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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

that I'm upset friend who miscarried has deleted me from facebook now I'm pregnant?

117 replies

Medi1982 · 11/02/2012 13:17

My friend had a miscarriage recently and I organised our friends' to visit and we brought gifts to try and cheer her up. I then unexpectedly found out I was expecting a baby. We've been at some events together where understandably my pregnancy has been like the elephant in the room with it mentioned by friends in whispers when she's not in the room or not at all but she has recently deleted me as a friend on FB. I can understand to an extent but what's upsetting is that she's quite happy to comment on friend's pictures of their babies and children. But the whole time it makes me feel guilty!!

OP posts:
AThingInYourLife · 12/02/2012 10:19

I think if she went to the trouble of deleting (rather than hiding) you, she is pissed off with you, and not just protecting herself.

Why didn't you tell her yourself about your pregnancy rather than let her find out in public from mutual acquaintances?

wannaBe · 12/02/2012 10:27

but people are damned if they do, damned if they don't here aren't they?

People are saying that finding out about peoples' pregnancies is difficult for them, so people try to not make a big deal out of it and then people feel excluded? Clearly there's no right or wrong way to deal with it.

Thumbwitch · 12/02/2012 10:27

AThing, are you making stuff up? the OP said she texted her friend at the same time as she told other people, so the friend didn't "find out in public from mutual acquaintances"

Wahwahs · 12/02/2012 10:40

You have hit on something that at the minute I feel very strongly about. There are a few quesions here, really.

Is she BU to be grieving, upset, overwhelmed - of course not, and I don't think the OP has com across as anything other than hugely supportive to her friend.

Are you BU to be upset that she has deleted you (and for people who use fb, this is the same as not having the phone answered to you, etc) - not at all. I would have been really hurt by this, too. You have done nothing 'insensitive' by getting pg, or indeed allowing other people to know. If you hadn't told her, etc then that would be a different matter.

Is she BU in having deleted you? Well, yes, she has actually, imo. But you are allowedto be U for a little while when dealing with grief and disappointment. Anyone with a heart (which seems like you, OP) understands this.

I, too, believe that some shoddy behaviour gets excused in all matters relating to having a baby. It is not just all about her, it is also about the OP as well. It is not ok to hurt other people just because you are hurting. However, if you do, close loved ones will understand an forgive you - but not forever.

Sorry, this is long!!! But am facing this from the 'other side' and really b elieve that I am allowed to be cut some slack. I am not allowed to demand that thewole world revolves around me, and that I am the only one who can be hurt or snubbed or dealing with a life chngingevent.

Forgive her, OP, congrats on your pg, she is BU but that is ok for now. Smile
x

AThingInYourLife · 12/02/2012 10:54

Hmm, I didn't read where she said that, perhaps I am making things up, that was the impresion I got.

I think it is appalling for people to be whispering about a pregnancy when a woman who just miscarried leaves the room.

There is no respect or consideration in carrying on like that.

Whispering behind someone's back is unpleasant even where they don't deserve a little bit of extra kindness.

She must have felt like her miscarriage made her into a social pariah. How awful.

StateofConfusion · 12/02/2012 11:54

I had a mmc before christmas, my sil is pregnant, I've simply 'hidden' her from my news feed.

However every single time she's mentioned, or she comments on a photo I post for example, pain bubbles up inside me, knowing ill spend the rest of my life watching a neice or nephew that's the same age as my child should be. Tbh she has been extremely insensitive, never mentioned it, just ignored the whole mc. But I'm biting my tongue.
--im also completely avoiding seeing her--

NoOnesGoingToEatYourEyes · 12/02/2012 12:04

No wannabe, it's not a case of being damned either way.

But the OP is upset because she was deleted from Facebook without being spoken to by her friend first.

Yet she broke the news of her pregnancy to her friend by text and to everyone else in person, and there has been whispering and an elephant in the room every since.

In my own experience I would have appreciated a face to face conversation or a telephone call to let me know about my SIL's fourth pregnancy, which came just a couple of months after I had given birth to our stillborn son.

Instead, the entire family on DH's side were whispering behind our backs and waited until I was pregnant again to break the news to me.

I can honestly say that all any bereaved parent wants is for their baby and their loss to be acknowledged. It's awful to feel that people are not speaking to you about their pregnancy because you have lost a baby. If the OP had spoken to her friend, the friend might have felt better able to cope with Facebook updates about the pregnancy.

On the SANDS forum I have seen countless people feel like they are being treated as if miscarriage or baby loss is catching in some way, mainly because people don't know what to do or say and so don't say anything, or stop talking when you are in the room, or whisper so you don't hear them.

And honestly, the best thing anyone can do is be brave enough to speak to you in person or by telephone and give you the chance to be treated as you would have been before your loss. Even if you then still find scan pictures and statuses about pregnancy too hard to see sometimes, it might have made the difference in this case between the friend deleting the OP and speaking to her to say she was struggling but didn't want to lose her over it.

I've seen this said a lot on here but if your friendships and relationships are worth anything then they are important enough not to be directed through texts and Facebook updates.

And still, when someone is in such early stages of grief for a lost child, it's not giving them the right to behave however they like if you make a few allowances for something like a Facebook deletion. To someone outside the loss it may seem like a long time ago but to the friend it is raw and new and seems like yesterday. I still have days when I feel like am right back to day one and my first loss was five years ago now.

There's a link here that touches on how a loss feels and one of the things it says is "You know you can die bitter, or die thankful. There is no in-between."

That's true, and most people I know who have been through a loss (and one woman I know who has lost two babies to stillbirth and nine more to miscarriage) would agree with that. But I am also sure that all of them would add that even though they try and mostly succeed at being thankful, there are still days when the bitterness wins no matter what you do.

We don't enjoy those days, and we don't like ourselves very much when they happen. And all we can do is hope that people are understanding and not judge us too harshly when they do happen, because nine times out of ten it's because we have tried very hard not to let it show and just, for a few minutes or hours, we can't keep it to ourselves anymore.

And that's when we need friends to understand that we don't mean to hurt them, in the same way they might not have meant to hurt us, and be a little forgiving of things like this.

bejeezus · 12/02/2012 13:03

Is she speaking to you in real life? How often do you see her, has she cancelled anything?

jellybeans · 12/02/2012 13:10

Good post NoOnesGoingToEatYourEyes.

Wannabe, quite often it is pregnancy that is upsetting (as some people on here have mentioned after their losses) and not generally children. It is sometimes hard watching a child the age your child should be as well though.

A friend and I were due at the same time. My baby was born premature (my 2nd late loss) and too early to survive :( but she had her DD and I hated seeing her in the early days because it felt like she was rubbing it in my face. That sounds ridiculous if you have never been through it but that is how it felt. It was hard seeing the 'naivity' of pregnant people talking about 'going for scans' and assuming they will get a baby at the end when you know it can go awfully wrong. However, I always spoke to her, congratulated her and asked her about the baby, although i felt rubbish for the rest of the day. Anyway, five years on her DD started school. It was hard as DD would have been in the same class. I was quite able to ask her how her DD had got on and I chat to her as any other friend now. I truly think this is because she is able to talk about my losses, show open empathy, and even when it was hard (she rushed after me once when I was trying to get away!) she enquired to my face how I was. I will always thank her for that and when the grief became less overwhelming everything was alright.

StateofConfusion · 12/02/2012 15:08

Fantastic post from noones really very good.

Wahwahs · 13/02/2012 10:18

Jellybeans I think it is as much to do with your sensitivity to her as hers to you that you can both cope with this Smile

Heleninahandcart · 13/02/2012 10:52

NoOnesGoing has said it all.

OP whether you want to hear it or not you could have handled announcing the news of your pregnancy better. You tried to spare her feelings and did what you thought was best for her but she was clearly struggling. She may well have appreciated you telling her in person rather than text (after the news was out). Sometimes we don't know how to deal with someone else's grief, the worst thing is to avoid it as this can feel like a further blow.

For all you know, the delete button could have been pressed in a low moment of sadness and rage, maybe something about your pregnancy was the trigger, maybe it was something else entirely. It's easily done.

If you would like to be close again, I would talk to her.

giraffes · 13/02/2012 11:11

hi - just to add from my experience fwiw - I mc twins at 16 weeks, and was very very down afterwards. I was amazed how many people barely mentioned it, or said 'i didn't know what to say so I didn't call you' as if it was my problem! I would have deeply appreciated being able to talk about it, and the loss to be acknowledged.
A few months later, a very good friend who lives abroad then emailed to ask me to call her - we only ever chat via email, so I called and she told me she was pg with twins. IMO this was the right way for her to break the news. I would have hated to find out from someone else.

I kept up w her and her pg a lot less than if I hadn't been through the mc, and then when the twins were born it took me quite some time to open the pics, and when I did I was devastated. I have been in her country since they were born, but couldn't face going to see them. However, on the next visit, I will go see them but I'm nervous about what my reaction might be. I haven't told her how I feel, not wanting to in any way affect her happiness, but it has been very difficult and I'm sure she has noticed I've withdrawn a bit.

Your friend probably finds it easier to comment on baby pics than pregnancy news. She needs to deal with her loss in her own way and may not want to remind you of her loss, or somehow deflate you - in other words, she might be being considerate of you as well as thinking about herself. Give her time. Keep communication open.

spottymerlin · 15/02/2012 14:07

I miscarried and my sister became pregnant a few months later.
She totally rubbed my nose in it. She emailed me a pic of the scan which I just couldn't talk to her about. I opened it and the pain I felt was just unbearable.
I didn't go see my family at Christmas because I just couldn't bare to be around her. I called them on xmas day and she had a massive go at me down the phone whilst i was all alone and feeling really down because I didn't congratulate her scan picture.
She hung up and none of my family called me back to see if I was OK. I felt like an outcast. I must admit I almost took my own life that day.
I have since become very distant from all of them and feel very alone in the world.
I am still trying to have a baby.

farfallarocks · 15/02/2012 14:33

NoOnesGoingToEatYourEyes you have summed it up beautifully

OP she is in a hell hole right now and probably just can;t deal with facebook announcements. I find facebook so much harder than any real life communication. I find people telling me they are pregnant very difficult but am fine with babies and kids, maybe she is the same.

No one wants to feel like this, its horrible to feel bitter and jealous and angry but sometimes you can't help it and then you feel guilty for feeling like that in the first place. i would hope my friends don;t know how I feel deep down, I really really try and hide it and 'fake' happiness for them whereas inside I just want to scream that its so unfair. You are just a constant reminder of what she has lost and that is not your fault but she is trying to protect herself

Talk to her, be the bigger person, she is hurting, a lot.
I also agree that although you were trying to be sensitive, she probably feels like yuo are all gossiping about her.

MarriedInVegas · 15/02/2012 14:44

I see why your upset at this but please don't take it to heart! After having my first mc i turned into a Envy monster! i turned so judgmental about literally every mum/mum2b i saw! I was deciding in my head which families looked like they DESERVED their children Shock, how would they be able to justify why their children survived when mine didn't, commenting on others parenting skills and just generally being quite horrible Sad !

When one of my best friends announced her second pregnancy (at a meal out) i made an excuse to leave the table, went home and just cried out of sheer frustration/jealousy. It does very strange things to you! so you are nbu but then again neither is she as you just do whatever you can to get yourself through it.

Huge congratulations tho to you and your dp!!!! Smile Grin Smile

MarriedInVegas · 15/02/2012 14:49

spotty thats so awful, some people really are wrapped up in themselves! keep your chin up tho, there is usually light at the end of a dark tunnel. i, like many others have been where you are... dd is now the light of my life and makes it all worthwhile! good luck ttc! xx

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