Taking off shoes

[Dolcelatte]

AIBU to wonder what the etiquette is for removing shoes when you go to someone's house? Obviously you would remove dirty boots or trainers but what about kitten heels or more everyday footwear? I know that in certain cultures it is customary to remove footwear but would you do it as a general rule? I have noticed that some people do and some people don't (I don't actually mind at my house - I already have children and dogs to ensure that the floor receives plenty of cleaning!). Just wondering....

Very definitely a lower class thing to take shoes off ,sorry about that but true.

I'm certainty not lower class at all. That's also wrong.

"Very definitely a lower class thing to take shoes off ,sorry about that but true."

Not in South Yorkshire. It is accepted practice among everyone I know and I mix with people from all backgrounds.

Well...no-one actually thinks they're lower class, do they?

I am common as muck

Wow there is some snobbery on here!

Maybe it's a townie thing? Wanting to avoid the "wild" countryside and all the mud that entails? Anyone who has lived in the country would of course remove muddy wellies but otherwise I've never met a non-townie who insisted "shoes off". Funnily enough while the country is muddy, I find towns much dirtier (the air isn't as fresh, there's a general griminess).

Well I find snobs class people as lower class

Just saying.

Sorry to disabuse you of that notion FilterCoffee, but I live in a rural area.

Tbh. Some people do and some people don't! I don't actually think it matters where you live or how much money you earn.

The amount of people I know who don't have doormats because it spoils the 'look'!

I hate having to remember to put decent socks and slip-on shoes on when I'm visiting. I tend to let these friendships slip.

Whoever invented cream carpets needs shooting.

I always take my shoes off in other peoples houses. I would never wear them at home either.

But, I did visit a grubby house last year and there was no way I was taking my shoes off .

Ooh, I would have been too embarrassed to ask guests to take off their shoes, although would always accept if they offered; until last week, that is, after my lovely neighbour came over and had a gob of dogshit sort of wedged under his heal, which ended up just everywhere. Uh, am still queasy at the thought of it. I'm going to be quite strict about it from now on.

Have to say, most people I know with small kids just automatically take theirs off at the door without me asking, and I always do likewise at their houses. None of us are "lower middle class", either!

BTW, we're in a rural area, too. My parents and PILs live in rural areas and I grew up in a rural area. Shoes off at the door and always has been.

These threads always make me feel a bit weird, like I'm completely missing out on this whole other culture. I have NEVER been to a house and asked to take off my shoes, I would never ask a guest to take off their shoes in my house either. I have oak floors; they get a bit grubby, they get cleaned. Where are all these shoeless people? Or am I some horrible oblivious person and when I leave people are muttering about my shoes?

I'd never ask anybody to take there shoes off. Everyone I know bar my best friend do.

I'd never ask simone to take their shoes off. I feel it's rude to do so.

I don't know who Simone is but I still wouldnt ask her!

It's not rude as its your house! I'd you went to there house and told them to take there shoes off. That's rude.

If not I'd

Nah, I would feel rude asking and insulted to be asked. It's like saying your floors are more important than your guests comfort.

"Is this a 'shoes-off' house?" (in fact it should be patently obvious by the presence or absence of a pile of shoes by the front door)

"Sorry to disabuse you of that notion FilterCoffee, but I live in a rural area."

There will always be exceptions to any rule. I'd be interested to know overall statistics though :)

Lesley33 - actually everyone laughed and joked to my mums face (one of her friends actually brought those blue plastic shoe covers with him) - but we didn't care, just laughed along with them and STILL insisted they took off the offending footware!

Just out of interest to everyone who has said it is common to ask for shoes to be taken off - why is this so? I'm not offended but just interested as to what makes it common?

Also I don't really understand why people would be worried about the state of their feet because usually if you are barefoot you would be wearing sandles/flip flops which would show off/up the state of your feet anyway

Eppa I think (and I'm sort of being devil's advocate - not saying this is what I believe) that some people would say being preocccupied with material things is a bit vulgar, and that what really matters is not objects or being seen to be smart or having the 'right' decor but your guests and their comfort. Does that make sense?

So to take the example of the family I knew growing up buying a piano then keeping it wrapped in plastic - they didn't have a piano because they loved music, but because it was an object that everyone would see through the living room window and say, "Oh look, number 32 has a piano."

Er, not sure if I have explained myself properly. As I say I'm not necessarily saying that's what I think, but that might all be part of the little indicators that make people subconsciously assign 'class' to people (even though as we all know class is a loada bollix)