People who are late for school every day or almost every day.

[MrsJAlfredPrufrock]

Why don't you just get up 15 mins earlier?

Feels like crap if you turn up every day to school with a child who hasn't eaten because they keep refusing to even try to eat. Especially if they are prone to meltdowns & irrational thinking anyway, and especially prone when hungry.

I gave the school the choice of child a bit late but probably fed or child ontime who probably hadn't eaten and they'd have to feed (they have a toast club for such refuseniks!) and they said toast club, probably for statistical reasons, but I wasn't thrilled. Eventually I came up with a reward system to get DS to eat.

The whole "barring SN" caveat people trot out makes me sigh... what if the child (or the parent for that matter) has undiagnosed SN, or child goes on/off the SEN register? Does the "SN get out" clause still apply? How can folk be so certain about other people's lives?

BTDT Princess. :)

We don't HAVE a telly, let alone watch it in the mornings everlong , and we can't get up too much earlier because we have exactly the same "hilarity" at bed-times, and my youngest needs all the sleep she can get.

Is she SN, Princess? Nothing diagnosed as yet, but even if she doesn't have a medical condition, she still has behavioural rpoblems that aren't resolving themselves with age and ;maturity.

Hence the "ragged"?

It might help if schools allowed a slightly longer interval between 'school gates open' and 'child must be in classroom'. Because getting up early just to stand on a street corner in the pissing rain for 20 minutes rather than risk being three minutes later is not something I'd be prepared to do.

Annoys me too even though I know it is NONE of my business and doesn't affect me in ANY way. I just feel "if I can get my act together and be on time, why can't you? A friend and I shared drop-off's for a couple of terms and agreed on 8.10 as a pick-up time. I was always at hers on time (she was never ready which meant I was standing around on doorstep with kids in car) and I always had my DS ready for her at 8.10 as agreed. I then always found myself hanging around by the front window, sometimes for 20 minutes waiting for her to arrive so I could run DS to the car without her having to get out. Drove me bonkers.

I don't know the children who are late because I am the saddo always there waiting for the doors to open and am back in the car by 8.40 to take DD on to Nursery. It did affect my son when I was sharing the lifts, yes, so at the end the term I managed to tactfully change the arrangement. I just hate lateness in general. I heard someone say, "being late for someody is basically saying their time is more important than yours"......

Sorry, I meant being late or somebody is basically saying your time is more important than theirs!!!

its amazing how many of parents who run late though are SAH! I have read through the thread and anyone would think that no one has mornings like you and we should all feel sorry for you...

I have a SN DS who regularly goes into meltdown in the morning and another DS who has always been at a different school, I also work full time and like to be at work early to set up for the day....guess what ; neither of my children have ever been late to school. I get up earlier than I need to to ensure that I am ready; the eldest has been 'trained' to have everything ready the night before; the youngest (with SN) is dealt with (even if that means carrying him to the car! which is hard going because of his size now but I have still done it!)

As a teacher I can say it is very disruptive to not only the late child's day, but also of the rest of their form/class if a student arrives late as the start of the lesson has to be explained to them whilst the other 29 students are left waiting.

I teach a year 11 lad who is late to school every day (by at least 30 mins) because his parents don't want him to catch the bus and therefore he has to wait until they have dropped off his brothers at primary school; what is that teaching him? How is his reference to college/first job going to look when his punctuality record is appalling? Not good parenting in my book

Well we have someone who lives 200yds from the school and drives there and is always late. Drives as there is no pavement on a very busy road with lorries, but she won't walk across one field as she does not have wellies.

my good friend has 5 dc. She has tried several methods of getting her dc to school on time. Last year 3 of them were preschoolers, this year 2 of them are and 1 is a new entrance. Pretty much every time she leaves the house the baby will be sick, the toilet trainer will need to go to the toilet or the new entrant will trip and split a lip or a knee and it is generally bedlam for her. It bothers her very much and she gets judged for it and she continues to strive to be on time but at times is just not possible.

In one of my year 11 classes, I have a student who has missed 28% of his time with me because of lateness. His attendance is officially 98% but he has missed over a quarter of his Science lessons. It matters.

I have a problem, it is Dh, he doesn't seem to understand that he should get ready while I al getting dd ready and not.after. he thinks it is ok to leave at 8.50 to get the 5 min walk to be there 8.55 whereas I would be out of the door 5 mins earlier. He doesn't even get why 4 year olds are in school. He works shifts, comes.home odd hours and disrupts kids sleeping etc.

In the first half term I was embarassed to take her late so.didn't take her on the days we were more then 5 mins late. But attendance was effected obviously so in a bid to combat that I decided however late we.are she will go in.

Maybe I should have stuck to.not taking her in when she was late so I don't disrupt others?

When my older children were little we were never late for school. My 10 yo had regular tantrums so often didn't make it into her classroom in time, but was in the car park in plenty of time . Her brothers 5, 7 and 9 were never late.

Then DH took over the school run and they were late every day. We had endless complaints but they were always late. DH can't work backwards with time, so when he had to pick me up from work at 5pm he would leave the house at 5pm, despite there being a 10-15 min journey. No amount of moaning/ reasoning/ pleading would get him into gear.

I now have just one 4 yo to get to school, and since Xmas we have been flying into school as the bell goes or just after, every single day. I get everything ready the night before. DD won't wake up in the mornings. Then she faffs. After 15 mins this morning she still hadn't finished her breakfast. I spend every morning yelling at her to get a move on. We need to be in the car by 8.40 but we never manage it. Then she gets in the car and instead of getting into her seat starts ferreting about on the floor finding treasures. I'm standing by the car door moaning at her to sit down so I can strap her in. I'm stressed out, she's away with the fairies.

The one good thing is that when we arrive at 8.55 there is a space outside school . Sadly DD has inherited her father's (lack of) get-up-and-go ness.

Excluding those who have very valid reasons for being late, I am at the number of parents/children who are persistently late for school drop off AND pick up. And at the risk of attracting a flaming, most of the parents I know who are regularly late are SAHMs! In fact one mum I know is late almost every morning. Her and her DD get up at 8ish as they are apparently 'night owls', and also they are often late as her DD takes ages over her breakfast! Getting up earlier just doesn't occur to her.

We are up at 6ish. We leave for breakfast club/nursery at 7.45am. DD is NEVER picked up late, despite me often having to rush like mad to get there if I have been held up in work.

My DM is late for EVERYTHING! I had a whole childhood of being late for school, buses, hobbies, more or less evey activity/event. The times we screeched up outside a music exam with seconds to spare and no time to prepare calmly! It's just my mum's character, and she almost treats it like a game (will I or won't I get there on time!). I had a lovely childhood, but being late all the time seriously did my head in! I could never do the same to my DCs!

I have often heard that the nearer you live to a school, the later you are in the mornings! Some people on this thread are proving that by their posts .

I am another one who ideally likes to get to the playground 2 or 3 minutes before the bell goes at 08.55. Occasionally we're early- 08.40-08.45, if we catch a bus that's on time, but I hate standing around in the freezing cold playground, so would much prefer to get there later.

Yesterday we were almost late- got there after a minute after the bell went, but DS managed to get in, so I didn't have to sign the register. This was because the traffic was so bad on the last stretch of the bus journey that it took 10 minutes to get through instead of 1. We depend on the bus on Tuesdays, because that's when DS has his school guitar lesson and our walk is 20 minutes. The only time I have had to sign the late register since September was because of the bus running late, but there have been a few times when we have got there in the nick of time.

Our mornings did feel very rushed towards the end of last term, as I wasn't getting up until 08.00 and DS wouldn't budge until 08.10 and we have to leave the house by 08.35 at the very latest, so I started getting up 10 minutes earlier since we went back and it has helped a bit. We do as much as possible the night before, so mornings are for getting dressed, going to the loo, eating breakfast, putting on shoes/coats/hats/scarves/gloves (at the beginning of every winter, you have to remember this will take extra time and factor it in) and grabbing bags and going. We try to squeeze in tooth brushing, face washing and hair combing, but we don't always have time for these, particularly the latter two, and aren't hats brilliant for those days when you haven't got the time to comb/brush hair?

IMO, if you have to choose between getting to school on time or stopping to wash your face/brush your teeth/comb your hair, getting to school on time wins. But maybe other parents would rather be late than send their DC into school with a milk moustache? I don't know, as I would like to think I don't judge late-running parents, as I don't know them or their reasons.

I get up at 6.30am and wake DS2(15) at 6.45am.
He get's in the shower at 7.25am, then comes downstairs at 7.45, gets dressed while eating breakfast, and just manages to leave at 8am for the school bus.

I get DD(10) up at 7am, she has breakfast, sign of the cross wash/cleans teeth
and is dressed ready to go by 7.40am. She even has time to read a book, while waiting for her brother.

They have missed the bus twice since Sept. due to DS2 being so slow.[bangry]

If they miss the school bus DS2 has to pay their bus fare himself out of his pocket money.[bgrin]

I remember when i was at school and the head asked for all those who had been late in the last month to raise their hands. every one that did stayed in the village and walked to school. none of those who were bussed in from the outlying communities were late as to miss the bus would have meant to miss school.

apart from public transport problems, i amnever late for work. you can guess which group i belonged to.

peoplesprincess please could you just talk to me about your DD? My DD sounds v similar- utter refusal, screaming, etc over seemingly minor things (getting dressed, going to loo, putting on shoes etc). Have you ever sought advice? I don't even know where to look for help. I have wailed to DH that her behaviour isn't normal, but I have no idea if that is true or not (I just know that our other child never has any issues in this way).

I have to dress her most days, as anything is used as an excuse, but many, many days she will strip off her clothing as fast as I can get it on so I just ignore that behaviour now, and have to say she will go in her pjs. I cannot believe your Head said they'd approach SS! What do they suggest you do? Hurt your child by forcing her clothes on her?

Ive not read the full thread but .........

At DS's school they have a saying "be in line at 10 to 9". They get marked for being on time and at the end of the week get tokens for them to spend in the school shop at the end of each half term as an incentive to get people there on time.

Im with you OP and cant understand why some people are late over and over again. DS is in yr 2 and he has been late once and that was because I had a flat tyre. I also dont understand all this "whats the problem with being late" Ive seen on this thread. I think lateness is not a good trait to have and think its not very respectable on who you are meeting. I am always always early, infact if Im less than 5 mins before the due time I panic. Ive always been like that, much less stressful.

I think where possible you should get children to school on time and teach them good time keeping skills as these are needed in the work place more than anything.

Yes there are exceptions for this such as SN and multiple children, but really dont see why this thread has had so many defensive posts from parents in this situation. The OP is obviously talking about those who are just lazy like the lady accross the road from me. There are 3 primary schools in the catchment area of my street and hers go to a different school than mine. Her school started on the Thurs after the summer hols, mine was the monday. Anyway we were woken up about 9 by her laughing about herself and therefore her children being late and she actually said "well start as the way I mean to carry on" Im usually arriving home as she's leaving. It does bother me because I think its just a bad example to set your kids and it disrupts the classroom, its just bad manners IMO.

If the title of the thread was AIBU to complain to the school as my child's teacher is always late.... I wonder what the reasponses would be?..

As a child I was often late for school, my mum has no concept that being on time is important. i hated it, as a result I am always early for everything, and if i am not early enough I suffer from real panic. (we get to the school 20 minutes early just so we can't be late). Being late is upsetting to children and rude to the teachers.

Notveryinventive I am with you completely on this. I hate being late. My mum hated being late and it has filtered down to me and my brothers and sister. Life is much less stressful if you allow plenty of time. I don't like rushing, and I don't think starting the day with a rushed and stressy parent is nice for children either.