To think that people who moan on facebook about being delayed after someone has committed suicide under a train are insensitive twats?

[samstown]

One of my facebook friends has today written a moany status 'thanking' the 'idiot' who jumped under a train (am assuming he was delayed getting home because of this).

Some poor bastard has got to the a point so low in their life that they feel that the best thing they can do is end it all, and all some people can do is moan that they have been mildly inconvenienced getting home.

This isnt the first status I have seen like this either. Now granted, I am not a commuter so have not been in the position where I have been delayed on a train due to a track suicide, although I do know of a girl who ended her life under a train.

AIBU?

I don't think someone who is that deeply ill is able to empathise with the trauma their choices will inflict on the drivers or other workers who are left to clear up. I'm sure the impact their death will have on a worker's bonus is pretty far down their list of considerations too.

I'm shocked too samstown.

I would instantly de-friend that person. I can partly understand how regular commuters might feel some frustration at such delays but most reasonable people have a self edit facility and recognise that their feelings of irritation are misplaced and shouldn't be aired in a bullish defiant way on fb

I appreciate it must be inconvenient if your journey is delayed, but shocking to complain about it, given the circumstances

why does the jumper automatically have the right to inflict depression and misery on those left to clear up the bits/cope with their nightmares/deal with the aftermath, and we all have to sympathise?

Wow, I am shocked at the lack of understanding of mental illness on this thread. who said they have mental illness - they might be suicidal for any number of reasons, not just mental illness. They could be terminally ill, their mother could be terminally ill, their dog could have just died, they could have had a row with their boyfriend.... mental illness isnt always the reason

My son was on a train when someone jumped in front of it. The train came to a stop and he was left looking out at a large bloody lump of meat on the tracks for a long time. He was 14.

sorry, there are other ways of doing it.

How awful for you son, of course.
But one day someone you know may become the jumper- hopefully you wont be so scathing and try to see it from a different point of view

I really dont think someone would jump infront of a train because their dog died Frankie!

I commuted for a number of year and yes, guilty of maybe inwardly rolling my eyes at a delay but my god, I would never outwardly grumble about it.

I tell you, I would much rather my son witnessed it and lived to tell the tale than actually be the poor soul who thought they couldnt live anymore - how utterly tragic! How anyone fails to sympathise with them is beyond me and to call them a twat????? I cant even phathom how someone could think like that.

Sadly, we have become a very selfish nation all out for ourselves and sod everyone else and it's only getting worse. I pity my poor DS growing up in todays society! :(

Depressed people are not necessarily completely unable or unwilling to think of the effect their death would have on others, in fact if they're as far as contemplating suicide, they think about the deed and the aftermath in depth beforehand.

Everyone on the trains thinks "fucking hell, not again" (well, in London anyway as its a weekly occurrence), but its one of those things you just don't say out loud - a social convention that Facebook is breaking down?

You don't think suicide as a response to rows with their partners or the loss of a pet indicates a level of mental instability then?

The idea that someone tops themselves on a whim is laughable. "What shall I do today, I know I'll piss off a load of commuters by jumping in frot of their train. That'll cheer me up"

Another point worth making is that British Rail could do more to help prevent suicides on their tracks, which would obviously be better for their customers and maybe be of some help to the person who is considering ending their life that way.

They are getting better by all accounts, they do work with Samaritans and have publicised their service, but they could do more.

Ugh so sick of the "selfish" comments. Listen, when you are suicidal, you feel like nothing, a speck of dirt. You don't think "oh the poor train driver" because you can't imagine your life/death will have any impact on anyone. You do not feel human. You cannot imagine your actions affecting people AT ALL. It seems to be hard for some people to imagine this, and if it is hard for you to imagine that, you are lucky.

As for getting annoyed about it: I live in London. I live with the delays we face almost daily for whatever reason. If you seriously huff and puff about being late because someone died, you need to get your head out of your stupid London arse and get some perspective. I don't like being late either, who does, but it is part and parcel of living here. Grow up.

TfL are working on something for the tube apparently - power will shut off if a large object hits the track, which in theory should stop jumpers being hit by the train (but I guess there will still be enough momentum to kill or seriously injure if they jump right at the very last moment). Obviously this will still result in delays but these would be shorter, and crucially, lives will be saved.

I've only been on a train when this happened once, thankfully. The thing that rankled was the total absence of any information regarding diversions, estimated timings etc from the train staff (very important when trying to rejig connections/appointments from the stuck train) and any announcements made were at speed over poor PA equipment (ostensibly not to upset children on the train?!?! when I asked the conductor), so everyone was getting het up, not so much from the delay, or the cause of it, but because of the helplessness that they feel over it, which could be greatly attenuated by simple information.

I have also talked someone down from a bridge over the tracks, so seen a bit of both sides.

I thought it was terrible to say things like that in the wake of the Clarkson comments. Then about 2 weeks later I got stuck in London with a very fractious 18 month old or about 5 hours due to a one under at East Croydon affecting all the trains going South East oof London. We were expecting to get home by 6.30 and actually got home at midnight. You can imagine what it was like as DD did not sleep all day. It got me thinking about people that might have missed job interviews, flights to see their families, getting a contract that might save a business from bankruptcy.

Yes, people are in a terrible place but if your commuting is constantly being interrupted I can see why you would moan.

I know I once sat staring at the train tracks and listening to them singing to me; they wanted me to come to them so everything could stop. (Side effects of the medication the doctor couldn't see my problem with, on top of depression.) I hung on to the platform bench for dear life exactly because I agree that train tracks is a bad bad way to kill yourself, because of the knock-on effects for everyone else, and that's what I kept telling myself! Therefore I am grateful to all the insensitive impatient people whose comments I had heard over the years, whose voices were louder than those in my head, and who saved my life.

I've read all the posts since my last one, and I am astounded at the sheer lack of understanding so many people have!

I struggle to understand why, even if you can't empathise with the feelings of a suicidal person per se, you can't see that someone contemplating taking their own life implies a fundamentally different perspective to your own. It also suggests that the person in that position is not thinking as rationally and clearly as you either.

And this is itself should be saying to you "do you know what? You really don't understand this" and if you don't, then you are lucky.

You can still feel "grrr" if 'inconvenienced', but "selfish" and particularly "twattish" are two of the most ridiculous and ignorant words I've ever heard associated with suicide. It's not a rational decision. It is not even a choice. At the point at which you go, you are not rational.

At the point at which you jump under a train rather than take an overdose you are damned sure you want it to work. That is all.

YANBU. Those sort of comments upset me. They're so very thoughtless.

Yes I agree that there is nothing wrong with inwardly feeling a bit cross that you have been delayed, but surely in the name of compassion you would keep that to yourself. It was the way that this guy so crassly worded his status that got me.

Oh I agree folkgirl and yellowraincoat - some people's lack of insight and empathy is truly remarkable and leaves me askance. I remember when my SIL was very very ill with depression (she attempted suicide and was almost successful but mercifully recovered after a spell in ICU) her abject misery was so all consuming it was tangible. She had a very altered perception of reality and was in no position to rationally weigh up the potential knock on effects of various methods of suicide.

When I was little and travelling around Europe by train with my family, we were delayed in France somewhere because of a suicide. My mum went to find out what was happening, not realising DBro and I were right behind her. We saw more than any child person should see. I think I was about 8.

I have literally not thought about that in years. I think I had successfully blocked it - to the point where trains never even crossed my mind when I was planning my own way out a few years ago. Drowning was going to be my thing - no messy cleanup, no traumatic finding of my body by my children.

It was actually the tiny thought that I couldn't fuck up my DCs so badly for the rest of their lives that saved me in the end.

Saddened at some of the attitudes here but not shocked.

stigma stigma stigma stigma stigma stigma stigma stigma stigma

"They cannot think beyond their own situation."

Like yourself, scurryfunge?

Actually, that's even not right. Some people can think beyond their situation. It just takes a lot. You know, scurryfunge. Intelligence. Empathy. Imagination. A kind of fearlessness. You know. Don't you?