parenting boys is different to all girls or mixed siblings

[captainbarnacle]

(and not that old 'boys are like puppies' theory)

My dad and stepmum were down at the weekend. She is mum to DD1, DS1, DD2 (in their 30s) and I have 3DS (aged 5, 3 and 7m). My Dad was talking about how 'good' my sister and I were when we were small, and I was saying how young brothers seem (anecdotally) to be quite different to female siblings in terms of noise, boisterousness and generally Hard Work.

My stepmum (I have a lot of time for her) piped up that her three didnt behave 'like that' and - of course - she had a boy.

I stated that of course not all girls and boys are the same, but having 2 boys close in age has more of a fighting and noise effect than one boy sandwiched between girls. Then I thought I was just being over defensive, and STFU.

Am I wrong? Should I be expecting more from my two? They dont cause too much hassle - just dont sit still or eat all their food or sit quietly and do as they are told (no breaking toys or drawing on walls or climbing on furniture etc). They wrestle and answer back (but I deal with it). Or was SM looking back 30yrs with rosetinted glasses on and forgetting the enormity of 3 under 5s?

you may as well say 'parenting one bunch of kids is different from parenting a different bunch of kids'

because that's the nub of it.

My sisters and I fought like cats in a sack when we were young. We were never encouraged to be passive. When my brother came along he wasn't much different (still isnt.)

DS is a quiet soul and hates noise. His troup of cousins, all male, are a mixture. But all well, behaved and can sit still and be quiet when required to.

Well,I've ordered those two books :)

My 5 yr old has been at school for over a year (August baby) and 3 yr old is a sept baby (this is a whole new thread!) so home for another yr and a half. Five yr old loves reading and writing stories and other such quiet table activities, but the relatives never see that part. they only see the stressful meals out or hyper mornings stuck in.

Why do infant boys spend playtime fighting and girls don't?

Laughing at the idea of "pushing" ds to do or play with anything he doesn't want to! I don't think that would be possible!

captain, I dont know about other girls, but I do remember that my favorite playtime game at primary school was "War".
But then I do have a lot of testosterone.

"Why do infant boys spend playtime fighting and girls don't?"

They don't.

Some do. Some girls do. Maybe you're just noticing the boys more. Maybe more boys are socialised in such a way that this is seen more, and is therefore more accepted/acceptable.

I mean, are you saying all infant boys spend time play fighting and no girls do? If not, then your question is nonsense.

I have one of each. They have some stereotypical girl/boy traits and some un-stereotypical ones. I'm drawing the conclusion that it's because they're individuals and not because one is a boy and one is a girl.

But out of the fighty ones, most are boys.

I'm going with the social conditioning answer here. Of course this is all sweeping generalisations, but there are trends evident - allbeit anecdotally.

I don't! I reward the non stereotyped behaviour (ie table work) and spend time trying to find out why ds1 in particular has the need to fight and punch (he physically aches to get stuck in).

I certainly notice boys fight more because I spend more time with other boys than girls.