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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think that DH should pump the petrol?

83 replies

tyler80 · 30/01/2012 09:34

OH Doesn't drive, i think that it's only fair that he gets out the car and stands in the cold and puts petrol in the car when he's with me. he says it's always the drivers job. Who's right?

OP posts:
KatAndKit · 30/01/2012 09:36

Can't you take it in turns if it's such a big deal to you?

EauDeLaPoisson · 30/01/2012 09:37

It's nice for him to offer but if he is that lazy he can't be arsed to get out his seat and fill up then you probably have bigger issues

ObiWan · 30/01/2012 09:39

Does he know how? Non-drivers often don't.

kelly2525 · 30/01/2012 09:39

Its the drivers job, I wouldnt take the risk of someone else doing it, especially someone that doesnt drive, what if he put diesel in by mistake?

JerichoStarQuilt · 30/01/2012 09:39

No one is 'right'! DH doesn't drive and I don't notice which of us does it - whoever has a bank card on hand pays, I think. If one of you queues to pay while the other pumps it is faster, too (only if you can do it without holdin up the queue, obviously).

TBH, though, if you are tired from driving he should do it and I admit, if I were constantly driving someone around I would expect them to do it if I said I was cold and tired, I wouldn't expect them to say 'it's the driver's job' - that just seems rude, like being treated as a free taxi.

TeacupTempest · 30/01/2012 09:40

If I drive DH fills. If he drives I fill. Not sure why it's just the routine we are in.

ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged · 30/01/2012 09:40

Driver does petrol. Passenger goes in & pays picking up chocolate & drinks for the journey while they're there

JerichoStarQuilt · 30/01/2012 09:41

kelly - FWIW, it's not possible to put diesel in a petrol car (it is possible the other way around though) because of the shape of the pumps.

It could be he doesn't want to admit he doesn't know how - but it is not hard and useful for him to learn, so maybe ask him?

Cabrinha · 30/01/2012 09:42

Who's right? You'd ask that on an Internet forum?
Surely that's something you need to work out for yourselves.

FWIW, my husband and I are in each other's cars about 50/50. So driver does it - because they're paying too, so no point in both getting out.

You sound lazy, expecting him to do it all the time.

tyler80 · 30/01/2012 09:42

i'd settle for taking turns to be honest

aibu to call him a big baby because he claims he doesn't know how? Grin

OP posts:
cutegorilla · 30/01/2012 09:45

Offer to show him! One fills the other pays here.

IUseTooMuchKitchenRoll · 30/01/2012 09:46

I like it when my dh does it for me, he is a much better driver than me and I have no reason to think he wouldn't do it right just because I am behind the wheel.

I know thi sight not go down well on MN, but I think it is the gentlemanly thing for a man to do for his wife, and I would be a bit narked if dh stopped doing it.

StrandedBear · 30/01/2012 09:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JerichoStarQuilt · 30/01/2012 09:47

cab - how is she lazy, she's doing all the driving, not 50/50 like you and your DH? Confused

tyler - don't call him a baby, just talk to him about the fact you drive him everywhere!

Popoozle · 30/01/2012 09:49

Well, if DH & I are both in the car together then usually the passenger does the petrol. I don't think there is a "right or wrong" way though. Confused

toddlerama · 30/01/2012 09:50

I like it when DH does the petrol for me. It's up there with holding doors, so some people like it, some don't.

tyler80 · 30/01/2012 09:51

i have offered to show him how btw

it would just be nice to have him do this to show some appreciation for the fact that i drive 100% of the time while he sleeps

OP posts:
AndiMac · 30/01/2012 09:51

In our cars it's always the driver who fills the tank. Unless DH offers when I'm driving, but I'm prepared to do it.

ChasTittyBeltUp · 30/01/2012 09:52

Why doesn't he learn to drive?

Blu · 30/01/2012 09:53

I wish DP would do the tyres. That's the job I really hate. (I do all car related jobs as it's my car and he doesn't drive)
Petrol? Who cares!

JerichoStarQuilt · 30/01/2012 09:54

tyler, have you actually told him that, and not just when you're sitting at the petrol pump trying to get him to do it?

I don't disagree with what you're saying but I am a bit confused what we're going to say that is going to change the way you and he do things.

CuntWorm · 30/01/2012 09:54

Our local garages wont turn the pump on if the driver stays in their seat and the passenger pumps, to make sure they don't make offwith the petrol.

dodgy area

suburbandream · 30/01/2012 09:54

TBH it never occurred to me to offer to put the petrol in, even though DH does all the driving when we go out as a family! I drive the DCs to school etc but if we are all together he'll drive. If the car needs petrol I'm happy to fill it up but I would naturally think it's the driver's job. If it bothers you that much then yes, make him do it Smile

littlemisssarcastic · 30/01/2012 09:56

In my car, the driver fills up, and the passenger pays with the drivers money. Grin
Usually, I am on my own so I fill up and pay too. Never really thought about it as a chore to be delegated to someone else. I will be sharply reminded now it is going to get very cold shortly.

Disclaimer - I am the driver of my car and my passenger is DS.

Now, checking the tyres is a whole different ball game. Grin

tyler80 · 30/01/2012 09:59

he's not allowed to drive for medical reasons. as he's never going to do any share of the driving it would be nice if he filled the car up once in a while (it's not a money thing , he pays half the running cost )

OP posts:
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