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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to NOT want a cleaner?

529 replies

OrkaLiely · 01/03/2012 19:30

it seems to be very common on MN; paying another person to clean your house. Why can't the adults in the house do it between them? And once the kids are old enough to hold a duste,r teach them to help out as well.

I'd hate someone else in our house cleaning up our mess. It sends a bad message to children too. And no-one in this age of dishwashers, washing machines, vacuum cleaners is too busy to do it themselves.

OP posts:
FantasticDay · 02/03/2012 11:28

I am rubbish at cleaning. I am (IMHO) good at social research. There are only so many hours in the day. If I spend an hour cleaning (badly), that is an hour I can't spend doing my job. So I would rather do my job - which I am often finishing off in the evening etc - and use the money earned to pay someone to do my cleaning (well). Kids still have to be taught to pick up after themselves and put things in the dishwasher, put their clothes in the laundry basket - as the place has to be reasonably tidy, so that the cleaner can do her job.

Quenelle · 02/03/2012 11:33

YABU

It's a good earner for lots of people. Why not spread the wealth if you can afford it?

Ephiny · 02/03/2012 11:42

"Why can't the adults in the house do it between them? "

We can. But we don't want to. That's pretty much it really, nothing complicated. I bet there are plenty things you technically could do yourself but prefer the convenience of paying someone else to do.

I don't see why it's sending a bad message to kids, any more than buying a loaf of bread from the supermarket instead of making your own (with flour from wheat you grew and harvested and ground yourself) Hmm.

DialsMavis · 02/03/2012 11:44

We are plebs who can't afford a cleaner, it does stop us enjoying our time with the DC. DP is off on Sundays all day and Saturdays until mid afternoon, we spend Sat am cleaning the house. It would be bliss to not have to, but we do so there you go. I cannot wait until we can afford a couple of hours a week help. We will pAu for 1.5 hours each and see how we go. Also, there is no shame in being a cleaner, OP clearly thinks there is though Hmm. When I was growing up sometimes my DM was a SAHM, sometimes she worked and we had a cleaner and sometimes she was a cleaner. It just depended on finances vs
time. People get so funny about these things. I hope we can afford one in Sept as I will hopefully be working full time whilst doing a Masters and DP always works mad hours....

Ghoulwithadragontattoo · 02/03/2012 14:52

You see I actually think that the premise of the OP, that children need to learn to clean up after themselves is a good one. I think it is hard to start doing that as an adult if you didn't do it as a child.

BUT I just find it so much better to pay for someone to do my cleaning. I don't like it, I'm not motivated to do it, DH and I like the house to look nice and having a cleaner does mean that we keep on top of it better so always looks OK. I'm not even working at the moment but I don't think that obliges me to do all the cleaning.

PopcornMouseInBoots · 02/03/2012 14:56

DH and I both have health issues; our cleaner has been a godsend. It means our house is much tidier too, which is lovely, as it needs to be tidy for her to clean.

mrsseed · 02/03/2012 17:51

our cleaner saved our marriage, I am not exagerating. Both worked full time and wanted to spend every minute we could with dd1. But house got really dirty and we argued...a lot.
Oh yeah and I kept them on when on maternity leave with dd2and now only work part time. Best money I ever spent.
Kids have to tidy as this is different from cleaning and help with cooking, gardening and clean up, so they get to learn and take respnsibilty and I get to spend more time with them.

Original poster
OrkaLiely · 02/03/2012 17:51

vincettenoir - how long does your cleaner spend at your house if you only pay her £10?

OP posts:
ViviPru · 02/03/2012 17:54

our cleaner saved our marriage

That's it. Right there.

Pornyissue · 02/03/2012 17:57

Bad message? Lol!

Despite having a cleaner, I still have do housework everyday, probably like most people- the cleaners just do the deep clean.

Most of this is done while dc 1 is at school and dc2 is only months old so I think, thank heavens, they have been saved from the bad message!

Oh and dc1 still has to tidy every day and make her bed etc

mrsrosieb · 02/03/2012 17:58

Having a cleaner sends out a positive message to kids-work hard and you can enjoy little luxuries.

I work as an area manager for a large cleaning company. Many of the staff I manage are salt of the earth. Some of these people would be better off financially on benefits yet they get up at 4am to clean factory urinals. I have nothing but respect for them.

Original poster
OrkaLiely · 02/03/2012 18:23

mrsrosieb pay them a decent wage and then they wouldn't be better off on benefits Sad

OP posts:
Pagwatch · 02/03/2012 18:28

Oh good lord. Sad faces.

I pay my cleaners £10. They don't do any crappy jobs. I worked as a cleaner when I was 18. It isn't a sweatshop job.

Do you want me to sack them. Would that be better?

Pagwatch · 02/03/2012 18:29

£10 per hour.

Original poster
OrkaLiely · 02/03/2012 18:50

Do what you like, Pag. Sad face was for the poor buggers cleaning urinals for less than the pittance they'd get on benefits.

OP posts:
Pagwatch · 02/03/2012 18:55

I think people choosing work is admirable. When my dad was in his 50s he lost his job and got one as a hospital porter in a psychiatric hospital. He cleaned up shit because he wanted to work to pay for his family.

Most people on this thread employ domestic cleaners (which was after all the thrust of your op) pay them a reasonable wage and treat them with respect as they would anyone else who provides a service.

Picking up on commercial cleaners paid a poor wage seems a rather desperate swerve from your somewhat ill thought out op.

wordfactory · 02/03/2012 19:05

My housekeeper has been with us for almost ten years. I think that speaks volumes as to what sort of employers we are (given that we live in an area where 'do you have the name of a good cleaner' is almost the first question asked when you meet anyone new. Just behind 'what school does your DD go to')

AnnieLobeseder · 02/03/2012 19:15

I'm puzzled as to why you care how other people spend their time/money. And why do you focus on cleaners particularly. Should one parent from each couple quit their job to avoid paying for childcare? Should I stop paying for my shopping to be delivered cos I could be spending my Saturday or Sunday afternoon in supermarket hell? Should I stop buying clothes because I could make my own? Perhaps we should all move back into log cabins and live off the earth to avoid paying anyone else to do anything for us like food or manufacture.

Extreme examples perhaps but I fail to see how paying someone to clean is different from paying for any other service or product.

Kione · 02/03/2012 19:35

I'd love to have a cleaner, and the message to my children will be: if you study and work hard to get a good job, you will be able to afford a cleaner. If you want to.

LikeAnAdventCandleButNotQuite · 02/03/2012 19:41

Thing is, it makes sense that if you do not enjoy something, and can afford to out-source it, why wouldn't you?

n.b I do not have, nor can I afford a cleaner.

RevoltingPeasant · 02/03/2012 19:57

yy mrsseed

DP and I are not wealthy but we pay £23 a week for our cleaner. That is £8ph for 2.5 hours + petrol money.

This means that when we get in from work at 8pm we don't have to start hoovering. I can work this weekend to meet a deadline without its meaning that my only free time will be spent scrubbing the loo.

My cleaner got forced to retire before the anti-age discrimination came in but her state pension is a pittance so she supplements it by cleaning. She cleans for me and a couple of colleagues and I reckon makes about £70 pw off it. Why not? What is bad about this, for anyone? Confused

Agree it sends a good message to children: cleaning is real work which is worth money. You can do it yourself to save money but it's not done by women relatives fairies, it is an actual job.

Original poster
OrkaLiely · 02/03/2012 21:04

I was making a point to a specific poster, Pag - hence I addressed the post to her.

OP posts:
Pagwatch · 02/03/2012 21:10

Yes
And my point is that you have chosen to ignore almost all of the many responses to your op but instead have picked up on one post about commercial cleaners.

LadyBeagleEyes · 02/03/2012 21:16

I am a cleaner, needs must and all that.
But if I had the money I would have one like a shot, I hate doing my own housework.

MrsTerryPratchett · 02/03/2012 21:16

I'd like to spend time playing with my DD. If I have a cleaner, that means I can and when she picks stuff off the floor and eats it I feel a bit better.