To want ds to come into my bed?

[PavlovtheCat]

He is a bad sleeper at the best of times, but...week before Xmas he was v unwell with virus, turned into ear infection. He had fever scmost of the time and v clingy so was in with us, then on Friday last week we went on hols with family, he was still poorly, first nights slept in cot, in our room til wee hours, then in with us. Rest of the trip he was in with us as not settling, clingy, wanted to come home. Settled in our bed straight ay each night.

tonight, first right home, he is in his own bed and NOT happy. He is crying so desperately

Mummmmmmeeeee I neeeeed you
Mummmmmmeeeee I you've youuuuu
Mummmmmmeeeeee peeeeeeeeeese mummeee bed? Peeeeeees need mummmmeeeeeee bed
Aaaaaaaaaahhwwwww mummmeeeeeeee I needed youuu

If I scope him up and put him in my bed, I get to snuggle with him and watch him go to sleep and he will be asleep instantly. Instead I am listening to him crying, and will go and stroke his face in A couple of minutes.

I have enjoyed sleeping next to him again. It just feels so wrong to have him do far away from me and unhappy.

Just gose to show this co sleep bull shit is about the parents needs nt the child's at all

Why can't you go and comfor him then leave when he is sleeping

The waking and pleading will be he knows you are weak and will give in

People who don't give in don't have the pleading

Moving your oh out of his bed were he is supposed to be to move the children in we're their not supposed to be their is just somthing very unsavoury about women desperate to sleep with the children and kick their husbands out yuk

whogivesastuff totally agree

I not sure. If if laziness or some unfulfilled need why some won't get their children in a good night time routine in their own beds

I bed these people kids are fussy eaters to

Recent research shows that control fosters fear within a child .
If a child is comforted at the time it becomes distressed ( rather than leave it to cry ) these children generally develop more secure attachments .
It is a modern idea within the developed world that children should be encouraged to remain in their own beds, in their own rooms every night, for most of the night.
IMOE it has been taboo for me to talk about co sleeping with my own DC .
I am really glad for threads like these as it has shown me I'm not the only one !

That is supposed to read controlled crying fosters...

Yuk at maypoles post to infer cosleeping is unsavoury. In your tiny mind maybe, and you've reinforced thR positive of how my dh and I parent, as we sure as shit don't want to be like you.

Returns to nursing dd snuggled on bed.

Ps leaving a child to cry is really about listening to their needs?!!!

NannyPlumIsMyMum I don't recall co sleeping in the Victorian times or even in roman times hmmmm

Also no reason why you can't comfort a child who wakes in the own bed unless you are of course to lazy to walk across the hall

Also i find children who are expecting to be in mummy's bed half way trough wake often for comfort
Children who have good bed time routines for the off don't need to wake because their mummies won't be getting the during the night

What type of people encourages their child to have poor bed time routines and renagtes their oh to spare rooms as if he is in the wrong place

Who said leaving a child to cry

And mamma I am just sure in your tiny mind your oh enjoys sleeping in the spare room or just loves having all the kids squeezed in the bed passion killer or what
I am sure it's what he always dream his married life would be

If think its some need YOU have more than the child or your oh

Your children wake because they will know you will come and move them in to your bed

Maypole - you are talking shit. Coslept with ally kids, and they are happy secure kids. Eldest sleeps on own room and ds2 still cosleeps as does dd.

I see no relevance in how the eat to sleep, but for your info they eat great and wide variety too. Academically ds1 is excelling and never do I have any of them up in night.

Ds1 is on bed 8.30 eac night and ds2by 7. Dd only 10weeks so with me in evenings.

Posts like yours aren't supportive of anyone and merely have a go posts, kindly go annoy someone else x

Moving your oh out of his bed were he is supposed to be to move the children in we're their not supposed to be their is just somthing very unsavoury about women desperate to sleep with the children and kick their husbands out yuk

FFS - leaving aside the fact that your post is mostly incomprehensible anyway, what the actual FUCK do you mean, 'unsavoury'????? What is wrong with you?

Maypole fuck off. Dh is supportive and you know shit. Queen victoria was main introducer of sleeping apart from children. My children don't wake unless unwell, or with dd (10 weeks) needing milk.

Yanbu. Ds1 went through a period when he was between 1-2 of waking a lot in the night. I couldn't settle him again. In my sleep deprived state it took me a whole year to work out that he just wanted to be next to me so when he woke and wouldn't settle I would put him in our bed. It worked like a dream and we all had a good nights sleep. When he was 5 and I was pregnant with ds2 it started getting uncomfortable so he stays in his own bed now.

Ds2 is 20 months and if he won't settle I put him in our bed. It isn't every night with him he isn't as unsettled but his cot is in our room so that might make a difference.

I fail to see how what we are doing is wrong in anyway and I'm confused by posters who seem to think it is.

Feenie managed to comprehend that part just fine.

Mama supportive or get told what to do

O dear Maypole. actually co sleeping goes back to the ancient Greek civilisations .. And yes it did happen in Victorian times ,and in Germany in the 1940's and so on ...
So again I say that the notion of a child having to stay in it's own bed is a very modern convention .

Yes, I understood one word of your ridiculous post - 'unsavoury'.

Your use of the word says more about you than anybody else, tbh.

And Maypole use your brain.

some parents co sleep because they are chronically il and cannot get in and out of bed all night .
My mum co - slept with Dsis when she had cancer.
I co slept with DD when I was miscarrying .
You are a bitter person . I feel sorry for you that you have to come on a support thread and attack people who are happy co sleeping.
This would suggest you are not happy yourself ... Live and let live and go moan at some one in RL if you have the courage .

Supportive tho absolutely not your business. Just like you shit dull relationship with your dh is notice, or has he left you?

Nothing wrong with cuddling up with a poorly child if it makes you both happier and comfortable. Certainly nothing 'unsavoury'. Prolonged cosleeping wouldn't be for me, but to scoop a sad or poorly little one into your bed is just natural and obvious.

Moving your oh out of his bed were he is supposed to be to move the children in we're their not supposed to be their is just somthing very unsavoury about women desperate to sleep with the children and kick their husbands out yuk

Dear Lord Maypole, that post almost made my eyes bleed. WTAF???? Your lack of comprehension and grammar shock me. As do your views, frankly.....

We co-sleep with ds age 4 quite often still, esp. when he's ill. He will come in to our bed about 5-6 in the morning and have a cuddle/doze then too. OP, I'd co-sleep with your ds while he is ill - makes most sense. Hope he's better soon.

Maypole : do you have children?
I find your way of thinking rather sick.
You imply it is strange for a mother to sleep with her children.
The only people who would think this is strange are those with deranged thoughts.
Speaks far more for you than anyone else here.
I feel rather sorry for your children.

Wow maypole it always surprises me that some people think you can only have sex while in bed. At least we co-sleepers have interesting sex lives

The majority of families around the world all sleep in one room, suggesting that it is maypole who is the odd one.

Maybe taking this off on a tangent, but a question to all you co-sleepers (and there seem to be lots of you)...what do you do about your sex lives? Lock yourselves in the bathroom? Wait till all the children are at school/nursery? Just curious...

Ds is 6 and arrives in our bed any time between 11 and 4. So sometimes the bed is fine, and sometimes we are...er...more creative. Certainly doesn't hamper our sex life any.

Shag elsewhere in the house. It is not a problem, we have sex about twice a week without needing a bed.

Really?? So the fact that you KNOW your DS is going to be popping in doesn't put you off at all? Does he knock? I'm assuming some of these co-sleeping kids are too small to do that, so just wander in...