to have wanted to slap this "Mum"?

[HassledAndHarrassedMummy]

Just been to pick my daughter up from playschool and two of the other Mums were talking about toys thier kids play with......
The long and short of it was that one of the mums was talking about how her son wanted a dora doll and that her and her husband thought it wasn't "normal" for him to want a doll and he should be playing with cars and other "manly stuff". Blah blah blah. She just kept saying that it wasn't normal.
AIBU to be completely aggrieved by what this woman was saying??? My DS got a cooker for his 2nd b'day as this is what he wanted and more recently my DD got a Thundercats sword for Xmas as she was absolutely deperate for it. Are my children not going to be normal because of this??? Have I ruined there lives by not buying them the correct toys?
I didn't say anything. I just rolled my eyes, but since I got home I have been quietly seething about this woman?
I'm not BU? Am I?

It's indicative of her day to day language. However we may be over thinking the mental processes of a person who ends antsy posts with random and misplaced lols.

cornflower you might have meant it but you still used it incorrectly.

YABU - she wasn't saying it to you. You were (albeit inadvertantly) eavestropping on her conversation with another mum. Why feel so judged??? Have you really got nothing else to worry about? Possibly you have, but if so are wasting energy focusing on this relatively unimportant triviality. You're never going to agree with everyone, you know..

I don't blame you for rolling your eyes or thinking the woman was an idiot.
I'd also feel a bit sorry for the child of a person I thought was an idiot....

But luckily, none of what she said is going to have any effect on you.

It's not indicative at all, I swear on here sometimes but hardly at all in real life.,

Compared to a child being abused/beaten/starved/tortured - this is trivial. That is the point I was making Posie.

hintofpedantry I beg to differ.

I had expected the mum to have done something really outrageous!

Vino - blimey - am struggling to think of something that isn't trivial compared to those things.

MN would never survive if only important things were on AIBU

I don't get the point of asking AIBU if you were so sure you weren't?

YANBU, there was a thread here yesterday where someone phoned social services on a woman because she was discussing getting pregnant again in front of her child, and had had sex with him in the room when he was a baby- I don't see how this is any less 'abusive' than that as it directly hurts the child (being told he is 'abnormal') and forces him into her adult gender role ideals before he can even understand it. But I'm going to run off and ignore the conventionalists who are going to go psycho about that being a comparison because they can't concieve of anything other than current ideals.

not giving a boy dollies to play with us not abusive. Nor is discussing pregnancy in front of a child. Not having sex with a baby in the room.

I'm happy to be labelled a conventionalist if that means someone who doesn't set up straw man nonsenses to argue against to prove I'm right.

Not giving a dolly to a boy is not abusive, not giving him one because he's a boy is backward, at best.

Cornflower I love it - feel an urge to name change coming on.

I think the 'slap' was obviously, metaphorical
Still agree ww Posie. I'm always impressed by how tolerant people are of the most flagrant sexism and misogyny
It's only a matter of time until we get 'haven't you got anything more important to worry about?'

I remember another mum commenting on the fact that DS1 had a little doll buggy, saying she thought they were for girls. I just said that men push buggies, so why not boys. Hopefully I made her think

The buggy contained a Brio Train, so hopefully DS1 s gender and sexuality are all where they should be

Glad to have been of service, hint

YANBU to be annoyed when you hear gender stereotyping.

"I know some people do think like that normally blokes but to actually hear someone saying that out loud...."

Wow, that sounded a lot like stereotyping a gender there OP.

Hahaha.

My 12 yo DS would rather eat his own spleen than play with a doll, wear pink, have long hair, play at kitchens.

My DD likes dolls, pink, teddy bears.

They have always been like this.
I have no intention of encouraging them to do anything other than what they choose.

I like this high horse I have ridden in on

Wow op you are getting a really start time on here! Is there a full moon tonight?!
Yanbu to be annoyed by this silly woman - too many idiots have this view

Wanting to slap someone does not normalise violence. Violent feelings are normal. Not acting on your violent feelings is important in civilised society, but you can feel what the hell you like.

It's really interesting that there is such a need to defend the mum who says it's not normal for a boy to play with a doll, though everyone is canny enough to realise that admiring thru secretly agree would not be cool on mn....

Stupid auto correct... Admitting they....

Christ, OP, bet you wish you hadn't bothered posting YANBU at all.

Wibbly- that's not what the other thread was about.

Some people use the word 'normal' when they really mean 'usual', it obviously will not be usual if they are denied the chance.

People say things without realising. I jokingly said to a dad to stop using gender stereotypes during a contact session (afterwards) when talking to him, it hadn't occured to him that he was actually putting his own role down as a male parent,yet it was himwho had struggled toprovide the childcare and hoped to get his children back.