and will DS really hate me in the future?

[wineoclocktimeyet]

DS (aged 7) is football mad. He goes to training once a week after school plays for a local U8 team on a sunday.

I've always thought he's good, and silently that he's their best player! but always put it down to proud mummyness.

Since the start of this season though, we have been approached by 3 scouts from local professional teams (we live in London), who have said that he is good and asked if he can go to a trial at one of their academys.

DH and I have been in agreement that we dont want that - DS is also a keen cricket player and swimmer and like all 7 year olds gets very tired.

Things moved along a bit after a cup game last weekend when the senior scout from a local premiership team approached us after the match and said they wanted to sign DS on an exclusive contract until he is 14. . He is 7 years old FFS.

The money would be lovely! BUT he would have to train with them 3-4 times a week all year around (ie also in the cricket season) and basically this means he would have to stop all his other activities inc Beavers etc.

We have said no. I know its potentially a great opportunity for him BUT he is only 7 and I feel if he really is that good, then he will still be that good at 14, 15, 16. I dont want to limit any of his options at such a young age.

BUT - a couple of the other parents overheard this scout and the news seems to have spread and I must admit I'm really suprised that everyone seems to think we are doing the wrong thing. As far as I know, DS and the other boys dont seem to know, but I'm not sure how long that will last.

Sorry, this has turned into an epic post, but my question are we being unreasonable to say no?

and has anyone else been in this position?

I'd allow it. It's not up to use to decide which of our children's talents to focus on... ask him, if he wants to do it let him! Surely at that age there is a get out clause if it doesnt suit the child?

My DS would give his right arm for an opportunity like this and I would love him to have the opportunity, but i do think you are right to give it a lot of thought.
If I were in your shoes and I thought the hours,travelling and impact on the rest of the family were manageable I would agree to a 6 month contract or a contract with 6 month break clauses. Anyone wanting more of a commitment from a 7 year old is simply expecting too much and that would ring warning bells for me.
Do let us know what happens next

BOM - that's the point though. If focussing at such a young age, on one thing is to the detriment of all the other skills he has to develop and experiences he's got to have then you are choosing which he's going to focus on.

I'd play the various scouts off against each other to get the best deal for your son. However I would get him playing at their academies to see how he really stacks up.

I wouldn't worry about the other activities - he'll play cricket at school and can always fit swimming etc in.

I'd say go for it but with reservations about taking a long term contract out.
Of course the way contracts work in football is only to guarantee that the player can be sold on for a decent price because they "own" you - they don't really mean you'll stay with them for that long.

I'd be very dubious of this "7 year contract", it's bonkers. If offered they will register your son one year at a time. Not a straight 7 year commitment.

Was it the Head of Youth Football at the club or Head Scout, as the latter can't make such offers. Be wary, as many previous posters have pointed out. Also I am aware of a scout in London who promises the world.

Personally I feel you have absolutely made the right decision, your son is too young to have this conversation with. If he loves football he will of course say yes. It is too ruthless a world for a boy aged 8,9,10+ to experience that rejection of "unfortunately we're are not in a position to extend your stay...." and be able to cope with it.

Check out this link.......

www.footballacademytalk.com/football-academy-faq/

My 13 yr old is very sporty - not football another sport. He would never have forgiven me if a pro team had come in for me and I'd refused.

Don't do it.

7 is too early, as someone else said thay are not interested in his welfare and he might end up better at cricket or wanting to do another sport such as athletics.

Tell them to come back when he is 14.

Are all 3 scouts offering the same? Speak to other people to get a better idea of what involved, do a bit more research before you say no. Kids don't get picked at this age for no good reason .... If you say no now then you will never get this opportunity again. 14/15 will be too late.

Steven Gerrard signed at about 7 years old a d was then involved in an accident at around 10 years old. He got to hospital and the doctors wanted to take his toe off. Because he was already signed liverpools club doctor came immediately the foot was saved and obviously the rest is history. Of. Outer the club want a return on their investment but equally they can make sure your son makes the most of his talents too. How gutted would you be if he has David Beckham potential and breaks his legs at beavers and can never play again. If he's that good the club will rightly protect him.

I wouldn't want to limit a child of mine to just football at age 7.

If he could do it alongside other activities then yes, but this is not what's being proposed by the scout. Is there any chance of negotiating a different deal with the scout? If they are really keen on him they may agree to a different set up.

thing is with football - it's there all the time, it costs nothing to practise the skills, you don't need special equipment, there will always be teams to play for etc etc. I therefore think there is less need for loads of training at such a young age. The few boys I know who have signed for premier academies have now been dropped - he may well be the best footballer in the team but it's a big world out there & if he is really good he will get asked again when he is older.

wine you sound incredibly grounded. You are right, he is 7 years old. Keep doing what you are doing with him, letting him try all sports, mixing with a range of different children and personalities.

Wait until he is at least 10 and then consider it if he is still interested in football.

Too much hard training at such a young age can lead to horrific injuries.

My DD's SIL is a talented cricketer and from a young age she has missed out on birthday parties, family gatherings, weddings etc. because she was "at cricket training" Nothing is going to bring those social gatherings back.

Here's a perspective you might not have had - what position will he be in as anadult ifhe goes for it and it doesn't work out? I don't think you will automatically be limiting his future options. As a PhD student, I used to play in a very good mixed 5-a-side team. And by very good, I mean that among my fellow PhD students, there was a guy who'd been to school at a specialist football academy in Mexico City, and a guy who'd played for Lazio's youth squad (so equivalent to being signed by one of the London premiership clubs). Both of them had decided professional football wasn't for them, and it hadn't messed up the rest of their education (clearly - physics PhDs are not an intellectual soft-option), and it hadn't stopped them having a rounded range of interests. So I agree with the posters who've said talk to your son about it and ask what he wants (there are mumsnetters on here living with having 7 year-olds away Monday to Friday because the child, at their own request, is attending choir school).

I haven't read all the responses and had to check your name a few times op, that you weren't in fact me.

A MNer friend linked this thread for me by PM as she knows I would be interested, as I am going through exectly, and I mean, exactly the same thing. Except DS is 8, plays in U8 atm.

We decided to allow him to play a couple of matches with the Academy sides, so we could get a closer look, and he could see what he thought of it. My DS is also very bright academically, and a star cricketer, and has lots of other activities that I think will help him become a rounded individual, rather than a football obsessive.

We are NOT signing him up, he is staying with his local club, as star player. He loved playing the other matches with the other boys, but when asked afterwards who he liked playing for best, he quoted all 3 teams. I guess he gets different things from them all - he likes playing with better players and learnign from them, but he also likes being star player and playing with his friends. They get so much from football - self esteem, teamwork, sportmanship, it is about far more than the (very unlikely) potential to be a stellar career.

I have found people I mention it to are when I tell them we aren't persuing it - either because they are living vicariously or see stars and money and are dazzled. It rarely works out that way, from what I've read. I recommend reading this article........

The way I see it, in a few years time, if they are still sniffing around and he's still as interested, we'll look at it again. Stay strong, and go with what you think is roght for YOUR son.

If you ask most 7 year olds if they would like to eat chocolate and jaffa cakes for three meals a day, they are likely to say yes. That's why the adukts, the parents have to make the important decisions on behalf of children.

It is total madness to allow a 7 yo go "decide" whether to go for somethng like this.

You are the parent, it is your call. Your son may be talented. But there are many, many talented young sporty types. He will suddenly be ina very, very competitive environment. At 7.

It might turn out brilliantly. He might be a very talented player. He might reach the top of the sport.

But, he might also peak early and not have his contract picked up when he turns 16. Then what? A lifetime of disappointment?

Totally agree, Greythorne. My mother let me decide which secondary school I went to, and I thence endured the most miserable 3 years of my life, and I was 11 ( obviously....)

Madness. We are the adults here, in a position of responsibility and we should take it.

.....I really didn't like what I saw in terms of competitiveness at the Academy. There was clearly and A and a B team, and the focus on the A team was very noticeable, with perks handed out openly to them only.

I don't want my DS exposed to that yet. I know he will be eventually, but I don't want that for him yet.

Sorry, Taffeta's link to the Telegraph article said exactly what I meant. Better.

Besides, if you do let him do the academy, the best you can hope for is that he becomes a first division player, not premiership, can make a decent living, but not the Premiership mega bucks. Who in their right minds would want their son in the Premiership football lifestyle of pots of cash, fast cars, prostitiutes, racism, sexism, harvesting of pretty girls on beauty counters......

This is the bit that hit me:

"In all, there are some 9,000 boys attending these intensely competitive places. More than 90 per cent of those who join a Premier­ship academy will fail to make it into the first team. Most won?t even become professional footballers.

'You?re talking about a lot of kids chasing very, very few options,? points out Jim White, journalist, broadcaster and the author of You?ll Win Nothing with Kids: Fathers, Sons and Football. 'One of the problems with the academy system is that its ethos, basically, is to throw enough against the wall and hope that some of it sticks."

the infamous harvesting article, and don't worry, it's the Guardian, not the DM

Hi, I'm coming to this stream very late in the day, and haven't read all the posts. However, I can offer some views on this. DS is 9 and was scouted for the youth academy of a professional London team at an interschools match. We took him along to a training session and they invited him to do a 6 week trial. After the trial ended they were supposed to either offer him a contract or say goodbye, but instead he continues to train with them though is not signed-up. (He is a goalkeeper, and they did not have an opening for a GK in his age group, but didn't want to lose him.) In a sense we have the best of both worlds at the moment. He has top class training with them, but as yet no commitment. I think you need to be very clear what you are being offered here. Normally the youth club contracts are 2 years - I've never heard of a 7 year contract. Also, they never really offer contracts without a formal trial.
However, coming to your main concern - I agree that getting signed up at 7 is very, very young. My son is about to turn 10 and so is involved in the discussions we're having on this. Of course he is dying to be a professional footballer at this stage, but is also concerned that he won't have time for everything. Training and matches already take up most of his free time. He misses birthday parties at the weekend, and our whole family is affected by the logistics of getting him to and from various training and match grounds. I worry the whole thing has an impact on his sister too as so much revolves around his timetable. However, this period is very useful for us in assessing if this is what he really wants/we want for him, without having the commitment of a contract just yet.
I would say that if your son is very good, he will continue to be scouted and you don't need to rush. Age 10ish is a better time to be considering this. However, if you are serious about football as a career, don't leave it beyond 12 I'd say, as it is incredibly competitive, and the training these guys get from a young age is incredible.
Good luck with it all.

Let your son decide.

I know this is a very old thread and the op has probably already decided what to do but I just wanted to add my bit in case any other parents are in this situation.
Firstly, no academy or club will offer any type of contract just on the basis of watching a few games. The job of a scout is to identify talent and arrange for the dc to attend one or more trial sessions. Then if they are interested there will be a trial period, usually 6-8 weeks before any contract is signed.
Secondly 7 year olds do not get "paid" for being scouted. Never. So saying the money would come in handy is baffling. They do not become pro footballers. They just train and play with a premiership youth team. There is absolutely no money involved.
I have 2 DS 13&8. They both play for different premier league academies in London. 7-8 is the commonest age to scout, because clubs are looking for potential, DCs that they can teach. It is much harder, though not impossible to be scouted as a teenager.

Also the effort required is immense. 3 a week training, matches at least once a week etc. it requires a lot of effort from the parents. DCs are not allowed to play for any other team, including any school teams either.