But I think a bottle once a week is fine- FOR ME. But you say potatoe I say potato. Cest la vie!

If it was more than once or twice a week or if friend couldn't look after the kids after a drink, or if she was a pita or a danger, like drink driving, then I would be concerned.

But if the concern was aimed at me I'd say yabu.