WIBU to have entered in to a Loud Parenting stand-off at the library?

[welliesandpyjamas]

I think I know I WBU. In fact, I have brought shame on MN by stooping to these levels rather than just smirking and ignoring. I apologise.

I arrived early with DS2 to library rhymetime and was sitting reading quietly in the corner. Other mum comes in and announces to the whole place to her toddler that they will now sit and read. Cue LOUD reading of and over the top expressions and actions to the disinterested child. Very LOUD and ARTICULATED. And for some reason, I decided to out-loud-parent her and do the same, but going up one, by reading the bilingual books

In my defence, I did very quickly get a grip and stop.

She didn't, though. Went on for another 15 minutes and then was the loudest singer with the biggest actions during Rhymetime. Her dc did I mention his name was Zebediah? was more interested in making piles of books and picking his nose.

Bitch Mum certainly deserved her name, Katie. Some people are just leftover school bullies, aren't they. Odd.

I know I was BU . And actually totally out of character. honest . But it just sort of happened, as my 8 yr old would say

typo - sitting in ma mat

Snort @ Sitting On Ma !

DS smacks me in the face and shushes me if I sing in public. He is quite right.

I really cannot do it. Plus it's all 7 month olds having their arms worked like ventriloquists dummies and mums singing nursery rhymes round here. DS would tear the place up!

I've just remembered my own dear SIL and her dh are masters of the loud parenting. She even does it to other people's children and their parents! I remember her telling some poor woman she'd never met before how clever she was to be having another baby. For about 20 minutes. Now it's been a while but I don't think intellect has much to do with conception... It was excruciating.

Makes my Makaton and running commentary look positively uptight and repressed!

mummy nickel has been seen singing choral music to baby nickel when walking down the road.
baby nickel always asleep in the pram when this happens

(in my defence, I'm usually practising the anthem for this sunday's service, not singing posh clever music to DD on purpose )

I do lots of what must look like Loud Parenting

In shops
"Question. how much is that, X?"
"Question. If you give the lady £10, how much change will you have?"
"Question. This is 70p and this is £1.20, how much is it altogether?"

etc etc

In my defence, they are both autistic and I am actually trying to teach them basic independent living skills. But to the casual observer I must look like a twat of the highest order. I am always looking round too, because I feel I am making a show of it and am being Judged

(I have to start with "question" if it's my youngest I am talking to because it's how he knows I am asking him something and that a response is required, but that must just be the icing on the cake for the observer )

JustHecate.

I feel bad now for making assumptions. Will listen out for parents saying "Question:" and not judge as I most definitely would before

if the person saying "question" is a short fat woman with red hair and she's saying it to a boy about her height who is doing what appears to be a tommy cooper impression while yelling HELP ME I'M NAKED BUM CHIKKA WOW WOW I LIKE TRAINS - offer to buy me a coffee, I need one

JustHecate
I wouldn't think you were a performance parent because you were asking your children usual life skills questions.

I you were asking them to convert the amounts into another currency because "we had such a marvellous holiday there last year didn't we darlings..." then I might go

heehee. I might just do that for funsies now, if I spy someone who looks like they might be a mumsnetter

JustHecate

What a wonderful image you conjure ...

It's not a dull life, certainly.

God, you lot are lucky to have Performance Parents! Round here it's 'Get in the buggy/here's your Quavers" which doesn't leave a lot of scope for spotting intensive Mandarin Chinese coaching. Performance Parenting takes on a different form here. Parent in playground speaking very loudly of her 9 yr old pfb: "Danny's just brilliant at sport - might have a boxing champ on our hands." Sotto voice nearby: "Cage or bareknuckle?"

oh, seriously, you lot have killed me!

i was reading a lift the flap book to dd earlier (it'a a noisy peekaboo book where when you get the right answer it makes a noise).
there was a customer in the shop and i was really embarrassed doing it.

Wondering if I'm a performance parent then? I naturally have a loudish voice and i do encourage dd at the park like saying good walking etc not to outdo other patents just to help dd develop?

Loving this thread - keep the anecdotes coming!
I do speak to my dds in a foreign language (because it's my mother tongue) in public but quietly and it's usually a two way conversation. I've had interested looks and smiles from people in shops
What I don't get is the kind of loud running commentary on nothing in particular with totally pointless questions at their dc without pausing for the poor mite to answer

I played PP today. Toddler picked a random book off the shelf. "oh that's too easy for you Tarquin, let's take you to the Young Adult or Bilingual section". :)

Good work, Panzee

Angel, I don't think you're a performance parent . You need to work more on your pretentious elaborations and the sweeping glances around the room to make sure everyone's attention is on you

As my DCs are all now grown up and l can no longer show off their bi-linguism and immaculate manners l am now reduced to being a performance responsible dog owner - as in:

'No Bixxie dont do anymore l have no more doggy poop bags left after picking up two lots already'

No - your right, it doesnt come close, but its all l have now [pathetic]

Thanks wellies will have yo keep an eye out in the supermarket from pp parents for tips lol.

pan zee that made me laugh out loud!

Omigod I didn't know this performance parenting thing existed! Hilarious!

You were dead right to take the piss - what an eejit that woman sounds.

Hilarious thread. DP's brother and his wife try to do performance parenting... At DP's sister's birthday party a while back, they spoke loudly, to anyone who would listen, about how their DD had very exotic tastes and would eat anything. Ahem. They then went on to say that she loves Aromat (and that they often dip their fingers in it and let her lick it off), chocolate, and salt & vinegar Pringles. Their DD was 6 months old at the time. All night, they broke chocolate bars and crisps into little pieces and shoved them in their DD's mouth. And seemed to think that this was wonderful and a demonstration of their superior parenting skills, and that we all ought to be utterly impressed by it.

you are ace

I had "Oh look Tabby, look at that naughty baby with a bottle" to her 5yo! It seems one is never too young to compete in the bf/ff debate.

theodorakis Noooooooooo!

There are some utter arses out there, aren't there?
I remember after I had my first, I had a sort of hazy romantic notion that being a parent made you nice, made you care about other people, especially other peoples' children ......