to think that this is a peculiarly nasty way for a grownup to treat a child. Warning IL related.

[lightofmylifelol]

Namechanger as I'm not sure if SIL is on here. Cutteduppear, mortimer, pearlbarley.

Well I have a lovely little boy of just 5 - he started Reception in September and is absolutely sailing through lol - the teacher is really impressed with his abilties (she told me to keep doing what I have obviously been doing with him as he's so ace [proud]) and all my mummyfriends are AmazeGosh when we talk about reading levels.

Anyway, so I do whitter abit, lol, but what happened today was this - DMIL and DFIL come round 3 times a week to help me out - I have a lo as well, and it's just so exhausting having one at school and a smaller one isn't? So they tend to do things like washing and ironing and DFIL loves to throw the hoover around - they also bring a meal to help me out and pick DS up from school twice a week and play with him here. It's usually lovely although DFIL has taught DS to drink the remains of his crisps from the packet.

So, to today, DS decided to teach gramps how to play "duminoes" pmsl, of course gramps is a good sport and pretended that DS was actually teaching him. Awww. BUT he didn't let DS win! 7 games in all they played - and gramps absolutely whooped him 6 times out of 7. The eejit. DS was exceedingly upset and cried for hours, I tried all the tactics in the book, explaining to himabout people being mean, and ice cream and extra stories at bedtime, but to no avail. The little soul went to be very saddened by the whole experience.

This really isn't on is it? We never have let him experience such unkindness before. No-one would not let a 5yo win would they? It just crumples children, and they're only young once, it's such a shame.

They've gone now but I've just sat here and thought about it and I'm fuming.

AIBU? And WIBU to speak to gramps it?

I'm still confused about why you can't do your own housework and cooking and have pil do it for you? Maybe with all that extra time you have you could teach your son how to play dominos so he doesn't put on such a bad performance next time - won 1 game out of 8? I wouldn't even risk putting that on the Internet just incase anyone noticed it was me

If your child is bright then he should work out quite quickly that in losing he needs to better his game and learn from the better player.
His apparent complete over reaction to losing only shows how totally unprepared for disappointment he is. It's essential to lose sometime as only then do some children learn about fair competition.
If he doesn't toughen up a little he will not progress to reach his full potential as he will fear failure as opposed to use it constructively. You are at risk of holding him back. Unreasonable.

yabu - your family sound like they love their grandson - I am sure they didn't mean to hurt him.

Also, it may be that as he's so bright your FIL thinks it would be good for him to challenge him rather than patronise him :)

Pearl fucking barley.

Just saying.

Learning to lose is a vital part of growing up. Life is not an "all must have prizes" scenario.

You are being ridiculous....kids have to learn to lose.

Reminds me of our DN (4) who was playing some octopus game he got for christmas....where you had to catch them with a magnetic rod.

He lost...flung down his fishing rod and stormed out of the room calling his mother a cheat. It was astounding (funny too)...but he has to learn!

YABU on two counts....not using the opportunity to teach your child that everyone has to lose sometimes.

The other count? Using eejit instead of IDIOT!!!!!

Why oh why??? has the same amount of letters (so it's hardly an abreviation).

Now this is a wind up

I think it's hilarious after the first pages of people calling troll and throwing biscuits around that people are now coming on to answer this seriously. who on earth would read this and answer as if it were real?
Brilliant. I actually haven't had a soh failure and found this quite amusing. Well done op for making me laugh.

Oh daahling!, life can be so hard for one can't it especially when you have these awful problems to deal with. Can the nanny help or his private tutor by teaching him how to play better? Why not go and share lashings of ginger beer and a cream bun with him?

I'll happily take the inlaws if they come round and let me sit on my fat arse rest

......and we wonder why so many children are so wet and unprepared for the big wide world these days?! Sounds to me that you should take some parenting lessons from DFIL... for your DS's sake. The fact that so many people share this opinion gives me hope though!

That is a bit daft! Gramps pretended enough to let your son think he didn't know how to play - that's enough play acting for one day.

And the fact that he cried for hours suggests that a little harmless and unthreateneing lesson in harsh reality was required. Is he a bit overtired atm? It does seem an overreaction TBH.

Ohhhh.....it's a joke. Doh!

So rather than give your DS a chat about how he can't win everytime you instead tell him that grandpa was mean? WTF!

I've never intentionally let dd win at anything, am very competitive. Its character building for her to get her ass beat at Spider and Fly repeatedly.

Well, I think YANBU. What a total controlling arse your FIL is.Does he not realise that your DS is in fact the Messiah? Ban him. Ban him to HEEEELLLLLLLLLL.

Please explain why it is ok that your child should win??? I think your FIL is right about winning. It is better that your child learns to play the game and win for himself.

My ds turned 5 yesterday. He can beat his grandparents at dominoes without them having to let him win.I must have a word with his teacher about placing him on teh gifted and talented list.

Course when he lost at party games at his own party he threw himself on teh floor and cried like a 2 year old

Now I am worried about startafire why have all the posts been withdrawn?
Never seen that before.

PMSL

I too got to amazegosh and thought windup. or hoped as my cousins new fiance wrote this on her FB status and I hoped he'd divorce her!

Very funny SOH.

But can I think my DS is amazegosh because the little shit he can beat me at most games.

I don't see the point of this post. You have two kids and people who come over to help you out with cleaning, cooking and collecting kids from school!
All kids should know that they can't win all the time.
Not everyone has relatives who can help out. Believe it or not, some people have to do it all themselves.
So don't have a go at Gramps, it's a small price to pay for something thousands would want.

If you let them win you make them highly unpopular with other DCs-like my friend going home and taking her monopoly board with her-halfway through a game! She had much older siblings who let her win. You need to learn to lose early on.

Jeepers.