Honest question regarding children and public transport

[Crisolate]

Is it really so wrong to expect a child to give up their seat on a packed bus or train? Conversely just because you have a ton of shopping and the bus is packed, should you expect someone to give up their seat for your child?

And by child I mean ages eight and up.

I have to admit I get fairly hacked off when a bus is packed and a parent has let their three kids all sit down when there are elderly people without a seat.

Also my brother is legally blind and parents seem to be happy to let him stand and cling onto a pole or hang by a strap while their children hang all over his guide dog.

Also why is it shocking a blind person has to stand up. There isn't anything wrong with their legs. Its very patronising tbh to suggest they cant possibly stand.

Yes, children should give up seats to those who need them more. That doesn't mean able-bodied adults though. It does mean anyone who is wobbly on their pins.

I use the service bus with my class a few times a year. It is part of the risk assessment that they all must have a seat. I teach 10 year olds.

Minimiss are you kidding me?

A blind person is missing one of their senses. An essential one for analysis of the environment and balance. Are you really that ignorant?

I was raised to give up my seat for any grown-up. We didn't have a car, so this happened a lot and seems totally normal to me. I think it's a nice custom: shows respect for elders.

However, I feel a bit ambivalent about enforcing it with my dcs now, as nobody else seems to. I will of course make them give up seats for someone in need, but for an adult just out of respect? No other child seems to be doing that, so my children will find this very unfair. And it would be. On the other hand, I could start the fightback...

Surely nobody needs to ask why standing on a busy bus would be hard for someone who is blind?

Anyone on public transport who is sitting should give up the seat to someone who needs it more than they do. I have given up my seat to a child more than once, because they looked likely to fall. Clearly I stand for anyone elderly or pregnant or carrying a baby, etc.

However, anyone with a special need to sit should try to make use of the disabled seats first, and ask anyone who looks able-bodied in those seats to stand. And if someone blind is getting on the bus, the driver should make damn sure they have a seat before setting off again!

Frankly on a long commute every day, I don't want to be on the lookout at every bus or tube stop for those more in need of my non-disabled seat. I don't mind being asked to stand, that's perfectly fine, but I'm not reading that book just to avoid your plight. I'm reading the book because it's a good book, and I'm blocking out the annoying, overcrowded bus/tube.

Anyone, child or adult, should give up their seat for someone who needs it more than them. I don't think that means all children should stand so adults can sit - an able-bodied adult is probably more able to stand than a child who can't find something to hold on to. I don't think you can make hard and fast rules - my dh would stand up for practically anyone, but recently hurt his leg quite badly. It wouldn't have been immediately apparent just by looking at him and I'm guessing that there quite a few other unworthy looking people taking up seats. Pregnant women are an absolute minefield unless they have a very obvious baby bump!!

7/8 is the point at which I start insisting that my DCs gave up their seat for any deserving case (including toddlers), and being firm about suppressing whingeing about standing and stopping them racing for vacated seats. It is also the point at which friendly young commuters stopped offering them seats.

Below that age they are not as capable of standing safely (and non-disruptively) on a moving vehicle as an able-bodied adult so I think they should get a seat if possible (on my knee if possible, though I normally stood). Above that age I still don't insist that they give seats up to random apparently able-bodied adults (who probably wouldn't take them anyway) - I expect them to play by the same rules as I do, and show normal consideration for their fellow passengers.

Loving oldmum's idea about making it illegal to stand on public transport - the five mile daily walk to work and back would certainly keep me fit, but it would be quite timeconsuming.

Why should they give an able bodied person their seat that they have paid for? No, i would not tell my child to do that, only if person was elderly, pregnant, less able bodied

There is something very depressing about society when you get on a bus filled with schoolchildren, who are all sprawled on the seats, while elderly people and pregnant women are standing up. Yet I have seen it happen on a daily basis.

I also think in this day and age, when health and safety is a big issue, and seatbelt laws are in force in almost every vehicle, it is absurd that we have buses which allow passengers to stand while the vehicle is moving. One slam of the brakes and everyone goes flying...

If you pay for a seat you are entitled to sit in it simple.

Fabby - think I love you. You old wind-up merchant you

rulebritannia I know how bus fares work thank you. I had to use buses most of my life until I learnt to drive.
When we were kids it was seen as the rule that kids had to give up their seat as they had either only paid half or were on for free. On our rural routes we also didn't have people standing very much so you did appear to pay for a seat. City bus drivers are too quick to drive off and then brake harshly to stand

I like the "you paid for it, you can sit in it" approach. Next time I fancy a seat on the bus I shall wave my ticket at some free-loading pensioner and demand their seat

Everyone should be ready to give their seat to someone who needs it more than them. But I don't see why children should stand for an able-bodied adult. I hadn't really considered it before as mine are still too little to stand safely, but I'll probably just teach them to look out for anyone who needs the seat more, or anyone who asks for a seat.

I see children as one of the vulnerable groups who are more entitled to a seat than all able-bodied adults.
We use public transport at least a few times a week, but I have never got on a bus without being sure there is a seat for my child. If there aren't any seats, or the queue looks too big for us to have any hope of getting a seat, we don't get on. I am not quite so strict about trains and tubes, but thank God we live in a small city oop North and nowhere near London!
Personally, I would give up my seat to anyone who is elderly, pregnant, disabled, or someone with (a) smaller child/ren, rather than ask my 9 year old DS to stand.

@cremeeggtheif
'I see children as one of the vulnerable groups who are more entitled to a seat than all able-bodied adults'
Seriously if you have a 9 yo boy who is not capable of standing on a bus you need to enrol him in Gym classes to improve his balance strength and co-ordination.

I still make dd sit on my knee if it's too full, and she's 10! I do offer her the option of standing or she can sit with dd2 (toddler, so not old enough to realistically stand on moving bus) on her knee and I will stand. I have had some elderly men get a bit (jokingly) offended at me though , so if I'm offering to stand I normally try to find an elderly lady to give the seat to first.

When DS was younger I definitely wanted him to be seated and got annoyed with selfish able bodied adults who would race to seats.
Not only he was small and vulnerable in a crowd, but was scared of standing in a moving vehicle.

However, he is 7 now, he is not so scared and I'll tell him to stand up for someone in need (not able bodied adults). I still use my body to protect him from pushing crowds, though.

I see children as one of the vulnerable groups who are more entitled to a seat than all able-bodied adults

Partially because they pay a reduced fare, when I was younger it was a condition of carriage that children should give up their seats for adults paying the full fare.

Growing up my parents would sit me on their knee if the bus was full or I would stand beside them. I was also brought up to give up my seat for the elderly or those I considered more needy of a seat than I.

It makes me sad though that I don't see the same thing happening as often these days. On the way to work I often see parents allowing their children to remain seating when an elderly passenger boards the bus.

It's a no brainer to me - weans should sit on a knee when small, or stand for an adult if they can. I hate seeing parents allow their kids to take a whole seat. My DD aged 14 won't get the same bus to school as I get to nursery since I shamed a (cute teenage) lad into getting up to give me and dd2 who was about 2 at the time a seat. She would rather be late for school than travel with me

I have taught my older ones to always give their seat up to anyone who needs it more (and they always do), but I don't think they should jump up out of their seat if an able bodied adult gets on

CremeEgg, at what age do you think your ds should not get preference for seating?