to loathe the smuggery that goes with any G&T post

[FunnysInTheGarden]

' oh my dc is miles and miles ahead of her peers, but I really want her to keep it real and mix with the thick folk just so that she understands that we are all different. Obv she'll move to private for her GCSE's'

FFS, when I was young there was no G&T and we all got on with it. I would have been a G&T type, but so glad there wasn't the distinction then. Tis shite

I read somehere on the internet that only 15% of MN'ers children are not G&T.

Or was that drink G&T....

I don't mind if parents who have children who actually have been identified once in school for a few years as being exceptionally bright. They are proud - and so what? If you think that's being smug it's probably more likely to be sour grapes on your part than being smug on theirs.

Personally, the ones who annoy me more are the ones who are desperately looking for signs of their baby being exceptionally bright. Those people need to wait until those babies have been in full time education for a few years and have had a chance to sort themselves out.

perri yeah but my 7mo has figured out that if she makes a nick in the skin of a courgette ring (with her perfect pincer grip) then she can ram the whole thing in her mouth and then pull the skin out in one easy yank. I mean surely that means she is gifted?

Whatme

Whatmeworry Fri 20-Jan-12 09:03:36
"I read somehere on the internet that only 15% of MN'ers children are not G&T.

Or was that drink G&T...."

According to Xenia it's the SAHMs who drink the gin. Because they're too thick or sumfink...

Don't know who gets the tonic.

I think the OP is being very mean-spirited. Parents of exceptionally gifted children have a lot to cope with and surely need any support they can get. I'm talking kids who teach themselves Japanese at 2, stay up all night working out solutions to international conflict etc. They have special needs just as children at the other end of the spectrum and frankly I am v. grateful I don't have a real life Einstein in the house with me.

Mmmmm Entrophygirl, sounds promising...

Although I think to qualify your DD would also need to have a sound grasp of algebraic number theory and be able to play Rachmaninoff's Piano Concerto No. 3.

YANBU to loathe smuggery

YABU to say that every post about G&T is smug

G&T as in, small children being able to mix cocktails? If I did have a small child that could put together a half decent G&T I would be smugging all over MN like nobodies business.

Back to what the OP was really about - we had different streams at school. We all had our IQs tested when we were 10 and those with good scores got extra tuition.

DD can make a really decent Kir.

[smuggy smuggerson]

imagine the mere thought of sharing a house with Einstein....urgh.

I totally agreee imaginethat, exceptionally gifted people are often very odd in other ways and if you read the G&T board many people are genuinely concerned that their children are in some ways socially lacking.

The fact is that most parents who post on that board will have children who are bright rather than exceptionally gifted and of the the Stephen Hawking variety.

Personally I think the luckiest parents of all are those who have children who are good all rounders; academically bright, popular, sociable, confident and can interact equally well with adults and their peers.

If you do have an exceptionally bright child it is a child with special needs - albeit special needs at the other end of the scale that we are used to hearing about. Special needs nevertheless though. If their needs are not met they will experience problems and difficulties too.

imagine the mere thought of sharing a house with Einstein....urgh.

Quite. And all they get in return is the odd post on MN. Not fair.

Perriwinkle - I think the term giftedness has broadened in recent years. One of the definitions of gifted is the child who asks the questions as opposed to the bright child, the child who knows the answers. As I understand it, they have different styles of learning and therefore benefit from different opportunities in schools.

I really don't think it was introduced to make parents hate each other.

Nowt to be smug about, loads to worry about instead. Having a G and T child is hard work IMO.

DD is 'gifted' and has been moved up a year in school. I would NEVER mention this in rl (apart from to family) as I think it would be absolute social suicide. Some mums from her old class have given me the anyway though.
I won't be sending her to private school as I can't afford it and don't agree with it. Whether a label is given or not I think it is good that schools don't use a one size fits all approach.
Why the hell wouldn't she mix with kids of different abilities? I don't think she's different anymore than everyone is an individual.
As much as most g&t threads are dripping with smuggery (which I agree they are) a lot of the criticism also seems to be dripping with jealousy imo.

My DD APPEARED gifted when she was a toddler, she could name hundreds of shapes and had thousands of words..I did feel smug and used to dream of a rosy future for her..but didn't mean any harm by it and was just proud of/enjoying my "gifted" DD, or so I thought.

Anyway she turned out to be severely autistic, had a massive regression at 3 and now is at a school for SLDs so I certainly fell down to earth with a massive bang.

But I remember how pleased I was before and so don't judge people now because I know I was just thinking about DD and not other people's kids.

Don't recommend learning the hard way I did though.

"imagine the mere thought of sharing a house with Einstein....urgh."

Weren't there rumours he dated Marilyn Monroe.......?

If you don't like the posts on a particular subject, don't read them!

G&T can involve serious concerns, and parents can't usually talk about them in RL because of opinions like Op has voiced. As someone who was labelled G&T at school I can tell you that it can make a real difference. Would you prefer those kids were ignored and everyone was treated exactly the same? No streaming/sets? Of course, that would mean those who don't do as well (SN) should also be treated the same way... SN is SN, regardless of whether that is top set or bottom set.

And a lot of G&T kids fail to fulfill their potential if they are not stretched. Everything is too easy for them, so they do not need to work, so they do not form the habit of working, and they drop out later in life.

The thing is too that the issue has always been there but just ignored. Having a child who is much brighter than their peers is a parenting challenge. The consequences can be crap.

When i was young I was pretty advanced in a number of areas. I am not now, obviously - just one of those things.
My schools solution was that I should do work about two years ahead so I had some of my classes with the class two above mine. So I was the swotty little cow showing Glen and Kevin up. Plus my sister was in that class. Can you imagine what that did for family harmony. And the whole issue around how my parents handled my 'smart' on top of how the school handled it created divisions between myself and my siblings some of which never healed.

Anyone who thinks these issues are simply smuggery haven't thought about it.

For all the academic brightness my son has, he lacks in areas of social awareness and ability to handle emotions. He can do sums and write, which is great, but it takes more than his brightness to make sure he does well, and trying to get that extra support at school is tough. Not to mention handling him being bullied and his amazing temper and his constant need to be doing something.

Then you have my DD, she's extremely bright too. She doesn't read or write, which DS was doing by this stage. Instead she never sleeps, she never stops moving, she has no handle on any of her emotions, she is manipulative, she hurts other children through frustration, she pushes every button I have and just managing her on a daily basis is a challenge that has me sobbing on the kitchen floor last night, until my chest hurt and my nose bled.

I was that bright child and it's brought me a legacy of emotional issues and inability to understand social things. So I got put up a year in school, they just made me repeat work at the end of primary, I was filling in workbooks by memory. I did well at school, but I am absolutely shite in the workplace because I don't manage any kind of human politics at all. I spend all my time at home these days.

I don't want that for either of my children.

This thread title wins the award for the most annoying thing I have read on MN this week.

Unless you drop into conversation at every opportunity, saying 'my DC is G&T' is NOT smug or showing off, it is (assuming it is correct) a statement of fact.

It is NOT the same as saying 'my DC has got it made' - bright kids may be bullied, they may have additional SN, they may simply be bored silly at school.

Fair enough, you can't say it in AIBU or RL without people making ridiculous assumptions - I can accept that. But if you can't make this statement on the G&T board, a place designed for parents of G&T kids to find help and support, then THAT MAKES ME REALLY FURIOUS!!

I did i'm afraid get a touch annoyed at the mum at DD's nursery who said her DD had her own kind of SN like my DD (her DD is quite bright and frankly a bit high maintenance). I would swap in a flash.

But having been a gifted child at school (hard to believe I know) who was bullied I can appreciate that its not all plain sailing.

I agree with Pag, happy is the main thing.

Fanjo, I have to tell you that DS's teacher used this phrase about my DS at the last parents' evening - maybe this mum was repeating something she had been told?

Agree it was very insensitive of her to say it to you though.

I think to be fair she was just trying to show me she understood and meant well, it's my issue really.

I could never grudge people posting about their kids issues though and coming together om G And T topic for support, of course, or.doubt that there ARE issues :)