I am in Waitrose. Would I be unreasonable...

[seeker]

......to run beserk up and down the aisles with a machine gun spraying bullets indiscriminately?

"It's like a cross between Matins in a village church and the Conservative Party Conference."

Look, if Hully kills all the rightwingy types and you raze Waitrose to the ground, you do realise that there will be no more monied types to spend spend spend and raise us all out of this depression?

Put the gun down.

My local Twatrose (no cafe, sob) is less a tory party conference and more an arena for Loud Parenting. I still snigger inwardly at the twat in the queue in front of me who spied a small boy in the uniform of a local prep school and then harranged her preschool-age boy mercilessly: 'Look, darling! There's a big boy in St. Smugface's uniform! Ooh, doesn't he look smart? You'll be in that uniform soon, won't you? Do you think he'll be your friend? Do you think you'll like it at St. Smugface?' Had I had a Kalashnikov to hand, I would have used it. The store is full of yummies with size 10 waists and braying voices. But I often bump into my friends there too, and they're all quite normal.

There is nothing serene about the Waitrose where I work at lunchtimes. It is a heaving mass of agitated shoppers. You must have to go when non-working people aren't there for it to be a serene experience!

I hate Morrisons because it is not convenient to park (spaces too small) and it is v v crowded. I love Waitrose because their staff is visible, knowledgeable and very friendly and will always help me out if I am looking for something unusual (zitty teenagers in Morrisons usually have no clue what I am asking about).

I do not differentiate between the clientele ("yummies size 10" or "riff raff") as most posters seem to. And mostly turn up in my house jogpants and DYI t-shirts and never had any problem with it...

I don't think your Waitrose's are in the north are they? Ours is not too posh and not too rough, it's just right. Nice cafe, helpful staff.

I did however come out having spent twice the amount I'd intended today just because it's all so lovely. It'll be Aldi next week to compensate.

Must be your Waitrose - mine is full of plebs like me!

You are clearly in the wrong Waitrose. Ours is delightful despite the smidgeons of sea salt.

Tesco, on the other hand, not only looks as if it has been ransacked but also appears to be staffed entirely by the Undead and Completely Fucking Disinterested.

Lol at posieparker. Seriously you prob preferred Netto for the lovely non immigrant casual child abusers.

Tesco, on the other hand, not only looks as if it has been ransacked but also appears to be staffed entirely by the Undead and Completely Fucking Disinterested.

:o Classic!

It's NOT the immigrants who are abusing their dcs ffs!! They are lone or small groups of men, no kids!! It's the British (white British, Asian British, Black British) who abuse their dcs.

MY Waitrose is where Kate Middleton does her weekly shops. Nah nah nah. Just another reason not to got there!

I can't stand Waitrose - I like the food they sell but my closest one is in the most pretentious and smug of mediocre towns (Cheltenham) and it has rubbed off on the shop.

Full of children prancing and their mothers looking smug and/or people shouting in a Jilly Cooper hooray manner across the aisles whilst wearing manure coated jodhpurs.

OP no, totally understandable. Aim for the ones with a higher than usual coefficient of smugness and entitlement please.

I lOve Waitrose...I want my ashes scattered there.
It makes me feel calm and lovely.
I popped into Asda yesterday, which was horrible..,..ok the fruit and veg were cheap, but the till staff couldn't give a stuff, and the whole store was just piled high with shit offers.

My DM's local Waitrose is across the pedestrianised road from Bargain Booze Plus, the latter is busier than the former. Why they thought it was a good idea to put one in a very deprived town, I will never know!

It's all a bit 'shall we get some more rice cakes for the Treat Jar, Jasper?' in ours.

Very playing-to-the-gallery parenting happening A LOT.

DM's one is full of yellow reduced stickers!

Ours has got a stuido Kitchen inside the cafe. God knows what goes on there. Smug cookery demos I would imagine.

I've never been in a Waitrose ...

Wotsit like Miss? Gorn tell us - please Miss?

I saw something on cbbc the other day where one of dick and Dom (not sure which) went into a tesco with Tracy beaker and they had a competition to see who would dare to shout "bogies" the loudest.

Doing that in Waitrose would be fab.

You are posting on Mumsnet from a supermarket...?

Are there any Waitrose in Scotland?

We have a Sainsbury about 20 miles away.

I don't think they are in Scotland. Go on the Waitrose site and use the storefinder?

Ours (Bath) is full of thin serene types who engage their DC in earnest convos about spelt and quinoa in the checkout queue.

I am too ashamed to be seen to purchase carbs in there - I save them for my Tesco Online Delivery Of Shame. I WANT AN ALDI! I cannot afford to schlep all the way to Brizzle to visit an Aldi!

Well, I know there are none anywhere near me so probably pointless looking.

I hate shopping anyway so I wouldn't be making any long round trips just to visit a Waitrose