to expect a 12 year old to be capable of making me a cup of tea?!

[minikimmi]

So, my 12 yr old neice was here to visit her newborn cousin. Her dad came with her but had to pop out for an hour so I was left with niece, my newborn, and my 3 other DCs all under 6. Lots of offers from niece to feed baby, change baby etc but when I asked her if she could pop the kettle on and make me a cuppa she said she 'wasn't allowed to touch the kettle'. What the actual f**k? I'm biting my tongue here trying not to ask why on Earth not?? I haven't heard any tales of her scalding herself in the past or anything. AIBU? Am I going to have to wait at least another 7 or 8 years before any of mine can make me a bloody cuppa? Please restore my faith in the youth of today!

At 12 both DDs could make a full roast dinner from scratch, including pudding.

4madboys - this is MN, 2 months is definitely not too young for such things By 2 months he should be making at least one course of a meal almost unsupervised - just prop him up in a Bumbo or whatever they are called

My 6 year old has cooked a stew and a meat pie with me closely hovering around him but I would't let him near the kettle just yet.
My DM let's him prepare drinks using her tassimo machine though. Makes him feel very grown up.
I'd fully expect him to be able to make me tea well before he is 12.

DS (12yo) can cook a bit and does Domestic Science at school but it has honestly never occurred to me to ask him to make coffee for me.

And TBH the little toad has never offered

My son a slave??!!!!
Even he would find that hilarious
One cup of tea a month if I'm lucky!

since when is getting children involved in the housework and cooking etc or making cups of tea similar to slavery?

Ok, this thread has made me realise that I have been really slack with my own ds1 (nearly 11). He is very keen to be involved in the kitchen and I haven't really done anything about it. He is an able, careful and responsible child (unlike ds2 who will never be allowed unsupervised in a kitchen until he is 40!).

So how do I start teaching him and what to teach? We cook everything from scratch in our house. I spend a lot of time in the kitchen and he sees this and really appreciates food. I want to teach him safety but also have him making meals as he would feel a real sense of achievement. I feel really silly saying it, but I just Have no idea where to start!

Only on MN can a 12yo making a cup of tea be deemed a slave .... this will be closely followed by a load of 'yer man is a useless feckwit and ill trained by his mother' on another thread.

DD2 (8) is designated drinks maker

DD1 (10) does sunday tea, usually pasta or soup (made from scratch -she likes blending it up)

I fully expect by the time they are in high school and will be getting in before me that they will take a bigger hand in family meals

I am going to make 2 young men very happy one day

I expect my DCs to contribute to the running of the house in fact I always tell them that no one lives in this house for free!!

At least they will be responsible and know the basics when they go off to uni.

wiifitmama i think once of the first meals ds1 did was jacket potatoes, nice and easy, just poke with a fork, put on a bit of olive oil and stick in the oven and then prepare toppings like tuna, cheese etc.

making sandwiches, pizzas etc also very easy and good places to start and then stuff like spag bog, chilli, shepards pie, ds1 can do all these nad loves to cook. oh puddings they always like making puddings, ds1 makes a mean cheesecake

my children, well the elder 3, hoover, change bedsheets, tidy their rooms, help with laundry, putting it in the maching, hanging/folding it, sweeping the floor, clearing and wiping the table etc they dont do it all and they dont do it everyday but they do do all these things regularly. i dont think its slavery i think its REAL life they see how a household has to be run and as they are part of the household they help out! quite simple :)

and a kettle can be dangerous but if its not over filled and they are careful and sensible (which a 12yr old should be) they are more than capable of making a cup of tea!

Mine have been making cups of tea since around age 7, ironing their school clothes from the same age, baking cakes and cooking full meals from around the same age (maybe a little older).

My mother used to give me coffee in my sippy cup when I was a baby... Both of mine like the occasional cup of tea (they are now 13 and 11) but not coffee.

I don't see it as slave labour, but learning life skills. We mollycoddle our children too much these days.

My eldest nephew has been making me and his mum cups of tea for as long as I can remember (he's 14 now). A depressed sister and 2 aunties who were always there drinking tea kind of meant he learnt a little earlier than he should of done. I've only been making tea since I moved out at 18 (23 now), mum and dad always had proper tea which is far too fussy to make :)

Thanks 4madboys (I have thee boys by the way!)

Jacket potatoes would be a great starting point for a meal for us as we do it nice a week. I part nuke them first then finish in the oven so it would involve learning how to use the microwave, safety with a hot oven, and the hob as they have baked beans on them. Oh, plus how not to grate your fingers on the cheese!

I find it quite interesting that many young children are allowed to heat stuff in a microwave, but not use a kettle. A burn from hot food would do far more damage than a splash of boiling water.

how old should children be before drinking tea then? i have drank tea since being a baby. Is there some kind of age recommendation now?

I get not allowing coffee for the very young but is tea bad too?

Wiifitmama - I've been teaching DS age 6 to cook using Jamie's Ministry of Food. It's written in really simple language so he can read the recipes himself.

He even went out to pick the herbs we needed from the garden.

I let him chop celery and peel carrots etc but not onions as they are slippery and it's easy to cut yourself.

It was all his idea - he was begging me to teach him and he made it clear that he wanted to cook a proper dinner. He was bored with making fairy cakes!

Mini why would you be handing your 12yo niece a 3 day old baby and expecting her to change it's nappies

spuddybean - i don't think there is an age recommendation is there?
aforementioned nephew has been drinking it since he was tiny, come to think of it, even though he makes tea, it's rubbish so I might as well do it myself. Makes a good cheesecake and meat and potato pie though!

I take DS to Sainsburys precisly so that he doesn't get drop-kicked back by my new DIL for being un-housetrained

Tea is not recommended for children under the age of 5 years. Think it is linked to how if affects the body regarding iron absorbtion. I wouldn't want a little one having the caffine either, if you have caffinated tea.